Page 247 of The Havenport Collection

Matteo

I left work early today; things were in order and I wanted to get home and make dinner.

Valentina had talked Eliza into staying for dinner, and I was secretly thrilled.

It was crazy how much I missed Eliza. To her credit, she had accepted my apology and was her normal, fun, lovely self.

She was professional and kind, and Val adored her.

I, however, lived in agony. I wanted to walk in the door and kiss her hello.

I wanted to spend my nights wrapped up in her, talking and making love and laughing.

Since the night in the alleyway, we had exchanged flirty texts and some sexy glances, but hadn’t had a moment to talk.

I was dying to know what she was thinking.

Was she willing to give this a try? Because every day without her strengthened my resolve to try.

Yes, I was freaking out, but she was just too special to pass up.

Sometimes, I just closed my eyes and wished I was a different sort of guy, someone unencumbered who would sweep her off her feet and give her my undivided time and attention.

But that was not going to happen. So I would settle for silently lusting after my babysitter and enjoying her flirty glances.

And I needed to stay focused. We needed to have a really strong summer this year in the restaurant, and maybe then I’d be able to afford more help.

And I had my first meeting with an attorney next week to discuss Mandy and her custody threats.

I was busy—too busy—and Eliza provided me with a beautiful distraction.

I got inside and immediately set to work making dinner.

I cooked all day, every day—it was automatic to me at this point—but cooking for Eliza gave me a rush I hadn’t felt in a long time.

She was sitting at the table, helping Valentina with her math homework and sneaking glances at me.

She was wearing a tight yellow T-shirt with a pair of those leggings that drove me crazy.

Her hair was down, and my mind immediately envisioned pulling on it while she was on her knees for me.

These were precisely the thoughts I knew I had to stop.

But my stupid brain would not let her go.

“Dad, I’m doing really well in math. Eliza helped me figure out long division, and I’m killing it.”

I rummaged in the fridge for the scallions I had bought yesterday. “That’s great, sweetie,” I called over my shoulder, noticing Eliza checking out my ass as I bent over. Huh, I loved it when she ogled me like a piece of meat.

This was impossible. Now I was thinking about her again.

“Does that mean I can get a pig now?” Val asked sweetly, and I bumped my head on the door.

“No.”

“Wait, what?” Eliza looked confused.

I rubbed my forehead. “Val wants a pet pig. She keeps asking, and the answer is always no.”

“I can’t have a dog or a cat because of my allergies and asthma,” she explained to Eliza. “So I have been researching pets. And I don’t want a lizard or anything dumb like that.”

Eliza nodded, as if this was a totally reasonable conversation.

“I want a pig. They are really smart and trainable. You can house-train them and walk them on a leash, and they are loyal and smart.”

“No pigs. No pets. We have enough going on in this house right now.” I went back to chopping. Valentina was a master at wearing me down, but I was not going to budge on this one.

“Ple-e-ease, Daddy? Pretty please.”

I glared at her and shook my head.

Val stood up angrily and stomped her feet. “You are the worst. Your face is weird and you have stinky morning breath.” She turned to Eliza with a sweet smile. “I’m going upstairs to finish my homework.” And then I heard her storm upstairs and slam her bedroom door.

I looked at Eliza, who was biting her lip and shaking to keep from laughing out loud.

“She’s impossible.” I sighed.

Eliza shrugged. “She’s a kid. And she’s an only child. Trust me. I was an only child, and in between being desperate for siblings I also longed for pets.” I had forgotten that she was an only child. That concept was still so foreign to me, despite the fact that I was raising one.

“Did your parents ever crack?” I asked, desperately hoping the answer was no.

“Yes. Eventually. They were both super busy, so they let me get a dog for my tenth birthday. I had to be responsible and take care of him. They didn’t want to train a puppy, so we went to the shelter and got Bud. He was a five-year-old golden retriever, and I loved him more than anything.

“He was my best friend and he lived a super long time for a golden. He died right before I left for college. It was like he knew I was leaving him.” She wiped away a tear, and I had to stifle the urge to hug her. She was not helping my case.

“You are killing me right now, do you know that? You are on Team Val, aren’t you?”

“Who me?” She feigned innocence, wiping the tears from her eyes. “I’m neutral.” She crossed her heart. “Switzerland.”

“You’re not fooling me.”

She stuck her tongue out. And I had to grip the edge of the counter to keep from walking over there and kissing her senseless.

Being an adult sucked.

“Get out, Dad. We’ve got this!” Val squealed, pushing me out of the kitchen. This was unusual. If there was a mess, I was usually the one cleaning it.

“Yeah,” Eliza added. “You cooked; now you get to relax. The girls are cleaning tonight.”

“I can help.”

“Nope. Go away, Dad.”

I held up my hands. “Okay, I know when I’m not wanted.” I headed to the couch where I collapsed and mindlessly scrolled through my phone while Eliza and Val joked and giggled in the kitchen.

I closed my eyes and heard Val telling Eliza about school, and who her best friend was this week. I smiled as I listened—my daughter was quite the talker.

As I was starting to nod off on the couch I heard Valentina say, “That’s why it’s so difficult to make friends, because I am sick and can’t be normal like the rest of them.”

I sat straight up. I hated that this was something she had to bear. That she had to feel like the sick kid compared to her peers.

I was standing up to go hug her and tell her she was awesome when I heard Eliza reply, “You know, I have a chronic condition too.”

“Really? You have asthma too?”

“No. I have something called ADHD.”

“Oh, I’ve heard of that. Is that when you’re hyper all the time?”

I stood, peering at them as they spoke. Eliza was crouched down, her hand on Val’s shoulder, a dishrag thrown over her arm. It made my heart clench.

“That’s a common misconception. Basically, my body may look calm, but my brain is always sort of running on overdrive. Like a duck—they float along the edge of the water, but underneath, their legs are kicking like crazy. That’s sort of like my brain.”

“Okay. I get it. So your brain isn’t normal.”

“My brain works differently than other people’s. Just like your lungs work differently. And I take medicine and do certain types of exercises to help my brain, and you take medicine and do certain types of exercises for your lungs.”

“Really? So you are broken too? Like me?” My heart was in my throat. How could my perfect daughter ever think she was broken? I hated that I couldn’t fix things for her. I hated that she felt this way.

Eliza reached out and ruffled her hair. “Oh, girl. We are not broken. Not by a long shot. We’re just different.

And if anything, these differences make us work harder and smarter than everyone else.

When things don’t come easily, we become more resilient.

We are better at dealing with setbacks and disappointments. ”

Val put her hands on her hips. “I have disappointments all the time!” She stomped a tiny foot, and I suppressed a giggle.

I said a silent prayer of thanks that all the setbacks had not lessened her sass.

“I can’t do sleepovers, I can’t have pets, I can only do some sports, and even then my dad flips out. I just want to be a normal kid.”

“Come sit down,” Eliza said. She pulled a chair over for Val, who sat down quietly. I leaned back so they couldn’t see me eavesdropping.

“You aren’t a normal kid. You’re a super kid.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Think about it. You are really smart. Like so super smart. You have the vocabulary of a twenty-eight-year-old PhD student and you are so funny. You are sassy and wise. How do you think you got that way? You developed these talents because you’re not normal. You’re different and special.”

“I do have a lot of time to read.”

“Yes, because of your asthma you’ve read a lot—and look at all that reading has done for you. And you have such confidence. You stand up for yourself and others.”

“So stop comparing yourself to regular kids. Normal is boring. And you, my beautiful Valentina Rossi, are so not boring.”

There was a pause, and I leaned in to see Val throw her arms around Eliza’s neck.

“I love you, Eliza.”

“I love you too, kid. And don’t be so hard on your dad, okay? He’s trying to keep you safe. And I know it can feel like a lot. But he loves big and sometimes that love needs a place to go.”

Val pulled back and looked at her. “Is that why he buys so many first aid kits?”

Eliza laughed. “Yes. Among other things. It’s how he shows his love.” She wasn’t wrong. I was a neurotic mess and overprotective to a pathological degree, but it was because I just wanted to wrap everyone I loved in a protective bubble forever.

Val, clearly feeling better, bounced back over to the sink and grabbed her drying towel. “When we finish cleaning up will you read to me?”

“I’d love to. But only if you let me do silly voices again.”

“I insist.”

Standing here, watching Eliza empower my daughter, something shifted inside my chest. I was overcome with the realization that my cells were rearranging themselves in my body. If I survived this, whatever it was, I would never be the same.

She had no idea what she was doing—just how much she was helping Val. And it moved me deeply.

Her kindness, her goodness, and her tough, but sunny attitude—they were so fucking beautiful.

All this time, I had been fighting my physical attraction to Eliza.

But this went so much deeper. I kept telling myself it was just sex and things were better this way, but sitting here, listening to her with my daughter, I knew this was so much more than sex.

I knew my attraction was far deeper than just physical. And I had no idea what to do about it.

I headed back to the living room while Val chatted about the robot she was building at school as they headed up the stairs for Eliza to read to her. I was sweaty and confused.

Val was attached to Eliza.

I was attached to Eliza.

Actually, I was more than attached. If I wasn’t careful, I’d end up falling in love with her.