Page 73 of Alexander: Alexander's Story

Love you too

“You wanna walk?” I ask Delta, sliding my phone back into my pocket. He spins around in a circle, his tail wagging. That’s a yes. “Alright, let’s go.” I grab his lead but leave it off so he can roam free.

We opt for the path down to the cove and head towards the lake. Emma and I don’t go every day like we used to. She’s been tired the last couple of times I tried to wake her. I smile at thememory of her arms stretched overhead, baring her stomach in that cropped tee she wears to bed.

Damn, I miss her already.

I don’t have enough cell signal on the trail, but the idea is there to check flights when I get back from the walk. Hell, maybe I’ll even drive and surprise her.

Delta starts picking up speed as we get closer until I can’t see him anymore, but I can hear him barking, loud, with alarm.

Picking up the pace, I jog to catch up but stop dead in my tracks when I round the last bend.

No.

Sitting on the boulder — mine and Emma’s boulder — is Jess. Looking terrified of my rabid-looking dog.Shit.

“Delta, heel.” He stops baring his teeth. “Sit.” He takes a seat, and I slip the lead around his neck.

“Sorry.” It’s short, and I turn Delta and I around to leave.

“Wait!” The thought,don’t wait, is there, but it’s overridden by everything I try to keep repressed.

I turn around to face her, andI hate it.

Hate how fucking beautiful she is. Her hair has grown out since I saw her last year. It’s longer and wavy, whipping around in the wind. Fucking teasing me.

She’s wearing hardly any makeup, and with the wind coming in my direction, I can smell her perfume, unlocking memories I’ve pushed to the furthest edges of my mind.

“Hey, Jess,” I say when she doesn’t say anything. She starts climbing off the boulder to stand closer while keeping plenty of space between her and Delta. “He doesn’t bite, just a bit protective, and sometimes an asshole, is all.” She nods.

“Are you talking about you…or the dog?” She gives me a slight smile. I try to return it, but it’s hard. Always hard with her.

“The dog.”

She nods awkwardly again. “Y-you look really good, Alex.” She’s nervous. Strange to see her like this.

“Thanks, I am good.” I hope it stings. I hope even just a fraction of the sting I felt when I opened that fucking invitation.

“Good.” Her eyes widen with surprise before sliding down to check the ring on my finger. It’s always there. I never take it off. Not in the shower, not working out. It’s there as a reminder. A constant one.

I don’t let my eyes stray, but I know she wears a ring now, too. A big gaudy one, like Damian needed the world to see it from space. Hope she likes it.

“I actually came down here, hoping I’d run into you.” My heartbeat races. “Brit said you come down here a lot.”

I nod, chewing on the inside of my cheek, an old nervous habit rising from the dead.

“I just wanted to, I guess…see if you’re happy. And that…nothing’s changed. For you.”The fuck is she getting at?“Because sometimes I wonder…if you only did it to prove a point…and if you regret it?” She’s looking down at her feet now. I don’t regret a single second spent with Emma. I don’t think I ever would.

Without her, I would have ceased to exist.

“I don’t regret it, no.” I don’t tell Jess the whole story. She’s also not asking. Out of nowhere, Delta starts growling at Jess, sensing that someone is encroaching on Emma’s territory. “Delta, no,” I command harshly, and he stops with a whimper. “Sorry,” I apologize.

“Yeah…” She finally looks up, “If-” she starts, then stops. “If you ever-” she sighs. “This is your last chance…if you want to change things.” I stare at her.Is she fucking kidding?

“I’m married, Jess.” Her cheeks turn crimson, and I run my hand over my beard to hide any reaction.

“I know, but I can’t help but think the marriage isn’t actually real. And I guess…I don’t want any regrets when I walk down the aisle in June.” She moves her hands inside the sleeves of her sweatshirt, the anxiousness showing. “So I just want to be sure because…I got your note. On the prenup. And I haven’t stopped thinking about it since.” The post-it note I’d scribbled in my lawyer’s office in haste.I’ve always and only ever loved you, Jess.