Page 48 of I’m Fine Save Me (The Spiral Duet #1)

Chapter thirty-two

Tegan

One Month Later

A fter two weeks Cooper finally started talking again. He’d gone to therapy only a few days after the incident with Wayne and the usual dark cloud loomed afterward.

Over the last couple of weeks he’s become more like his old self. I think maybe there was an adjustment to his medication because he’s less hazy than he’s been over the last couple of years.

I’ve watched him set up the kiddie pool in the front yard, and enjoyed lounging in the sun while he and Hannah splashed around in the summer sun. That cloud has finally dispersed completely the more time he spends with her.

He goes to work, does the job, goes into the shed out back to play drums for a few hours, and then he helps me clean up the kitchen after dinner. Over the last two weeks he’s even made love to me with no planning or preamble.

I’m still not sure what sort of breakthrough he had at therapy, but I’m not about to push my luck by forcing him to talk about it. Like I told Morgan, I’ll cherish the good days and burn them into my soul.

Wayne has been silent over the last month. I’m guessing when the police didn’t show up, he decided that it was best if I’m the one to come to him.

I’m not going to.

I do entertain myself with the thought of him thinking he’s somehow won though. I might not have pressed charges.

I might not be able to get a solid restraining order against him; but I know he’ll never pick up my daughter from school again. The people that I trust with her will never hand her over to him. So my fear of him taking her from me is not going to haunt me.

Cooper and Hannah are in the shed where he’s sitting on a chair with his guitar and she’s sitting at his drum set. I love when he has a random week day off and chooses to keep her home from school. She’s tapping one of the sticks against the snare while he plucks away at the strings.

For a while after the gun incident, he couldn’t figure out how to play his guitar anymore.

His left hand unable to move along the neck or press hard enough along the fret to get the chord just right, he’d thought he wouldn’t be able to play again.

Even with the nerve damage in two fingers, he’s recovered the ability and I love to hear him jam out when he’s in a good mood.

Days like today are precious, especially when Hannah shows an interest in the instruments.

“You two okay back here?” My little girl beams and nods emphatically as she goes back to tapping, testing the volume of each beat.

My husband crooks a finger to beckon me over, and I don’t hesitate to go to him, bend down, and give him a gentle kiss. “We’re good, gorgeous. What about you?”

I smile and press another kiss to his lips, savoring the feeling of such a simple intimacy.

“Mm. I was about to call Lo and then maybe talk to Morgan for a bit if you two were still out here enjoying your jam session.” A smile tugs at my husband’s lips and he nods.

“You’re not supposed to call him for another hour. ”

I lift my brow at that. My men talk, I know that, but I seem to have stumbled upon a setup. Cooper reads the look and a full grin blooms across his handsome face.

“I’m taking the drum queen over there to that new playground they built downtown, and then we’re going— where was it, Little Bit?”

“Swirls, Deddy. Swa-irls!” Hannah declares like she’s reminded him a million times already, making us both laugh.

“That’s right, Swirls.”

Cooper snaps his fingers and taps his temple, putting on a show of committing it to memory this time. It works in his favor, since our daughter instantly smiles at him and goes back to her experimental beats.

“I figured she’ll have fun with frozen yogurt and the thousand toppings they have.

I’ve got everything in the car and ready just in case.

You can probably tell that she and I have talked about it a lot to get her ready for the experience.

” There’s pride in his eyes as he lays it all out for me.

“We even watched some videos the place posted online so she knows what to expect.”

Smiling, I bend down to kiss him again, not wanting him to think the sheen of tears in my eyes is anything to worry about. Cooper is an amazing father, and he understands our daughter on a level that maybe I never will.

“I guess I’ll go call Lo since she’ll likely talk for that whole hour.” We both smile and he kisses me again before I pull away to go give Hannah a kiss on top of her head.

On my way out, Cooper gently grabs my wrist and pulls me back to him. He stands and kisses my temple before whispering against my ear. “She’ll be ready for a nap when I get her back home. I’ll put her down for her nap, so you just stay however he leaves you, hm?”

My skin heats and my core throbs at the suggestion. Nodding my head, I feel him smile against my ear before he nips the lobe and lets me go.

“Tell Lo I said hi.”

I go inside and prop the phone up on the counter as it rings for a FaceTime with the woman who is quickly becoming a long distance best friend.

After my breakdown with Morgan, she and I had talked the following day and it felt so—natural to just open up to her. Of course she doesn’t know the full details, but to have someone on team fuck Wayne with a rusty spork , her words not mine, is a thing in my life I didn’t know I needed.

I know my guys can’t stand my biological father. My sisters have their own battles with him, and our mother tries her best not to influence our opinions of him. Lorene had a similar toxic parent in her mother, so we’ve sort of bonded over their behaviors.

I’m chugging a glass of ice water when she pops up on the screen looking like she’s getting ready for a day date.

Lo is married, but has an open marriage, and she’s adventurous as fuck.

I might role play with guys on the internet and have had my share of long distance relationships, but I am so jealous of Lorene’s free spirit.

She meets guys on not just dating apps, but social media too. She also has the time of her life. I love hearing every story from the growers to the showers to the ones that didn’t work out. There’s no drama for the most part, and she’s always ready to give the juicy details.

“Thirsty?” she chimes and I smirk against the rim of the glass. “Ooooohhh that’s a flustered face!” she giddily proclaims and puts her makeup brush down, leaning into the screen.

Rolling my eyes, I refill the glass and pick up my phone to walk back to my bedroom.

God knows I don’t need Cooper overhearing girl talk.

He’s come on screen during my FaceTimes and Zoom calls a couple of times.

He’s always wearing his emotional mask though.

It’s that happy go lucky front he puts on for strangers, but I’ve noticed him being more himself when it’s just Lo on the phone.

“Cooper decided to get me all hot and bothered right before I called you. Morgan is expecting a call from me after I hang up with you.”

It feels amazing to be able to openly talk about both of my guys without judgement. I would never be able to explain my relationship or marriage to my family. They’ll likely never know about the amazing second man in my life that I’ve fallen in love with.

I haven’t even told them about Lorene.

The one time I mentioned that I had a friend online, they all gave me skeptical looks and asked if I had ever met her in person.

When my response was “not yet” everyone raised their brows, then told me not to get murdered before changing topics.

I’ve since learned not to bring it up. I’ll put it in the little box of things I only discuss with my guys.

“Oh so you’re getting Daddy time today? Nice.” Lo grins and goes back to finishing her makeup. “And you look like you’re getting ready to meet someone new,” I point out. “You only do the white eyeliner when you’re making those baby blues pop to make you look all innocent.”

With a mischievous smile, she puts on some gloss and then stands to walk into her closet.

I prop myself up against the headboard and watch as she tosses out three outfits.

Over the last month, I’ve helped her pick her date outfit twice.

With this only being the third time, I’m shocked at how normal it feels.

It’s like she and I have known each other our entire lives and this is just what we do.

“Don’t even try on the red one. It clashes with the eyeshadow you did.

” Without argument, she puts that outfit back into the closet.

She soon steps back out with two pairs of heels.

Lorene is curvy like me. We both have done well with our weight loss, and I love seeing her grow even more conviction in her clothing choices.

Her personality seems to have always allowed her the confidence to wear whatever the fuck she wants; but I can tell how much fun she has when she can shop for smaller sizes.

Once we’ve decided on the outfit, she gets dressed while she talks. This guy is named Darren and she met him on Snapchat. They’ve exchanged several conversations and pictures, obviously she thinks he’s hot. They’re meeting at a local bar for a trivia event.

She shows me pictures and he’s definitely easy on the eyes. “I think he’s going to be a dud though. He’s too pretty and talks too easily. I’m pretty sure I’m going to show up and he’s that type that can only sexy flirt in texts.”

I almost choke on my water at that.

“Mark my words, Tegs. I’m gonna be texting you later. You’ll be bowlegged from fucking and I’ll be pouting to Liam about how disappointed I am.”

“Well, if you go into it thinking like that , you picky bitch…” I chide her playfully and she smiles.

“Fine. I’m manifesting a good dicking down with lots of dirty talk.” Lo declares. “That better, Mrs. Sunshine and rainbows?”

I can’t help my smile.