Page 94 of Obligation and Redemption

She did as her husband said, tears streaming down her face. Oh, stupid, stupid Lizzy! What have I done? –Talking to that man when I knew Mr. Darcy would be furious?

Elizabeth ran up to her former room, nervously pacing as she awaited her scolding.

She knew he was justified in his anger towards her and felt the full weight of her guilt.

At least she was at Longbourn and with her family.

Of course what good would that do? Mr. Darcy had every right to be angry and to punish her in whatever way he saw fit.

He had never hurt her in any malicious way, but she really could not judge his character adequately to know if he might not raise a hand to her with the right provocation.

Then she thought of how Mr. Darcy had hurt Jane and could not find it in her heart to be sorry if seeing her and Wickham together offended him; she was just sorry that he had surprised them with his resentful presence.

Darcy had received an express the previous evening from Janette, as he had requested, letting him know that Elizabeth seemed to be back to her usual self, perhaps even better.

She had taken exercise and eaten more than one would expect from a genteel lady, certainly more than Janette had ever witnessed.

Not wanting to cause a stir but cognisant of her loyalties, she also told Mr. Darcy about the officers visiting the family and Elizabeth’s apparent connection with the young men.

She only casually brought it up in context of Elizabeth’s health and demeanour, but that was all that was needed to alert Darcy that Wickham might still be in the area and taking advantage of Elizabeth’s return to Longbourn.

In fact, Darcy began to wonder anew if that might not be why Elizabeth was so desirous of returning home early.

So the following morning, he set out at sunrise for Meryton.

This was the day prior to his planned journey, and he hoped a room would be available at the inn.

Of course, if what the maid said were an indication of Wickham’s imposition on his wife, he would likely insist they leave immediately for Pemberley.

Darcy dropped off his manservant at the Inn of Meryton in order to secure their suite of rooms and then went straight to Longbourn.

He decided to ride by horseback so that the post horses could rest without causing a delay.

Darcy’s stallion had been relocated to Pemberley with the servants, so instead he rode a young and spirited mare that had travelled alongside the carriage.

Longbourn was but two miles from Meryton, so he made good time.

As he approached the manor, he detected the colour red that matched the uniform of the militia from behind the house.

His breathing increased as he realised that his concerns were justified.

On the far side of the garden against the hedgerow, he saw that Elizabeth was walking with one of the officers.

He could recognise that swag anywhere and so knew her companion to be Wickham.

How dare Elizabeth disobey me! Will I ever be free of that man?

Rather than warn them of his presence, he tied off the mare at the front of the house, then quietly, but with determination made his way to where his wife was engaged by Wickham’s charms. He could hear her laughter ring clear in the cold breeze as she ambled, wearing the warm coat that he himself had picked out for her.

Just as Wickham leaned down to say something quietly to her, Darcy reached over to remove Elizabeth from the scene.

In anger, he told Elizabeth to go inside the house, so he could deal with his nemesis.

Darcy wanted to lash out in physical retribution for all of the pain Wickham had caused his family, for poisoning his wife against him, for hurting Georgiana, for deceiving his father, for shaming the Darcy name with his gaming debts and illegitimate children that Darcy himself now had to preserve.

But he held his temper in check. He recollected his location and had no desire to embarrass the Bennets with an attack while on their property, especially in light of the wedding arrangements.

This was a good remembrance, considering two other soldiers were in attendance who might not have seen the justice in Darcy’s retribution.

Wickham laughed outright at Darcy’s dilemma. “Darcy, such a temper you have. I do believe the passionate Elizabeth might have had a stimulating effect on you.”

“You go too far, Wickham. I will say this one last time, stay away from my wife.” Although he said this in low tones, his contempt could not be missed.

“But Darcy, why does it bother you if I talk to Elizabeth? You certainly have no feelings for her.” They stood facing one another, unflinching.

“I see how it is; you can’t stand for someone to admire me.

You have all of the adoration any one person could stand, yet you have always been jealous of me. ”

“My relationship with my wife is none of your concern. Stay away from her, or I will destroy you.”

“Elizabeth would never forgive you.”

“Keep Mrs. Darcy out of this.”

“You have done nothing but hurt Elizabeth with your imposing manner and self-righteous attitude. You remind her everyday how much better you are than she is, so if Elizabeth did welcome a clandestine seduction, it was your fault, not mine. I can’t help it if believing me came easy for her. I sweet-talked her; you despised her.”

It took everything in Darcy not to pummel Wickham.

They were not two feet from one another, staring eye-to-eye.

Darcy was getting his breathing under regulation as he said, “You know nothing.” Darcy then turned to walk to the house, incensed and needing an outlet to vent his anger.

He kept squeezing his hands into fists as he imagined striking Wickham’s pretty face.

How could Elizabeth believe the man’s lies?

After all I have done for her, she still prefers Wickham.

Does she let him kiss her and make love to her? His thoughts were too much to bear.

Darcy had spent years watching Wickham’s deceptive charms manipulate his father and then almost destroy his sister.

Since that fateful day of discovering Georgiana’s plans to elope with Wickham, Darcy’s life had seemed to plunge more and more out of control.

The usually disciplined and unyielding man had been desperately attempting to once again gain command of his own existence, and now Wickham was exerting his influence on Darcy’s own wife.

Darcy had been patient with Elizabeth, demanding little from her, yet when he did, she spurned him – so unlike the smiles and welcome she easily gifted to other men – to Wickham.

She was his wife, not Wickham’s! He walked into the house and asked the first person he saw, the housekeeper, where Elizabeth was located.

After taking his coat, she directed him towards her room.

As he climbed the stairs, he tried to gain control of his vehemence but could not.

He kept imagining Elizabeth in the arms of Wickham, hearing her laugh at his false tales.

He found the door to her room easily enough, turned the handle and walked in.

There she was in tears, as she asked, “What did you do to him?”

“What did I do to him? Why don’t you tell me what he did to you , or rather with you ?”

“You think Mr. Wickham in some way hurt me or led me astray? He has never hurt me. You, on the other hand, have in countless ways.”

“By saving your family? ”

“Will that always be the way you shame me into being a good wife to you, by throwing in my face how noble you were in that whole affair. You seem to forget that I may have saved your life out in those woods,” she cried, pointing outside. “Does that mean nothing to you?”

“I can’t even know for certain if you are telling me the truth about that day. How do I know that you and Wickham did not set me up? That sounds like the kind of thing he would do. You may have been out in the woods meeting him when I came along and decided to take advantage of the situation.”

“There is nothing I can say to convince you of what really happened that day. Until you want to know the truth you will continue in your state of mistrust, and our marriage will continue to be tainted by your suspicions.”

“I see that you don’t deny it, Elizabeth.”

“I have nothing more to say to you.” She turned to leave the room, but he caught her arm, thus stopping her.

“You will stay here with me.” He pulled her close so she was against him, their faces inches apart.

“You are angry with me. I think you should let me leave before we say or do anything we will regret.”

Angry is right , Darcy thought – more so than he had ever been in his life, more so even than when he discovered Wickham’s plan to ruin Georgiana, but for reasons even he could not fully comprehend, for in his pride and resentment he could not see how his conflicting feelings for his wife warred within his breast.

“Regret? Is that what you feel when we are alone together in your bedchamber? I need a wife who wants me and me alone,” he said in quiet outrage, suspecting that Elizabeth had secretly united in a physical and emotional bond with his greatest adversary.

She just stared at him. What could she say?

She did not want to make him more impassioned, but she could not say that she had ever desired him, regardless of her friendship with his former friend.

Darcy then unexpectedly pulled her even closer and kissed her, not the kind of kiss that showed how he might care for her, but a kiss that declared her to be his.

With effort, Elizabeth was able to pull her face away and turn around in his arms to try to make her escape.