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I squeezed my big ass in a pair of tight and threw a shirt on with some slides.

Merci had called me and told me what happened to her.

I felt bad because her and my mama was blowing my phone up, but I was too busy going through my own shit that I didn’t give a damn about anyone else.

Now I was feeling bad that my sister had lost her baby and Perc was locked up so I needed to go and check on the shop.

I slept on the shit Lucky told me and it had some truth to it.

Khi was being selfish by trying to prove a point with our son in the car.

How was Lucky to know he was in the backseat?

I still blamed Lucky but Khi had a big part of the shit too.

The best way for me to deal with it is to divorce Lucky and try to figure out how we were going to raise our son together without us feeling awkward or at odds with one another.

I didn’t want any beef with him but there was nothing else to hold on to.

I had planned on moving back to my spot but then thought about it, why move back to my place when my son’s whole life was right here?

I got to the hospital only to see Lucky’s ass in the room with Merci.

“I tried calling you but you never answer,” Merci stated.

“I left my phone at home.”

“Why you here?” Lucky asked but I ignored him. “You can’t hear?”

“Ain’t my sister here?” I said with an attitude. “Okay then, that’s why I’m here. She asked me to take her home.”

“I’m here to take her home because my brother asked me to. You can gon’ back to your hole.”

“Really? Y’all gon’ do this shit in front of me? After what the fuck just happen to me and y’all wanna argue?” Merci voice cracked.

“My bad Merci. Here let me help you,” I helped her into the wheelchair. “Where is mama?”

“She’s at my condo getting all the baby stuff out before I get there. I don’t want to be like you. Not trying to ruffle any feathers and all but the quicker I get over this, the faster I can move on with my life. I’m still young and I can have more babies.”

“See, I like your way of thinking,” Lucky said.

“Nigga you murdered a child. That’s not something you can move on from,” I spat.

“Not here and not now,” Merci told us. “Y’all need to sit down and talk this shit out because y’all married now and my nephew will be here soon and I don’t want him coming into this toxic ass shit y’all got going on. Either get back to loving each other or move on.”

“I’ll take moving on for five hundred please,” I said rolling my eyes.

“Fuck outta here. Move your ass to another bedroom. That’s ‘bout all the moving you gon’ be doing. You are carrying my last name,” Lucky said.

“Whatever. I’ll meet you at your condo,” I told Merci.

Since I was ahead of them by twenty minutes, I decided to stop by the shop to see who the hell was in charge since Perc wasn’t there. I was slapped in the damn face with a closed sign. My shop was never closed on the busiest day of the fucking week.

“Blessyn what the fuck goin’ on with the shop? Streets say Perc got popped for killing his baby mama,” one of my clients asked.

“We both know Perc but I don’t give a damn what the streets said. Perc will be home soon. That girl murdered my damn niece and got my sister face fucked up,” one of our usual customers said.

“Lexus had this shit coming tho. She was always fucking with that man.”

“Give me a day and I’ll have the shop back open for y’all. Watch out for me and make sure don’t nobody try no bullshit.”

“I got you Blessyn.”

I headed to Merci’s condo to help get her settled in before I took my ass back home to waddle in my problems. Lucky just wouldn’t leave me the fuck alone.

All he had to do was drop my sister off and take his ass on but no, he was up in the condo helping my mama move shit around like he was the best son in law in the world.

I rolled my eyes at him before greeting my mama.

“Hey mama.”

“Hey baby. How are you feeling since you don’t know how to answer the phone? I just made Lucky give me his number so I can keep in touch with you.”

“You don’t have to worry about calling him to check on me.”

“What does that mean?”

“I told you she been talking crazy,” Lucky said.

“Is this about Khi and Kason? He already told me about it.”

Now I really had a fucking attitude. He didn’t give me a chance to have the conversation with my mama first now she only has his side of the story.

“Girl, stop standing there and go in the room with your sister and help her. Ain’t nothing you can do in here,” my mama brushed me off.

Merci was climbing in her bed when I walked in. She was doing better than I thought she would be doing. Maybe I was just too emotional and Merci was really the strong one.

“How are you holding up?” I asked, climbing in the bed with her.

“I’m better than I thought. Tomorrow I may feel different but right now I’m okay. Ready to get back to work.”

“I wish I had your strength.”

“You keep yourself in those self-pity parties. Girl, I can’t do that shit. My fucking vibe too lit to be crying and shit all day. As soon as my six weeks up bitch, I’m back outside.”

“What about Perc? Are you worried about him at all?”

“Yeah, as soon as I’m able to go and see him, I will. As far as me and him goes, it will never be. I don’t give a fuck if he killed that bitch or not.”

“He really loves you, though.”

“And Lucky loves you but that didn’t stop you from filing a divorce, right?”

“You’re right.”

“Aight, let me do me.”

It seemed to me like everyone had their life figured out but me. When she went to sleep, I got out the bed and went back to the living room. My intentions were to leave but my mama stopped me and wanted me to stay while she cooked us both some dinner. Lucky was gone so I didn’t have to rush off.

“Are you really going to divorce that man? He makes you so happy. You haven’t smiled so hard since Kason got killed.”

“Would you stay with a man that pulled the trigger on your only child?” I questioned.

“Do you know he takes meds for anxiety and depression? Do you know that he visits Kason once a week? That’s more than you. I just want you to see that you are not the only one suffering from the loss of my grandson. He’s suffered too. It may take the both of you to heal together.”

“Mama I’m not you. You let daddy do what he wanted and I’m not that chick. Please don’t take that the wrong way.”

“I’m no longer with him anymore. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do but I’ve felt better since I packed all his shit and put him out.

I don’t know where he is or what he’s doing.

It’s not my business. He never loved me.

He told me he did but his actions said something else.

But what I’m telling you is, Lucky made a mistake and he’s dealing with it as best as he knows how.

He can barely make it without you. He worships the ground you walk on.

He’s been waiting for the perfect woman and here you come into his life and now you ready to snatch it away. ”

“I’m going through with it. I’m sorry that it’s against what you think but this is my life.”

“You’re right. I’ll leave it alone. Just don’t regret it.”