Page 28 of I’m Fine Save Me (The Spiral Duet #1)

She tells me about things she’s handling at work, and how she’s doing in her online classes. My girl is almost done with her second degree, and I somehow hadn’t realized she only had a couple of semesters left before graduation.

My demons have stolen more time than I realized.

When she stops taking morsels from the tray and her second glass of wine is empty, I finish off my water and set everything back on the TV tray.

“Come here, Gorgeous,” I whisper and pull her closer to me. That smile returns and makes my heart squeeze tightly.

Fuck I’ve missed that smile.

Reaching up, I tug the corner of the towel free from her cleavage, and pull back enough to enjoy the view it allows me.

Those damp panels fall away from her chest and I lean down to press a reverent kiss against her sternum.

I press another a little higher. Every half inch receives a kiss up to the hollow of her throat.

Lifting my head, I claim her lips in a slow kiss that deepens a little more with every breath until I have to break away and remind her.

“Laptop.”

“What if I just want you?” she asked quietly, eyes bouncing back and forth between my own.

That look makes me wish I could do this without disappointing her.

I’ll not get off and she’ll feel guilty.

I’ll have to assure her that it’s me and not her.

I’ll do something wrong and show my frustration and ruin the mood if I do this on my own.

If she has something other than me to focus on, she won’t have a reason to feel insecure.

“I’d give you anything you wanted if I had the ability, you know that.”

“You know that I’d be happy with just you, right?” she asks, smoothing a hand over my jaw to cup my cheek.

When Tegan has a point to make, she doesn’t let me hide from her truths. This isn’t her placating me and my own insecurities. She means it.

I smile and turn my head just enough to kiss her palm, then the inside of her wrist while I hold onto the back of her hand.

“I want to give you more though. I want you satisfied in every way. So open your laptop and start writing all those filthy words that I can’t say without getting awkward.”

My grin turns playful and the light laugh it evokes from her is like a balm to my frayed nerves.

“I love you so much, Coop.” Every single word is a declaration that I feel tattooed on my soul.

Giving her a soft kiss before nipping her bottom lip, I smile. “I love you too. Now.. get settled in a position where you can type and still be ready for me. I’ll figure out the rest.”

I watch her throat bob in a slow, nervous swallow as she nods and turns to open the laptop. With a quick arrangement of the pillows against the couch-turned-headboard, she props herself up and settles the device on her abdomen.

Soon she’s tapping out a message, then another, and another. The silence is suddenly pierced by a soft ping. “Do you want me to mute that?”

I shake my head. “No, I want to hear that you’re actually sending messages and getting them. Consider it a game. If I stop hearing pings, I’ll think I’ve won and I might just stop whatever it is I’m doing.”

There’s no missing the way her skin flushes and I relish her reaction. She sends another few messages before I peel the towel away from her lower half to leave her completely naked. Her eyes fly up from the screen to meet mine, and I just grin at her.

Pointing at her computer, I silently urge her to pay attention to what Chris is depicting. He’d asked me if I wanted to know what he set up for her, and I declined.

While Tegan has read me some of the most erotic scenes she’s written with Chris and even Jackson, I’ve never been a reader myself.

I prefer movies because they only require my attention for a short period.

It amazes me that she can read the words in a book or on the screen and picture it like a movie in real time.

There’s so many things she does that absolutely astonish me, and I wish I could share more of that with her.

I wish I could be more like her and not have to fight for every single thought to be on the same thing.

Already, I’m having to fight off the fact that I need to fix the squeaky faucet in the bathroom, that it’s been almost six years since she’s taken a long shower, that I have left her almost completely sexually unsatisfied for months on end…

Stop.

Just. Fucking. Stop. I tell myself, and focus my attention on her again.

My hands gently caress her legs when she finally focuses on the screen again.

Her fingers fly over the keys quickly. I have no idea what she’s writing or how the fuck she’s coming up with it so quickly, but the subtle clicks of her nails against the keyboard are like a metronome that centers me in the moment.

It clicks then that I’m missing music.

With a gentle kiss to her inner thigh, I pull back and grab my phone from the mantle to turn on one of my more calm playlists.

Turning the volume up just enough to keep my thoughts at bay, I go back to my girl with a slow trail of kisses from her delicate ankle bone, up the curve of her toned calf, to just behind her knee.

I feel her shiver and hear the ping of Chris’s reply to her. When I know she’s reading, I continue that trail along her skin, but I don’t give her smooth pussy any attention. Instead, I bypass her mound and move to begin my descent along her other leg.

“Cooper,” she whispers on a soft whine, but the light tapping of her keyboard doesn’t stop until she hits send. “Do you want me to read it to you?”

I shake my head and graze my teeth over the flesh of her calf while making my next return trip upward. “I can’t listen to you talk dirty and focus on my own dirty thoughts. You’re the multitasker in this marriage.”

Her soft laugh accompanies another ping and I finally drag my tongue up the length of her slit, groaning at the delectable taste of her.

I’ve always thought Tegan tasted like the sweetest temptation.

It’s like the forbidden fruit that drew Adam and Eve into sin.

Perhaps it was what made it so easy for the devil to tempt humans into disobeying God, because I can’t imagine anything more worth an eternity in the flames.

If this one taste was all I was allowed before I was dragged into Hell, then I would relish the lingering taste while I burned.

Realizing my thoughts took another sharp turn and tumbled down yet another rabbit hole, I slide my hands along her inner thighs, forcing her to spread wider for me.

Between the soft beats of the music, the pings from her laptop, and the taps of her keys, I can hear the slightest intakes of breath while I tease her.

I have no idea how much time has passed since she’s gotten started, but I know I want to push her to distraction like I promised.

Sliding one finger into her tight channel, I circle her clit with my tongue. The moan that escapes her gives me pause. Then I feel her clench around my finger and shift her hips closer.

I used to love the noises she made, and part of me still does.

Tegan doesn’t really put on a show for the hell of it.

If she makes noise, it’s because she’s enjoying it.

The voices in my head always detract from my enjoyment, wanting to analyze every note to see if it’s actually pleasure, if she’s in pain, or if she doesn’t like what I’m doing at all.

My movements falter. Fortunately for me, she seems to think I’m stopping because of her. I hear the taps of her nails against the keys quickly start back up.

Get out of your head, Cooper.

After giving myself another mental scalding, I pull my finger free of her vice-like grip, and drag my tongue up along the full length of her slit for another taste.

“Cooper,” she whispers. “Baby, please…” Her voice sounds almost desperate.

“Has it been hours already?” I ask her and smile, though I’m anything but confident in how long it’s actually been. Watching as she glances down at the clock on her screen, I quietly drag the small bag I had tucked away to my side before she can notice.

“Only… an hour.. But Cooper–” she locks her gaze on mine over the edge of the screen. “I want you…”

I’m hard as a fucking rock, but I know I’m going to disappoint her.

I won’t come and it’ll ruin everything.

“Soon, baby,” I promise her instead. If I can hold out a little longer and keep my attention on her and what her body needs, maybe I’ll drive myself to a point of need that can overpower these fucking side effects.

A soft whimper escapes her and those whispers at the back of my head try to gain volume.

She’s fine. She would tell me to stop if she wasn’t. I tell myself while sliding the slender, purple vibrator from the bag with a small bottle of lube. I finally took some of the toys we bought out of their boxes.

After applying a bit of the lubricant to the toy, I pull one of her legs up over my shoulder to open her up to me a bit more. I get comfortable kneeling down on the mattress and bending forward to drag the toy teasingly along her slit.

“Cooper!” she gasps with her body jolting in surprise the moment I hit the button to turn on the vibration. I grip her thigh against my shoulder to keep her in place while chuckling against her knee, giving it a little kiss.

“Easy, Gorgeous… Don’t ignore Chris.” I gently admonish, pressing the tip against her clit and watching her face this time as she groans.

I’m not always the best at reading facial expressions; but my wife’s expressions are loud enough that even I can interpret their meanings.

It helps keep my brain from trying to nitpick every little noise she makes when I’m watching her face.

Her mouth dropping open and eyes fluttering with an attempt to keep them from rolling back accompany the moaned curses falling from her lips.

Perhaps she’s too busy moaning to hear the ping, but she doesn’t react to the sound at all while I work the toy inch by inch into her dripping pussy.

Her chest rises and falls with every breathy moan, at least until I pull the toy back out and away from her.

Her eyes snap open to find my face over the glow of the screen. “He’s going to wonder why you aren’t responding, baby.”

“I can tell him I have to go,” she suggests.

Shaking my head, I give the inside of her knee another gentle kiss, rubbing my beard back and forth against the smooth skin. “That’s not the deal. I’m supposed to make you come at least once before you log off, and you’re supposed to keep writing your dirtiest scene.”

Her fingers go back to a more unsteady cadence of her typing, and I slide the toy back inside of her fully before turning it back on. The sharp gasp and her gritted teeth expression make me swell with a certain degree of satisfaction.

I do love giving my girl pleasure and watching her try to keep herself together.

Working the toy in and out, loving the sound of how wet she is, I move a bit faster.

If she waits too long after the ping to respond, I stop.

If she manages to read and respond without too much hesitation, I continue working the full length of the toy out to the tip and then quickly thrust it back inside of her.

My fingers are drenched with her arousal and my body aches to be inside of hers.

“Cooper…” she whimpers my name and I feel myself giving in. I’m over this game and want to make her come so I can be inside of her. I want to make her feel so good that there’s no room left for insecurity.

“Wrap it up for me, baby.” With that, I dip down to wrap my lips around her clit, flicking my tongue against it. Sucking that swollen bud while thrusting the toy in and out of her clenching walls, I relish the taste of her.

She’s fucking dripping with need while her thighs quake around my head, and I lap her up greedily. The tapping of the keyboard stops, and I hear the thud of the laptop shutting before I feel her fingers curl tightly into my hair. Her hips rise up to grind against my mouth and the toy.

Those moans of hers grow louder. I focus on her taste and how difficult it is to work the toy through the tight clenching of her spasming cunt.

When Tegan screams my name, I feel like I’ve taken a hit of the most addictive drug. Her body spasms and writhes against the mattress while she pulls at my hair. I can’t tell if she’s trying to pull me off of her or pull me closer, but I can’t stop tasting her.

Not yet.

I haven’t had her like this in too long. I want to savor every second of her shaking legs, her bucking hips, and those sweet cries that my mind normally wants to latch onto with every negative thought possible.

Looking up the length of her body, I’m grateful for the way she’s propped herself up against the couch. Without pulling my mouth away from her slit, I can watch those loud expressions play across her face to keep the moans from waking my demons.

Pushing the toy as deep inside of her as it will reach, I tilt it just right and hit the button to increase the speed.

She’s already come once but I missed her face.

I want the entire show this time. Her head tilts backward until it’s resting against the couch cushion, and her hips attempt to lift against my hold on her thigh.

Her luscious tits bounce with every heaving breath.

Unable to hold back any longer, I turn off the toy and slide it free, tossing it to the side. My lips make a lewd smack when I finally release her clit and sit up to remove my shirt and shorts.

I’m feral for her and I wish I could say the words. I wish I could give her all the filthy verbal teasing that I know she likes. The dirty things she’s able to so easily write into paragraphs of erotic frenzy.

I can’t though.

If I think about it too much, this moment will be gone and I need her.

I need to be inside her like I need my next breath.

Her flushed cheeks and heaving chest draw me in as I climb over her and claim her lips in a hungry kiss.

Almost savagely, I thrust inside of her and swallow the guttural moan that vibrates down to my fucking marrow.

She clenches around my cock with her slick, heated walls.

I thought the taste of her would damn me to hell, but being inside of her is paradise.