Page 52

W hat the fuck did I do? I let the love of my life and the mother of my children drive the fuck out of my life again. This was the dumbest thing I had ever done. I knew I wasn’t ready to let her ass go so why not just cool off before I packed up here stuff?

“Y’all need to cut this out. If love anything like y’all doing, I’ll just keep fucking these bitches for forty dollars,” Boogie said.

“I love her ass, man. Even with all the shit I know, I still love her.”

“She’s not a bad woman she just been in some fucked up situations. You don’t love her for no reason. She loves you too but after this, I don’t think you’ll ever get her back. I’m not married or nothing but you don’t put a woman out. I told your ass to think the shit through first.”

“I fucked up. I really fucked up, Boogie.”

I had come back to the house earlier to bring her something to eat but she wasn’t there.

Kani got a little fussy so I needed up feeding him and laying him in his bed.

After taking a piss and washing my hands I noticed a stick wrapped in tissue inside of her basket where she kept her feminine products.

When I read the word positive on the stick, I lost my damn mind.

I knew we had slept together a few times but all I could think about was the baby being someone else’s.

Boogie did try to calm me down, but I was too far gone.

Love had me feeling crazy and I still wasn’t sure how to love correctly but when it came to Blessyn, I’ll do whatever.

I answered my brothers call as headed towards Blessyn’s house.

“Perc right now ain’t the time.”

“Nigga you better make time.”

“Fuck going on?”

“Your apartment complex just been set on fire. Not only that but mama house on fire right now too.”

“Man fuck!” I hit the steering wheel. “I can’t focus on one thing at a time ‘cause folks keep fucking with me. Shit!”

“I’ll go to mama house; you go to the apartments. We’ll meet up afterwards.”

“You know where Blessyn stays?”

“Fuck you mean do I know where she stays? At your house nigga.”

“Nah, I put her out. Just meet me over there when you done.”

“Did you say you out here out? You must’ve blacked out for a minute ‘cause ain’t no way you out your ex-wife out of her house.”

“Nigga meet me later,” I hung up the phone and got off on the first exit to head back to the apartments.

The same person was doing this shit. I was too busy dealing with my love life and being a father to deal with any of this street shit.

That’s why I left this shit behind so I could start a family, and nothing threaten my home.

It seemed like every week it was some bullshit going on and it only caused more tension in my love life.

I couldn’t even get out of my truck while I watched them fight the big ass flames that consumed the project that I put my heart into.

This wasn’t just any type of complex. It was a place I was going to open for my niggas that was coming home and couldn’t find a place to live because of their record.

It was personal to me and whoever was doing this, knew it was personal.

It took them two hours to put the fire out.

I didn’t even want to talk to no damn body after this shit.

I wanted to pack up and move my family away from Atlanta just so I could get some type of peace.

Unlike Blessyn’s fire, I was told that mine was an electrical problem, and it wasn’t intentional.

Mighty crazy that my shit on fire and so was my mama’s.

“Where you at?” I asked Perc as I pulled away from the scene.

“I’m sitting outside of Blessyn house.”

“Is she there?” I asked.

“Nah, not that I know of.”

“Was she at her mama house?”

“Nigga how I know? You ain’t tell me to go there, you said come here.”

“My bad. I’m on the way.”

I hung up with him and dialed Blessyn’s number but she didn’t answer.

This was one of the reasons I hated being in the city.

I was closer to her mama house than I was to hers.

Blessyn’s car sat in the driveway behind her mamas.

It was late but I needed to see her. I had to apologize for my actions and if she never wanted to fuck with me again, at least she’ll know I was sorry.

Me: Come out the door please.

I waited on her for twenty minutes before she dragged her ass out the door. Perc had called and snapped on me for having him waiting but I didn’t want to leave until I talked to her. She stood in the driveway waiting for me to get out of my car.

“Can we talk in the car? It’s kind of cold out here?”

“I really don’t care. Why can’t you leave me the fuck alone? You’ve humiliated the hell out of me too many times today. It’s late and Kani is going to be waking up for a bottle soon.”

“I know but I gotta make it right. I’m sorry for overreacting.

I really fucked up this time and I can understand if you never speak to me again.

My love for you is real. When I can’t have you, it does something to me.

I’m still trying to understand why you can’t love me back.

Obviously, we have something if you are carrying child number two. ”

“It ain’t that I don’t love you. I do. If I didn’t then us talking right now wouldn’t be going on.”

“Why Capone then? You started feeling that nigga and was gon’ give my pussy away.”

“You got to stop thinking everything is about you because it’s not. I decided to talk to Capone because he listens to me. He understands that I’m a woman and we deal with shit daily. Capone never tried to sleep with me. What we have is so unhealthy and you know it. We have sex and we at it again.”

I leaned against her mama car and tried to pull her into me, but she pushed me off and crossed her arms. She wouldn’t even look at me. Blessyn was my heart, but I didn’t know what else to do to get her back. Listening to her tell me about Capone made me feel like I wasn’t doing anything right.

“What do I need to do? You pregnant again, Bless. I’m not going to live without my family. We supposed to still be married like why still fuck with me and not want to be with me?”

“There’s nothing you can do now. You let me know how you felt when all my stuff was on the lawn. That hurt me like no other. The Savannah bitch didn’t mean shit, the murder of my baby daddy didn’t mean shit once I knew the whole story. But you putting me out, told me everything I needed to know.”

“I’m a nigga. You don’t think we hurt too?

I watched you sit in a fuckin’ restaurant with a nigga and ignore every one of my calls.

He ain’t doing shit to you that I didn’t and won’t do.

It’s never been a time I haven’t listened to you.

Just say you wanted something new instead of continuing to lie to me. Why didn’t you tell me ‘bout Joel?”

“He was my problem. He just popped back up and I got nervous.”

“When I ask you to let me handle things, let me do it. If I’mma be here let me take all that dumb shit away from you.

He could’ve been handled without you stealing from me.

Be honest with me too. I never lie to you.

When you asked me ‘bout Savannah, I told you the honest truth. I don’t like to be lied to.

It makes me start treating you different. ”

“I’m sorry about that and I’ll replace all of it when I get back to work.”

“I ain’t worried ‘bout the shit now. Just to make shit clear, I’m not in the drug game but the dope you stole belonged to my brother for hard times.

We had to kill Joel ‘cause he was starting to flood the streets and get high off our shit. He was making himself hot and he ain’t stable enough to stand up against a cop interrogating him.

I can’t take no chances of a muthafucka taking me away from y’all. ”

“I’m truly sorry about that. I did not set him up though. He probably told you his side and didn’t tell the truth.”

“I don’t wanna know shit. We both did shit when we were younger. Neither one of us is perfect but we trying to live past all the shit we done. He’s gone and now I gotta figure out who setting all my shit on fire.”

“What are you talking about?”

“My apartments caught on fire tonight and then my mama house was on fire too. I’ve been so busy trying to get you back that people think they can play with me and I’m tired of the shit now. I want you and Kani to go out of town or something. Like find you somewhere you always wanted to go and go.”

“I can’t do that with Merci still missing. My mama can’t even sleep at night. She is sitting in the living room now with your niece eating damn popcorn.”

“I gotta put y’all somewhere. If someone after me, they’ll hurt y’all. I really believe that what’s going on with your sister.”

“Please don’t say that.”

“Me and Perc done some fucked up shit in our day. Karma ain’t pretty and she comes back to take out everybody. I want y’all safe.”

“I don’t know where to go.”

“I got a spot in the mountains. Y’all can go there.”

“I’m not going to no damn mountains. We will be fine right here at my mama house.”

As much as I wanted to argue with Blessyn I couldn’t because I knew she wasn’t going anywhere while Merci was missing. All I could do is pray that no one was dumb enough to touch my family again. I grabbed Blessyn by her shirt and pulled her without her fighting this time.

“I love you so much. If it was up to me, I would marry you again and we’ll move so far from this city. Can we just get back to how we were? You don’t have to move back in the house, hell if you want to, I’ll buy you a new one.”

“I don’t want a house, Lucky. It was never about the money with you. I loved you for showing me that I could love again. The sex with you is bomb as fuck and you treat me and Kani like royalty. We can start out as friends again without the benefits.”

“So, I can’t choke you while you ride this dick? Damn what I supposed to do? My dick hard right now. We can hop in my truck and get this shit off real quick.” I started pulling her towards the truck.

“Seriously Lucky?”

“What? I’ll make it quick before Kani wake up.”

I hit the unlock button on my truck and opened the door for her. This was her Escalade but she didn’t want it, so I took that bitch and fixed it up with some rims and televisions. It was my truck I jumped in when I didn’t feel like catching any attention.

“You can go in there and get my son and we can go home and fuck. I don’t give a damn where we do it at.”

I sat Blessyn on lap and kissed her neck.

She was the finest woman I had ever laid eyes.

It was something about her that made me not want to ever give another woman my all.

Blessyn was going to be the woman in life even if we weren’t together.

She had the type of hold on me and it was hard to explain to anyone.

“I love you. You know that, right?”

“I love you too.”

A tap on the window stopped me from pulling Blessyn’s shirt over her head.

“Let the window down it may be my mama with the baby.”

“She doesn’t know we in here. I paid good money for my tint to be this dark. Do you know how many tickets I don’t got ‘bout this shit.”

“Lucky.”

“Goddamnit, a nigga can’t even bust a nut in this bitch.”

I leaned up to start the truck and Blessyn let the back window down. The sound of a gun cocking and going off. Blessyn was slumped and her blood was splatter all over my backseat. The masked man raised his gun at me and squeezed the trigger twice.

“Long live Khi!”