Page 47

I walked back to the floor below the house and there I found MJ still wandering around while Veronica was now in a corner of the party with a guy.

I walked to the counter in search of water before returning to the dorm, but that was a grotesque mistake. I regretted it the same second MJ grabbed my arm and pushed me against the wall.

“What do you think you're doing?” I growled into his face.

“If you don't want to kiss me, you can at least pretend to flirt, how about that?” His long fingers pulled a strand of my hair behind my ear while a weak smile took over his mouth.

I didn't smile, I was pissed.

What an annoying boy!

“I'm not going to pretend that I'm into you to make her jealous, for two reasons: 1) it won't make her come back to you, in fact, it will make her feel even more repelled by you. Furthermore, it will make my life hell because I see her in practice every day; and point 2), you're not my type.”

He laughed loudly. And I wanted to kick him in the balls.

“You know, she called you a fat cow... I don't know why you resist so much about not wanting to hurt someone who doesn't care about you.”

The words reached places inside me that they shouldn't have.

Cow. Fat.

I blinked a couple of times.

“Oh, that’s it…” MJ smiled. “Yes, I want to make you that mad.” His face tilted toward me, forcing me to turn away. My teeth grinded. “Now kiss me, Kendra.”

I let my two hands rest on his defined chest and looked at him again.

“Not even if my life depended on it, Martin.” I roared and pushed him. I left the room, almost tripping over people until I reached the door of the house and went out into the street.

My steps became faster until I had to lean on a post, leaning forward and letting all the alcohol I had consumed leave my system, vomiting it all up.

Fat cow.

Cow. Fat.

Fat.

My eyes burned, but I refused to cry because a guy had a bruised ego. And, most of all, I refused to cry because of Veronica Torres.

3 YEARS AGO

There was just one category left before we took the stage at the regional cheerleading championship. I was very confident about our choreography, but at the same time there was a small hint of insecurity because it was my first year as team captain. This time there would no longer be Colleen to help out. And I would be the one who needed to give a pep talk, the worst part was that I wasn't suited to give pep talks.

I took a deep breath as I walked back and forth, still outside the gym where the presentations were taking place. I was nervous, more than normal, because, on one hand, I believed I should never have accepted being captain of the team, but, on the other, I knew that it was one of the only things in my life that made me happy.

And yet, I couldn’t shake the feeling of being a fraud about it.

It was like I would never be good enough for anything. I would never be enough of a daughter, I would never be enough of a student, I would never be enough of a friend or enough of a cheerleader.

My eyes stung, but I refused to ruin my extremely well-done makeup, so I fanned my face and counted to ten while breathing in and out as much air as possible.

I wanted distance from everyone, however, the only thing I managed was to find Veronica Torres a few meters away from me, still in the company of her boyfriend. They were talking and he had brought her a big bouquet of red roses.

They looked like they were having an argument, even with a bouquet that size between them. The day before, Veronica had looked so bad that she didn't even look like the captain of the team that won last year, and something inside me told me it had something to do with Martin Jeffery, the black eye on his face and the bouquet of flowers.

I was a little entertained watching them from a distance. I got distracted by them and as soon as Martin left Veronica, her eyes came to me. I felt even more nervous about her attention, so I looked away and looked at the clock outside the gym. There was little time left for the presentation.

“Kendra, don’t you still have to perform.” She approached and stopped next to me.