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“We don’t have any wine.”
“No, but we can get some. I’m sure Jason would be willing to pick up a bottle or two for us.”
I still didn’t get it. Even as we sat here on the couch and she did everything possible to drag me out of my shell, it was clear that we had nothing in common. Yet, she was here with me, being my friend when no one else in the world would come near me. Well, that wasn’t true. Eva came near me, but that was because she was family. Could I say the same if she wasn’t around?
My gaze flicked to Jason. He leaned against the counter, his long, muscular frame taking up so much space. He was so dominant and… I couldn’t think of the right word. There was this warning light going off in my head, telling me to stay away, that I would only get hurt. But the other half of my brain was telling me he was nothing like Zavala. I’d seen him interact with his little girl. I remembered the way he cared for me when he walked in on me after my lowest moment. A man like that wouldn’t hurt me.
He couldn’t.
I wanted so desperately to believe that he was nothing like Zavala, that I could trust a man again to be in my life and not have him ruin me. But they were alike in so many ways, and that had me backing away.
“Ready?” Jason asked.
I blinked up at him, completely caught off guard. “I haven’t paid.”
“It’s taken care of.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, I took care of it.”
“But it’s my furniture.”
He shrugged like it was no big deal, but it was. I shoved to my feet, my heart pounding in my chest as I stared at him. My fists clenched together as I fought to say the words. Would he hit me? Zavala would have the second I got angry.
Do this for yourself.
I took a calming breath and gathered up the courage. “While I appreciate that you convinced the man to sell the furniture, I need to pay for it myself.”
“I only?—”
“It’s mine! I need this,” I snapped, nearly losing it. I closed my eyes, fighting back the panic. Oh, God. He was going to hit me. I knew it. I could practically feel his fist swinging at me, the whoosh of air just before impact. A dizzying feeling washed over me as I started to hyperventilate.
But just then, I felt his fingers brush over my clenched fist. My fingers were pried open until his gently intertwined with mine.
My eyes flew open and I stared into his chocolate eyes, focusing solely on them. He breathed deeply, then released that breath, squeezing my hand in the process. I blinked, taking a ragged breath with him, then releasing it. Again, he squeezed my hand.
Over and over, he stayed with me, breathing with me until I calmed down. He hadn’t hit me. He hadn’t gotten upset. He just…stood there with me. I swallowed hard as tears burned my eyes with humiliation.
I ducked my head, no longer able to look him in the eye after yelling at him, then having a breakdown. But he didn’t let me hide. His fingers lifted my chin once again and he didn’t let go until I opened my eyes.
“What did I tell you about looking away from men?”
His words were soft yet strong, reminding me that I shouldn’t cower to anyone.
“I paid together so it would be faster. I’m sorry. Would you like to write me a check?”
Though my heart had calmed to a normal pace, words still escaped me, so I jerked my head up and down in some semblance of a nod.
“Okay. Ready to go? Or do you have something else you want to get?”
I was pretty sure I had embarrassed myself enough for one day. “We should go.”
He turned and walked away, leaving me alone with Vira, who I had completely forgotten was even here. She sauntered over to me, fanning herself.
“Girl, I feel like I just watched a porno.”
My gaze jerked to hers in confusion. “What?”