Page 20 of As the Rain Falls (Sainte Madeleine #1)

Part of Well’s extended family. I know the guy well enough.He is a bit of a loser.Attractive, smooth talker.Still a loser though.

“Isn’t he dating the girl who works at the nail salon next to L’Impasse?”

L’Impasse is a nightclub, three blocks away from Silvio’s. The bouncer looks tough, but he will let you in for ten bucks slipped into his palm, if you know what I mean.

I once had to deliver fresh fruits for cocktails recipes to their door and found Lucia passed out in one of their velvet couches. Angelina had been kneeling at her feet with a worried look on her face, shaking her shoulders, trying to wake her up.

“Maria, yeah. She helps her ma’ on the weekends.” Tony rolls his eyes, brushing it off as something unimportant. “That’s what I keep telling Mateo, but he swears to me they’ve broken up.”

I try to remember who Mateo is, but his name isn’t all that familiar to me.

“Isn’t he a loser?” I ask, talking about Caleb.

“A loser?” Antony laughs bitterly. “That guy sells drugs at parties, Beckett. I once caught him trying to dump a pill into Angelina’s cup. The tiny red heart-shaped pills.”

Le Port is dealing with drug problems. Because it’s such a touristic place, it’s hard to track what comes and goes through our borders. The heart-shaped pills have been an issue for at least half a decade. I’m not surprised Caleb is involved; a lot of boys his age also are.

Antony explains, “That shit melts into your drink so easily too, you don’t even notice it. And if Cassandra is dating him—”

My heart drops to my stomach.

“But maybe it’s not true?” I say a little too quickly, not liking the idea of Cassandra involved with someone like him. I don’t want her to be in trouble, much like I’d hate for Angelina to be around a guy like that, too. “I mean, I don’t think she’d go for a guy like Caleb.”

I try to picture the kind of guy Cassandra should be dating.

Someone as good and as kind as she is.

Maybe a protector, even.

“I’ve never seen them together, so you might have a point there,” Antony grumbles, nudging the tiniest fish away from him, and directing it back towards the deeper parts of the ocean.

“But I’ve seen him staring at her in class and stuff.

Caleb is always cracking jokes to get her attention. It’s annoying.”

Right .

They share classes together. Even if they aren’t the closest friends, Caleb definitely has enough opportunities to shoot his shot at Sainte Madeleine.

“Does it work?” I wonder, definitely more curious than I should be feeling about a girl I’m not dating.

“Sometimes, I guess. I don’t think she likes it, though.

She’s a bit shy, isn’t she? Like, he’s more of an attention seeker, if anything.

” There’s something off showing in Antony’s face, but maybe it’s just annoyance.

He sighs deeply, his dark brown eyes shifting to meet mine.

“You should stay away from her. If they’re together, she’s probably into his bullshit. ”

“Easy, man.” I frown at his words, thinking he’s being a bit too harsh. “It’s not like we know they’re a thing for sure.”

“But she’s a huge mess,” Antony scoffs. “You’re really taking her side?”

“It’s not about taking sides, it’s about being fair.” I lean on my surfboard, wetting my hands to wash off the sand from underneath my fingers. “I’m not a high school student anymore, Tony. I don’t care if Cassandra Rivera is dating some stupid guy.”

“Really?” Tony raises a brow, unimpressed. “You’re sulking right now, but you don’t care at all?”

“I don’t,” I answer defensively.“And I’m not sulking.”

He shrugs, “Okay. If you say so.”

“And neither should you,” I snap, a little more serious than before. “You know how Sainte Madeleine is.”

It’s the only Catholic school in a very small town. Regardless of whether the students are religious or not, people have a tendency to take a small situation and blow it totally out of proportion just to have something to talk about.

Bullying is fairly common, and some of the teachers feed into the culture. The only reason why Tony doesn’t get pushed around is because he’s way too cool to allow anyone to do it.

“The kids are bored, man.” I shake my head. “But you can’t be like the rest of them. Rise above it.”

“Yeah, I know. You’re right,” he agrees, looking a little more guilty. “I’m just like, why Caleb? Out of all people, why him? He’s bad news. I keep warning Mateo, but he’s doing that thing where he tries to play nice. It’s phony.”

I think I get where he’s coming from, but it’s still not fair to pin this on Cassandra. If anything, I’m more worried for her now than ever. This guy will definitely bring her down if she gets too close.

Why is he even sniffing around her?

He’s supposed to have a girlfriend, or whatever.

“I really don’t think they’re seeing each other.” I pause. “But if it turns out to be a problem, I’ll just ask her. We’re friends, and I just want her to watch the dog. It’s not like we’re together, or something.”

Whoever she’s dating? None of my business.I mean, it’s really not. I say it like I mean it, and I almost totally do. It’s just—

Argh.

I wish I hadn’t been told all this.

I hate to gossip.

“Yeah, totally,” Antony agrees with a nod, dropping the topic.

“But seriously, I think you should do something about it.” He starts smirking.

“Your father gives you shit? Be a bigger asshole than he is, or let me handle it. I’m ready to defend your honor, man.

Text me the day and the time. I’ll meet you there. We’ll take him down!”

I laugh, not taking him seriously.He splashes water onto my face, and I close my eyes to avoid it.

“I’m being serious! I could totally beat his ass, or something. You know I do capoeira twice a week now. I’m basically a weapon waiting to be used!”

“Don’t even bother.”

“Oh, man. Don’t tell me not to bother,” he whines. “ All I do is bother!”

“Don’t I know it.” I lay on my stomach, using both my arms to push me forwards towards the wave. “It’s not that big of a deal, Tony.”

He pushes, still not getting it, “But doesn’t it make you mad?”

“What?”

“How he doesn’t seem to care.”

“About Lucia?”

“About anything , Beckett,” Antony pauses to wipe some of the water away from his face. A wave crashes, nearly pulling him under. He yells louder, trying to gain back his footing, “I swear, it’s like he’s not even your dad, or something! It’s so weird!”

I let his words roll over me, not taking it to heart.Antony has a terrible lack of filter. He always blurts out stuff without considering if that’s truly the best way to put it. Raw and fast. His timing is often lacking, too. But deep down, I know his heart’s in the right place and he means well.

“I can’t let him get to me anymore!” I tell him, wanting him to understand, but I’m also mostly speaking to myself. “It is what it is, man!”

I’m about to live a long life full of disappointments if I keep expecting for something to change. My need for his approval is the last part of me I need to kill, the last bit of attachment I still feel towards my father. Once that’s fully gone, there will be nothing left.

I already don’t have an ounce of respect for him. Truthfully, I barely even know the man.

“My father’s not a normal dad,” I settle, not trying to get into the depths of all the reasons why Gregory Evans shouldn’t have become a father of two. “Compared to yours, at least, he never was.”

Marcos takes care of the house, watches over the twins, and helps them with their homework every single day. He’s dedicating his retirement to being a good father to all of them and doing social work in our community.

My father would never do something like that.

“Yes, but… Beckett, hold on!” Antony opens his mouth, but I ignore his pleads, already swimming away from him. “Wait up, man!”

Exhaustion hits me, making my eyelids drop. I blink hard to keep myself awake, the ocean becoming completely muffled.

Antony’s yelling is growing more distant as the ringing in my ear gets louder and louder.“A big one is coming!”

“Yeah,” I whisper to myself.

Adrenaline surges as I start to focus, followed by a sense of tranquility that I’ve been chasing all week. Two very distinctive feelings, I know. But that’s what surfing is to me: all and nothing at the same time.

It’s an acquired skill, not as easy as it looks at all.

The first time I was allowed to leave the shore was a complete disaster.

I couldn’t pedal with my arms fast enough, and as I tried to stand upright my hands slipped off the board.

I fell head first, and my right ear knocked against the water, which nearly gave me an infection later on.

Falling stung so bad that I even sobbed. Dad drove me back home right after, scared to death that I was having an episode, but I just felt disappointed and my ego was bruised. Lucia made fun of me until I told her she had a horse face, which made her cry.

I was a good brother, but I wasn’t always a nice one.

I prepare myself to stand, but I don’t even last long enough to actually do it.

How ironic.

“Fuck!”

Less than a minute later, the water is pulling me under.

I keep holding my breath, clutching the surfboard to try and break through the surface.

Everything becomes blue around me, and I open my eyes to try to see through the ocean.

The wave is crashing right above me, and my heart is beating so fast.

Too fast.

Don’t choke .

A thought comes to mind, one that I always try to push away. I don’t want to think about how staying here makes me feel so depressed. There’s not a single thing tying me to Le Port, not anymore. And yet, something tells me not to leave.

This isn’t the life I planned.

Lucia shouldn’t be gone.

“Look at you, falling like a piece of shit! You’re so out of shape, Ethan!”