Page 69 of June: Jess' Story

Eden squeals, and says “Maa!” when she sees me, drawing Alex’s attention with hers.

“Hi,” Alex says, looking sleep-worn and completely adorable. His hair is tousled, he’s got on gray lounge pants and a black t-shirt, and I have this urge to snap a photo of this moment. I don’t want to forget it.

“Hi!” Eden mimics him and I look at her, then back at him. It’s really her first word. Aside from Ma.

My eyes get a bit misty. I walk over and say, “Hi, sweet girl! You said hi!” I laugh. “Hi!” I say it again.

She replies with a “hi” back. Wow. Amazing. I hold up my phone and start a video.

“Hi, baby!” I say in the background and she responds.

“Hi!” She throws her fists down on her tray, sending Cheerios flying off and scattering the floor. I end the recording.

“That’s her first real word,” I say to Alex in awe.

“Wow,” he says with a smile beaming at me, and then back at Eden. “Looks like I’m a good influence already.” He laughs then offers the pouch to the babe. “Didn’t know if she still did bottles or milk now, so all she’s had is some cereal and a pouch you left in the fridge.”

“Thanks, you didn’t have to get up with her.”

“Yeah, I know,” he says as he helps her squeeze the bottom of the pouch.

Grabbing a bottle from the diaper bag, I find milk in the fridge and start filling it. Before I can even finish, Alex is at my back, wrapping his arms around me with his hands coming to rest on my hips. He places a soft kiss on my neck, making me break out into goosebumps.

“Morning.”

“Good morning,” I respond while screwing the bottle cap on. He pushes my hair over one shoulder and settles in. It’s these moments of vulnerability that I can’t shake. He can be so tender…and loving. It’s not what I pictured him to be like.

“Can I make you a coffee? Need to start learning how you take it…”I take it well. I’d like to take it nightly from now on, preferably from you, and in any hole.(Stahp it, Jessica.)

“Would love that. Splash of cream, please?”I’ll take him with a splash of cream.(I’m like a pubescent teen.)

He releases me so I can give Eden her bottle.

“When’d she get up?”

“About 5.” I check the clock to see it’s 7:30. Crap, they’ve been up for a while and I never even heard them. I must have actually slept like the dead. “So I wanted to talk to you about it last night, but didn’t get the chance,” Alex keeps talking while he puts a fresh pod in the Nespresso. I watch him, noting where the pods are at, and the coffee cups.

“Caleb’s coming for Thanksgiving and he’ll be staying here. So…”

I wait, not sure where this is headed. I push what little yogurt is left to the top of the pouch for Eden. “Sooo….” I giggle back, “Out with it.”

“You should probably just unpack in my room since you’ll be staying in there.”

Heat invades my cheeks, my stomach, and my panties. Yes, because people who are engaged and living together likely share a bedroom. Not mad about it. (Forced proximity for the win.)

“Okay, I will.” I shoot him a smile, all confidence to hide the fact that I want to ask him if he wants me there. Is this okay with him? Does he need some space? I’m starting to feel like he really wants me. Wantsme. But I also wonder if we’re falling together like this because of the circumstances.

Don’t know. And maybe, I don’t care.

He gives me a genuine looking smile back. “Also, I need you to make a grocery list. Things you and Eden will eat. I have to run out today, and I’ll pick up whatever we need.” I nod. “And then Brit wants us to bring a dish for Thanksgiving. Any thoughts? Requests?”

She texted Alex that, but not me.Things are worse than I imagined.

“Oh, sure. Let’s make sweet potato casserole.”

“Great. Just need the list of ingredients.”

“Can we come with you?” He gets a little look of surprise.