Page 126 of Obligation and Redemption

Elizabeth had never felt this way; somewhere deep inside, her body was encouraging her to lean over and kiss this man before her, her husband.

She had never actually kissed a man before.

The kiss that he had imposed upon her in her room at Longbourn gave her no pleasure, only disgust. How could she want to explore his touch again?

Elizabeth had firmly believed that she would never seek her husband’s physical presence in her life, and here she was, desiring just that.

She giggled as she considered that she very likely was carrying this man’s baby and yet had never enjoyed a true kiss of affection.

At his puzzled expression, she felt like she should say something and so began, “This is a strange situation in which we find ourselves. You want to kiss me, and I confess that I startlingly wish for you to do so, but neither of us is willing to make the move, despite your former liberties . Forgive me for my surprising speech, but I do enjoy the follies that present themselves in my life.”

Darcy smiled at her whimsical nature that had always diverted him, if he were to own it. “You are saying that I may kiss you?”

“Do you need my permission?”

“I am afraid that is exactly what I need, for I have set up an untenable situation for myself where I must receive your expressed approval before I enjoy any pleasures which my wife might deign to allow.”

“Such power I have! You mean to continue to punish yourself for something which I have given you my forgiveness.”

“But you said you will never forget. Nor shall I.” Darcy then looked away before continuing, “I will never forget the look of defeat and resentment you presented. I will endeavour to make the remembrance for you a distant one, and a recollection that is used to compare your present happiness, that it might add weight to your pleasure.”

“You have my permission.”

Darcy needed no other encouragement, but he was conscious of his own vulnerability, while Elizabeth could not believe her own daring. Was this really what she wanted?

Darcy leaned towards her slowly, giving her every opportunity to change her mind or turn away.

Instead, she leaned into him and met him part way.

Could this be the same woman who turned her head away in disgust?

Yes, she is the same woman; I’m just a different man.

He had begun to berate himself again for his previous treatment of her, but this thought was soon overcome by the exquisite pleasure which a pair of fine lips could bestow on the mouth of an inspirited recipient.

Then Darcy noticed a hint of rose and what else was it?

Some familiar spice? Did she wear this for me or does she always wear this scent, while I have missed it?

– Like so many other fine qualities. He breathed in deeply savouring her scent, her softness and her warmth.

There could be no comparison between the two kisses in which this couple had thus far shared.

The first had been painful for both, taken by force and with no redeeming intention or benefit.

Elizabeth had felt the full impact of the deliberate degradation and despised him for it, but not this time.

As his lips gently brushed her own an unexpected feeling of longing spread over her and inside of her.

The pleasure was short-lived as Darcy pulled back to look upon her face.

Could she have enjoyed the kiss as much as he?

He received his answer as she took hold of her lower lip within her teeth and glanced up into his eyes.

Then a becoming smile overspread her countenance.

“Can we count this as our first kiss? I did not participate in the last one, and this one was so much more delightful.”

His eyes danced, joining in her playfulness. “This is a new beginning for us, and as I do not believe that I am the same man I used to be, I would say ‘yes,’ and a perfect first kiss it was, too.”

“I would like to reward you.”

“For what?”

“For giving me a perfect first kiss, by giving you another.” She then leaned towards him, lip again ensconced between her teeth until the last moment when she released its hold and met his own.

This one lasted longer than the first, as each savoured the feeling of mutual pleasure and accord.

Darcy moved closer letting go of her hand and instead wrapping it around her back while the other continued to caress her face and neck.

Although near the fireplace, Elizabeth felt a shiver run down her spine that continued to tingle as her husband gently stroked her back.

Elizabeth had never felt the comfort and solace that she did while in the gentle embrace of her strong husband.

She knew he was a powerful man, not just physically but also socially and fiscally.

He could provide her with the comfort and security that all women, including herself, might desire, and he was holding her with a tenderness she longed for.

She could not have identified what exactly she was feeling towards him, but her regard and affection were now secure.

After a few moments of true bliss, Darcy pulled back and gazed into her eyes.

“Thank you, Elizabeth. You have made me very happy.” They stared at one another, not really knowing how to proceed, but Darcy, not wanting to ruin a good thing with more demands said, “Now perhaps I will have you at a disadvantage, making even the playing field.” At her lost look, he said, “Chess.”

She smiled as he moved to the opposite chair to take his place at the chessboard.

They played again, this time neither truly able to concentrate, both making nonsensical errors and then laughing at their blunders.

“Well, Darcy, you have sufficiently distracted me, which I thought might put us on equal footing, but now I see that neither of us is truly able to concentrate adequately to play in earnest. I will have to challenge you again and hope for better luck.”

“Whenever you would like to play, I would be happy to attempt the challenge. Now, you are looking rather sleepy, so I think it is time that you went to bed.”

“Thank you, Darcy, for keeping your promise and for allowing me to enjoy your company without fear of further… um, well, demands. Your patience means so much to me, and I hope that in so doing, you will find your reward.”

“I want what you want. Now, I must insist you go to your rest, so that we will be able to get in our early walk tomorrow. It promises to be a lovely day and the bulbs should be coming into full bloom.”

“I look forward to our walk then.”

“Perhaps, since it is getting warmer, we might consider a horse riding lesson, that is if you would like to. There are many areas of Pemberley that I would enjoy showing you, yet they are too far to be reached by foot, and the terrain is too difficult for a phaeton.” He looked at her hopefully, wanting her to agree but equally wanting her approval .

“We will talk about that tomorrow.” She hated to put him off, but was unsure if riding while with child was wise. Maybe she could put him off for another month until the baby has quickened and she could be sure of her joy.