Page 88 of The Compass Series

Connor went above and beyond to help me with the move. When I tried to talk him out of hiring movers for me, he told me he wouldn’t take no as an answer. “It’s a good reason to get together for an interview session,” he’d said, giving me an excuse to have him help me pack up my boxes.

I took him up on the offer. The sooner the boxes were packed, the sooner I could be out of Jason’s place.

“You’re a collector,” Connor commented, taking my snow globe collection off the bookshelves in the living room.

I looked up from the box of dishes I had sitting on the kitchen countertop. “I like things to look back on. Each snow globe has a story behind it.”

He arched an intrigued brow as he lifted one. “Where’s this one from?”

After setting the plate inside the box, I walked over to Connor and took the snow globe from his hand. It was a woman sitting at a desk writing. My lips turned up at the memory that came rushing back to me.

“I got this one the day I graduated from college with my journalism degree.” I placed the snow globe into the box.

“What about this one?” he asked, lifting up another globe.

The moment I saw it, my smile evaporated. I took it from Connor and stared at it. There were two ice skaters at Rockefeller Center right in front of the Christmas tree. I shook the snow globe and watched the snowflakes fall over the couple.

“Jason got it for me after his family took me ice skating for the first time,” I explained.

I walked over to the trash bin in the kitchen and tossed it inside.

“I’d rather not hold on to that. Plus, looking back, it was actually his mom who pressured him to get it for me. He didn’t even spend his money on it.”

Connor crossed his arms. “For some reason, that doesn’t surprise me. His parents are gems.”

“Yeah. I figured over time, he could become more like them. Are you two close? You and Jason?” I asked. I’d been wondering about their relationship and about Connor’s thoughts on the subject since it took place.

He laughed. “Close? No, not at all. Jason and I haven’t always seen eye to eye. Not only on the business side of things but on the lifestyle side, too.”

“Everyone said he was a party animal before me.”

“That’s true.”

“I don’t know why I thought he’d change for me…I don’t know why I thought I’d be the one to tame him, but when we were together at first, it seemed real. He seemed really into me. He gave me all of his time and attention at the beginning.”

“Love bombing—it’s one of his specialties with his new girls. He floods them with time and attention, making them feel like they are the most important thing in his world. Then, he slowly starts to shit on them, making them feel unworthy of him.”

I huffed. “So I was just another one of his targets. His whole persona changed when we moved in together.”

“A fraud can only hide its true colors for so long. The mask always falls off.”

Before I could reply, my cell phone began ringing, and Katherine’s name popped up on the screen. “Hello?”

“Hi, Aaliyah, it’s me, Katherine. From downstairs,” she whispered, making me snicker a little.

“Yes, I know. Your name popped up on my screen. What’s going on? Why are you whispering?”

“Oh, because I don’t want anyone to hear me, but I needed you to know Jason is on his way up to you. Like he’s on the elevator. Like, right now.”

I stood straighter, alert. “What?”

“I just wanted to give you a heads-up since I know you’re packing and all and—oh! Got to go.” She hung up the phone, leaving me there as if I were a deer in headlights.

“What is it?” Connor asked.

“Jason…he’s here. He’s on his way up now.” I locked eyes with him, alarm shooting out of every inch of me. “You need to go.”

“What? Where?”

“I don’t know, but you being here will just make it awkward. And I’m freaking out and sweating, and I, uh, I don’t know. Can you go into, like, the spare bedroom for a bit? Because I can’t face him and then also have him asking why you’re here. It’s all too much.”

Without any more commentary, he headed to the spare room and closed the door behind him.

Within seconds, the front door opened, and I was face-to-face with the man who’d stood me up on the most important day of my life. As he stood there, staring at me, he looked weak. Pathetic. Like someone I never truly knew.

“Hi,” he said as he crossed his arms. “What’s up?”

What’s up?

That was what he decided his first words to me in person should be? My blood began to boil as anger built up inside me. I had thought I would crumple the moment I saw him. I’d thought I’d fall apart and cry. Instead, I felt an intense amount of irritation.

“You didn’t tell me you were coming here,” I said.

“I know. I figured it might be best if I just surprised you by stopping by. My mom told me you were moving out today, and well…” He raked his hand through his hair. “Do you really think that’s a good idea?”

“Are you kidding me? Why in the world would I stay?”

“I don’t know, Aaliyah. This just seems pretty sudden, that’s all.”

He was talking as if I’d upped and decided to walk out on our relationship, as if I’d made a rushed decision to move on with my life.

“Jason, what in the hell are you talking about? You called off our wedding. There’s nothing sudden about me moving out. Honestly, I should’ve been gone a long time ago.”

“You don’t have to raise your voice.”

“I’m not raising my voice!” I snapped, clearly heightening my vocals at that very moment.

“See why I didn’t reach out to you after calling things off? I knew you would react like this,” he muttered.

“React like what? You know what, I don’t even know why we are having this conversation. It doesn’t matter. I’m moving on, and I’m assuming you’re doing the same. So, if you’d excuse me, I’d like to finish packing so I can get out of your place.”

“What if we didn’t, though?”

“Didn’t what?”

“Move on?”

My chest tightened. What in the world was he talking about?

He took a step toward me. “Aaliyah?—”

“Stop,” I scolded, holding my hand up in front of me. “Don’t come closer.”

“Why do you have to be so dramatic all the time?”

“Excuse me?”

“You’re acting super emotional for no reason. Yeah, I messed up, and I get that, but that doesn’t give you a reason not to give me another chance.”

Was he drunk? High? Did he really believe there was any part of me that would want to give him another chance at hurting me again after he left me? I wanted to curse him out. I wanted to yell, and I wanted to scream, but I didn’t. I didn’t want to give him any more of me. I wanted it to be over.

“Jason, I’m going to finish packing, you’re going to move on with your life, and I’m going to do the same.”

“We took care of you,” he said. “When you couldn’t do things, my family had your back, not to mention the bills for your?—”

“I get it, okay? Your family has gone above and beyond for me, and I’m grateful—but you can’t toss that in my face. I never asked for any of what you’ve done for me. If needed, I’ll pay all the money back.”

“As if you have the time to pay it back. It would take you years.”

Those words were meant to cut me deep, and they did. Just another reminder of time and how mine was limited, another strike to my soul that I’d spent my precious time on the planet getting into bed with someone like him.

“You and I are done,” I said, not showing the emotion he’d come so close to pulling out of me.

He stared for a second, studying every inch of me. He was waiting for it to happen, waiting for me to crack, but I wouldn’t. I couldn’t give him what he’d come for. It was as if he derived pleasure from watching me ache, so I stood strong.

“Your loss,” he said coldly. How had I ever thought that man was who I wanted to spend forever with?

He was a monster. I’d climbed into bed with a monster simply because I was afraid of lying alone.

“I should’ve never even listened to my mom about coming over here today. I knew it was a lost cause.”

“Your mother told you to come here?” Why would she do that? Especially after I told her it was best to cut ties? A last-ditch effort to try to get me to change my mind?

“Yeah. She tried to pressure me to get back together with you and?—”

“Do you love me, Jason?”

He paused and arched an eyebrow. “Why would you ask that?”

“Because it appears you were trying to please your mother by being with me.”

He shrugged his shoulders. “She wanted you and me to be a thing more than I ever wanted us to happen. She thought you’d be good for me. That’s why she pushed it so much and offered me…” His words faded, leaving me wondering where his thought was going.

“Offered you what?”

“It doesn’t matter. It wasn’t even worth it. Clearly, this is over. Good luck with whatever kind of life you have left. Leave my key in the foyer.” He turned and left, slamming the door behind him. Even though he left, his words still struck me hard.

Whatever kind of life you have left.

At that moment, I felt nothing but regret for wasting more than a year of my life with that man. I couldn’t believe I’d ever fallen into his arms. The truth was, I had only stayed because I loved his parents. I loved the idea of family. I loved feeling as if I were a part of something concrete.

I’d fallen in love with a lie in order to hold on to the idea of fake dreams coming true.

“You okay?” Connor said, coming into the living room.

I turned to face him and nodded. “I hate him.”

“Good because I do, too.”