Page 21 of As the Rain Falls (Sainte Madeleine #1)

Antony laughs, his dark skin glows under the sunlight. Using my second name is a rare thing, which he only does when he’s trying to mock me.I’m named after my uncle. I don’t know why Tony finds it so funny, but I guess it’s just about how archaic my name rings.

Beckett Ethan Evans .

I let my head fall back to stare at the wide open sky. The clouds are so close to the earth, I could even reach out anytime and grab a piece of them. No place in the world looks like this. I hate it so bad that I can’t help but love it, too. My hometown is the dearest thing to me.

“Screw you, Tony!”

“You’re the one who just fell like a piece of shit going down the toilet,” he deadpans, motioning with his hands. “Ploof!”

“Oh, yeah? And you’re one to talk, dipshit. I haven’t seen you go for a single wave today.” I jab a wet finger at him, using the same tone as he just did. “By the way, shouldn’t you begetting ready for dinner? Putting on some fancy clothes?”

Antony’s mom makes a big deal out of eating out at least once a week with her family. She calls it Mom special time, which I find utterly, utterly adorable. The Silvas are the most united front I’ve ever seen. Even Tony’s cousins, who I only met once or twice, have a wholesome vibe about them.

“Dinner’s highly overrated,” Antony answers while waving me off. “I just can’t stand the routine anymore. All I do is drive to Sainte Madeleine, go home. Drive to Sainte Madeleine, go home. Drive to…”

“Alright, alright. I get it.” I climb back on my board, tugging at the necklace around my neck. I should’ve taken it off before hitting in the water, but it seems like I forgot. “So, you’re still grounded?”

“Nah.” His nose twitches. “Mom decided she doesn’t care about what I’m doing with my life anymore. She told Dad I’m a worthless good-for-nothing and she’s tired of my bullshit. It’s all about the twins now.”

“And you’re cool with that?”

“As cool as a cucumber,” Antony brushes it off, adding casually. “I’d rather have her forget all about me than to have her up in my business like she did last year.”

I nod quickly, understanding what he means. Last year was hell. School is the main reason why Antony and Lucia had to break up for good after so many years of dating on-and-off. Dealing with the aftermath of that was shitty.

“Angelina is back, by the way.”

The sudden change of topic hits me like a slap, and for a second, I feel the air get knocked out of me.

“So I’ve heard,” I answer carefully, keeping my voice even. “You’ve talked to her?”

He nods. “In passing.”

“I haven’t.” I feel my chest tightens. “But… I was thinking of giving her a call soon.”

“To apologize?”

I give him a long look. “What else would I be calling her for?”

“Well, when you put it like that.” He tilts his head. “Angie totally deserves an apology or two.”

“I know, I know,” I agree, regretting my past decisions. “I want to apologize.”

Antony winces. “You definitely shouldn’t have said it was her fault.”

I swallow hard. “Yeah, I shouldn’t have.”

But it was hard not to.Back then, everything felt true to me.

Angelina was Lucia’s partner in crime which I loved, but she also had this nasty habit of lying to me to cover for my sister which I hated.

For the longest time ever, Lucia always got away with everything: breaking curfew, going to parties she shouldn’t have been at, getting drunk at the beach, vanishing to places where no one could find her for hours.

Our parents gave us freedom, and Lucia wanted to do it all. Angelina always dove in headfirst, no questions asked.

Every single fucking time.

I knew something bad would happen eventually, but I couldn’t put a stop to it either. Lucia got to an age where she wouldn’t listen to me anymore. I was not her father, and she hated when I acted like it. I became just her older brother, and somehow that wasn’t enough of a reason for her to listen.

The funeral was our breaking point in a lot of ways.

One second we were grieving together, and the next I was screaming at Angelina.

The argument escalated quickly because I couldn’t handle my temper.

I blamed her for Lucia’s death because it was easier than blaming myself, and it nearly broke her mind.

There’s not a single day where I don’t regret acting so selfishly, especially knowing about her condition.

“Angelina isn’t one to hold a grudge,” he reassures me quietly. “I’m pretty sure she’ll forgive you.”

“But this is more than just a grudge,” I sigh, swinging my feet back and forth in the water. “I feel like I’m… I’m the reason why she had to go to the hospital, Tony.”

“No, man,” he disagrees, voice steady. “You said some things you didn’t mean.”

The problem is, at the time, I did. I meant a little bit of everything I said. In the heat of the moment, blinded by my own rage, I meant it. And Angelina isn’t stupid, she knows me well enough to be able to guess that I wasn’t kidding.

“Hey.” Antony swims closer and grabs my leg, shaking it. “Stop thinking about it.”

I force myself to smile. “I’m not.”

“You are, dumbass. That’s literally all you ever do.”

Tony knocks his surfboard into mine. A small wave rocks us, but we stay afloat in spite of it.

“It happens, okay?” his voice softens. “Especially with people you care about. Things get rough, and you butt heads, but an actual apology goes a long way. It’s worth something, Evans.”

“Let’s hope you’re right,” I breathe out. “Because I do care about her. She’s family.”

“Of course, she is,” he grins.

But I still have a feeling it won’t be that simple.

The sun is dipping low now, and I can see several houses piled up together, one over the other at the top of a hill. There’s a lighter patch of bright sand that disappears underneath the rocks, and the waves crash violently against the shore.

This place is all I know. It’s part of who I am, and it used to be part of Lucia too.

Still is.

Her body is buried here, rotting under this island. She’ll never get to lie to me again, make those ridiculous out-of-breath sounds as she laughs, or wave at me from the shore with Pepé barking at her feet.

I get caught up in things and I start to forget about her dying on me, only to remember that she isn’t here. We were supposed to do so many things together, including leaving.

Now I’ll never know what it could have been. Where I would’ve ended up if she’d stuck around.

So, why even think about it?

“Le Port is so much smaller from afar, isn’t it?” I mention while staring at the island with longing. “It looks so peaceful.”

Antony stays quiet, allowing me to catch my breath.I touch the tattoo over my chest, my sister’s name carved forever on my skin. He breaks the silence.

“Wanna head back and beg Silvio for free quesadillas?”

“What’s that Brazilian saying again?” I shake my head, fighting off a smile. “You only think with your stomach?”

He grins. “Oh, come on. It’s not just about the food. There’s this party Caleb Monteiro’s out giving tickets to if you buy his special Saturday virgin cocktails.”

Well.

Hate the guy, not his party tickets, I guess.

Nonalcoholic cocktails infamously don’t sell well at Silvio’s. Every waiter has to work twice as hard to trick tourists into buying them, which usually only works after they’re already tipsy enough.

“No, man. I’m beat.” I shake my head. “Go with your new friends, I don’t care about parties.”

“New friends? What? Are you jealous?” He paddles closer, trying to climb over my board. “Party pooper, let me kiss your balding head. You know damn well you’re my one and only.”

“I am not balding! Dude, you’re gonna flip us—”

I screech with pain as he brings me into a hug. There’s a sly grin in his face, and I jump backwards instinctively, forgetting that’s exactly what I shouldn’t be doing. Too late.

“Careful!”

I close my eyes as the board tips, making me land hard on the water. Antony follows right behind me, falling too, and dragging me under.

The last thing I hear before the waves swallow us whole is his stupid, loud cackling.