Page 89 of Oleander

A warm buzz of pleasure had settled over me as I walked, as I played over what he’d just done to me, the sight of me in his mouth, the look in his eyes. I realised with a jolt that I hadn’t even kissed him.

Neither had he gotten off. What would I have done if he’d asked me to return the favour? Would I have gotten to my knees for him? Let him grip my hair and thrust into my mouth? As heat shot up my spine and between my legs, I knew that I would.

But then Ellie’s face appeared in my mind, and the warm buzz turned to a chill.

I wasn’t hungry anymore.

Twenty-five

The smell of the pork and bean stew hit me as I reached the back door. Elspeth was humming to herself as she chopped something green and leafy on the large central workspace.

“Jude, sweetheart. Come in, come in. I’ve made some bean crock, and there’s plenty to go around. Is Cas with you?”

“He’s in the stables; he’ll be here in a minute.” I told her I was going to wash up and slipped from the kitchen towards the downstairs cloakroom to wash my hands.

Gideon was coming down the grand staircase as I passed.

“Young master Alcott! How are you this fine day?”

I glanced up, trying to gauge his mood by noting what he was wearing: a three-piece suit. “I’m good, thanks, you?”

“Marvellous, just marvellous. Are you looking for my nephew? I think he went riding this morning, but he should be back any minute now.” He came down the stairs and drew a look over me. “Did you two have fun last night?”

My cheeks grew warm. “Um, yeah, we watched a movie. Hung out.” I shrugged.Everything you think and feel is in your eyes, you know. I skirted my eyes away from his.

Gideon’s eyebrows rose. He seemed bubbly, almost and as eager as a child. “Oh, Cas said you watched the rugby.”

“We did, yeah, then a movie. I don’t think he was very into it. It was sort of on in the background.”

“While you talked?” he said. “You must have had a lot of catching up to do. Between you and me,” He leaned in. A vaguely sweet, boozy smell emanated from him, half-hidden beneath his cologne. “I think he missed you.”

“I don’t know about that,” I said, though I was secretly delighted.

“And I know you missed him too, didn’t you?” At this, he tilted his head and gave me the sort of look you would give a baby.

“I—”

“What are you doing, uncle? Don’t you have some port to bathe in?” Caspien’s voice blew in like a chill wind.

We both turned to him.

“Darling nephew. You didn’t fall off your horse then?”

“Afraid not,” Caspien said. “I am going upstairs to shower and change. Bring the stew to the library, will you?” he said to me as he pushed past us and leapt up the stairs two at a time.

We both watched him go.

“Normally, he’s in a better mood after his ride,” Gideon mused after Caspien had disappeared down the upper-level corridor towards his bedroom. “Anyway, I have some work to do. You two have fun now.” He patted me good-naturedly on the back and floated off.

I wasn’t sure what ‘work’ Gideon did. There seemed to be a lot of signatures required on wads of paper being ferried in and out of Deveraux by courier. Hours spent on the phone with him talking animatedly in French or Italian. German sometimes, too. I assumed it had something to do with investments or shares but it was murky to me. A vague thing that never much interested me.

Elspeth had made up a tray, and I took the two bowls of stew, small bread rolls fresh from the oven which she’d smeared with jersey butter, and two glasses of squash into the library and waited for him to return. My appetite had returned as soon as I’d smelled the bean crock, and I was so ravenous that I picked up a roll and bit into it before Caspien arrived. I managed another five minutes before I picked up my spoon and began shovelling the soupy bean and pork stew into my mouth.

By the time Caspien arrived, showered and redressed in a pair of blue pyjama bottoms and a white long-sleeved T-shirt, I’d finished my bowl.

“It’ll be cold,” I said, indicating the bowl. “Do you want me to ask her to heat it back up?”

“It’s fine,” he said, sitting on the sofa next to me. He lifted the bread, tore off a piece and dipped it into the rich gravy. Rather than watch him eat – his mouth doing entirely innocent things forced more perverted notions into my head – I got up and perused the shelves. Before long, I found myself at the rows Gideon had told me belonged to his sister, Caspien’s mother. I wasn’t surprised to see clothbound copies of things likeWuthering Heights, Anna Karenina, andRebecca. There were also a string of worn paperbacks with Mills & Boon printed on the spine.The French Lieutenant’s WifeandLady Chatterley’s Loverwere by far the most well-read. They were both in multiple parts, yellowed pages flaking off the spine and the covers detached in loose sheafs.