Page 42 of I’m Fine Save Me (The Spiral Duet #1)

“I think she’s tired of being both parents when he’s away, but I know how much she loves it when he’s home.

At least she acts happier when he’s stateside.

He swears this will be his final tour and then he’s done re-enlisting.

He tells Coop that if he isn’t a man , being tough, or doing everything to make sure I don’t have to work, then he’s failing me as a husband; and I’m going to leave him for someone else. ”

She lets out a mirthless laugh.

“It’s even funnier that he doesn’t know about our open marriage arrangement. Cooper will never tell him, because God only knows what other bullshit he would try to put into his head.”

“He doesn’t exactly sound like a guy that deserves the title of best friend,” I tell her honestly.

Tegan sighs. “Yea, I know. It’s why I was hoping he and Chris would be able to talk, but they texted a few times, and then Chris started ignoring him even more than he ignored me.

It wasn’t worth it to hurt us both, but Cooper said this morning that I’m not allowed to hold onto things for his sake anymore.

Either I want it, or I don’t. Either I’m happy or I’m not… ”

I ponder that for a moment and realize that she hasn’t actually said what she does want.

“I’m guessing since you’re still talking to me, I’m given the all clear to do everything in my power to show you that you can trust me? I can prove that I’m not a complete twat waffle like your ex?”

Her laughter sings over the line and I bite my bottom lip to try and keep my smile from splitting my damn cheeks.

“Something like that, you fucking demon.”

We talk for a little while longer before I ask, “Is Cooper around?”

She pauses, and I almost feel bad for catching her off guard. It’s been a great half hour and I’ve been parked in my driveway for most of that, just enjoying talking to her. I

It’s easier to get her to open up than when we’re typing messages back and forth. She doesn’t have as much time to overthink her responses or to read the things she’s saying. Instead, she’s just openly talking with me and I love every second of it.

She’s told me about her daughter being Autistic instead of the general ‘special needs’ that she’s always told me. I’ve learned that Cooper shares the same diagnosis along with depression, anxiety, and ADHD.

Tegan even told me about her absolutely psychotic biological father and the last time she attempted to mend her relationship with him. Apparently he’s tried to contact her several times over the last month since she abruptly left dinner; but she has ignored his calls, leaving his texts unread.

“Huh?”

“Is Cooper around?” I ask her again, smiling. “I want to talk to him if he’ll speak to me, babygirl.”

“Why?” she asks, completely befuddled with the request.

“Because, I am constantly flirting with and fantasizing about his woman, and I want to talk to the man who is willing to share a piece of you.” I tell her the truth of it.

The man is willing to let me try to build a long distance relationship with his wife. I need to hear it from him along with the rules he has for us.

I hear her speaking, but she must’ve covered the speaker because I can’t make out what she’s saying.

“He’s right here.”The next voice I hear has a very neutral accent.

“Hey, Morgan is it?”

He sounds more like he’s from the midwest or Florida than from Georgia, but that’s not why I want to talk to him. I tuck that little note away for a later conversation.

“That’s right. Morgan Harlow. A pleasure to finally put a voice to the husband Tegan tells me about.”

For as little as Tegan was willing to give me in the beginning, she does talk mostly about Cooper when she tells me about her life.

I know that he’s misunderstood. Not many take the time to get to know him past his quirks; but she’s so clearly in love with him that I know there’s something there that makes him a good man.

Cooper sounds like he’s smirking. “Oh yea? I’ll have to talk to you when she’s not standing right beside me looking like one of us is going to piss off the other. Then you can tell me all the awful things she says about me.”

“I am not!”

I hear Tegan in the background and both Cooper and I laugh.

“I didn’t want to speak to you to piss you off.” I clear my throat and shift in my seat.

I’ve never done this before.

Yea, I’ve written some smut with various female characters online and gotten myself off to it, but I’ve never wanted anything serious out of it.

I want Tegan.

I want to know her. I want to be there for her when she needs to feel like she isn’t alone, because she won’t be. I want the right to own some of her smiles and laughs; and I want to be able to call her mine in whatever capacity he and she will allow.

“You’ve got an amazing wife, Cooper. I don’t know nearly as much about her as I want to, but I do want this to be more than just writing fiction and chatting every now and again.

She’s already the best friend I didn’t know I needed.

I want you to know that I don’t plan on being like either of those dicks before.

If you want to plan a night that we both work to make her scream, call me and we’ll plan it.

I’ll show up and we’ll give her every ounce of pleasure she needs.

If she is having a hard time because of that asshole Wayne and you’re having a rough go of it?

I want to be there for her in whatever way I can. ”

The other end of the call is so quiet that I check to make sure the voice chat didn’t disconnect. Then I hear him clear his throat.

“My head is a scary place, Morgan. I’m not always able to be the man she deserves.

I’m not always able to be intimate with her.

I’m seldom in the right headspace to support her the way she needs.

I’m a lot to take and she holds up her promise of “for better or worse” every single fucking day.

She’s an incredible mother and she’s my best friend too.

I should’ve found Chris, that fucking asshole, and beaten him until he was black and blue for the way he treated her. ”

“You and I both. She always asked me not to say anything to him, but I saw it too.”

I admit to him and it kills me to say it out loud. I shouldn’t have listened to her; but then I don’t know if she’d have ever turned to me if I had ignored that request.

“I’m not going to treat her like that, but I need to know the rules here.

I’ve never done this before and I’m not moving across state lines.

I have a family of my own with different circumstances than yours.

My wife and I are technically estranged but living like roommates.

There are rare but occasional benefits until my youngest goes off to college. That’s still a few years away.”

“You plan on this working out that long?” Cooper asks me with a bit of doubt in his voice.

I can’t really blame him. Tegan and I are basically strangers on the internet that are trying to be more than that. Then again, how is this any different than people meeting on dating apps these days?

Perhaps it’s the beginning in a roleplay forum that makes it different and weird to some, but it worked out for us… and damn if the woman hasn’t captivated me from that first fictional interaction… all the way to the first real conversation.

“Fuck I hope so. She’s amazing and you know that. I’ve had the hope of getting her to trust me for some time now. I hope that her handing you the phone means that she’s finally coming around to that.”

My heart is pounding. This man could easily hang up and tell his wife that he won’t allow this.

Would he?

I didn’t even ask what headspace he was in; maybe that should’ve been the first thing I asked before speaking with him.

Fuck!

Cooper says something to Tegan with the speaker covered and then his voice is clear once more.

“I’m not exactly ready to physically share her yet anyway.

We will need to work up to that, and she has to tell me she really wants it.

If she gets hurt again, I don’t know if either of us can take it.

I want her to be happy and respected. She needs to be comfortable and not always wondering what the fuck she did wrong.

She deserves so much better than what she’s had so far. ”

“Then we will talk about the physical stuff as we go. Are you okay with the two of us talking on the phone? Or was today a one time deal?”

“She can talk to you however she’s comfortable talking to you.”

He easily gives that entire decision to her.

“If you want to talk to me, text me first. I work on call, so I don’t always have the luxury of answering my phone, but I prefer to talk. I suck at reading a tone and can take things the wrong way.”

“Noted,” I agree.

I have a feeling talking to Cooper will be a really good way to keep Tegan’s mind at ease. Especially with the way Chris completely disregarded him. Then he even had the audacity to be jealous about her actually fucking her husband.

“And for the record, I won’t be the prick who gets mad and gives her the silent treatment. I’ll be happy when she’s happy and do my best to make her happy when I realize she isn’t. We’ll talk if something doesn’t work. Simple as that.”

Cooper doesn’t miss a beat this time. “Good. That’s all I want for her, and I get it if you don’t want to talk to me. You’re not in this for a friendship with her husband.”

“You’re right, I’m not. That doesn’t mean that we can’t talk, especially about her. If she’s going to have both of us, I don’t think ignoring and alienating you does either of us any favors.”

While I didn’t exactly go into this looking to bond with him, I can see that we’ll make a good team when it comes to keeping this girl from losing herself to stress and worry.

“Anything else?”

“Not that I can think of, but Tegan will give you my number. Text me so I have yours and I can use it to find a way to track you down if I need to make up for not kicking Chris’s ass.”

He laughs and I chuckle right back.

“Nice talking to you, Morgan.”

“You too, Cooper.” I let out a long sigh of relief and hear the phone being passed back to Tegan. When she immediately apologizes I scold her lightly.

“I’m going to make a list of rules and then talk to Cooper about how we can team up and punish you for breaking them… one of the rules is most definitely going to be that you are not allowed to needlessly apologize for things outside of your control.”

“Sor—” she stops herself from doing it yet again. “What kind of punishment?” The question comes in a tone of bratty curiosity.

I have to admit, she’s got a talent for working her way around the slip up. So I let it slide.

“I don’t know. A blow job? Since I can’t be there to receive them, Cooper will have to let me know when the debt has been collected. We can always work out those details. No need to plan it all out now.”

I’m grinning like a fool again, already thinking of all the ways I can punish her without it actually being a punishment. There won’t be any of that silent treatment, learning lessons, bullshit.

She’ll learn how not to be so worried about every little thing.

She will learn that not everything is her fault.

She will learn that she is worth so much more than she thinks.

I don’t know what the guys before me broke inside of her, but I’m going to fix it. Now I know that Cooper is on board to help me do so.

“I need to go inside and help with dinner, baby girl. Are you feeling alright?”

“Yes, of course. Why wouldn’t I be?” she asks with a slight air of incredulity.

I can’t help but chuckle. “Because you sound like you’re worried I’m upset.”

“I’m— well I am but you sound happy,” she says with a bit of confusion.

“I am happy, baby girl. I was just given limits that I’ll respect and made promises that I’ll very much enjoy upholding.

” I get out of my truck and start making my way up the path to the front door.

“Text me Cooper’s number please, yours too if you’re ready for that.

Either way, I’ll talk to you later tonight if neither of us can sleep or if you’re not busy with your other man. ”

“Oh so you’re my man now too?” she laughs as if she doesn’t believe that statement.

“I am, pretty girl, just like you’re my girl now too.”

I smile and end the call before she can argue any further.