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I’m not a romantic man by nature, but for her and for this ... Hopefully for the start of our lives together, I can do romance.All for her.I’ll pretend to be someone else until both of us believe it.
At the sound of the doorknob turning, my heart skips in my chest, hammering harder than I anticipated. I take a step back, pulling the box from my pocket and preparing to get down on my knee. My blood heats and anxiety suddenly washes through me. It’s really happening. I’m really going to ask her to marry me. The thought itself calms me.
Of course I am.I love her.
I run my hand through my hair as she steps forward enough to come through the doors. I thought she’d be astonished by the sight of the room. I imagined her taking it all in, but she’s only looking at me.
“Julianna Lynn Summers, I would be honored—” I start and already I’ve fucked up. I had this damn thing rehearsed. I thought I had it all memorized but having to look up at her, and not knowing what she’s going to say … I stumbled over my words.
Jules covers her mouth with a gasp, letting the front door shut slowly behind her. Her shoulders hunch forward some as her purse falls to the ground. I knew she’d be emotional; I just wish the shock would wane so I could see which side of her was winning out. The side that loves me and wants to live in the moment, or the side stuck in the past and afraid to move on.
Jules takes a few steps forward when I don’t continue, her thin heels clicking on the polished wood floors as she places her hands on my shoulders and starts to lower herself to the ground, but that’s not how I want her. I don’t know how I’m able to wrap an arm around her long legs and look up at her, still holding the ring out although she’s staring into my eyes. Her skin is soft beneath my touch.
“Jules, I love you and I want to spend every day of my life with you.” I hesitate to say the words but I have to, even if she says she can’t. “I want you as my wife,” I tell her and watch her facial expression crumple with a hint of pain reflected in her eyes as I say the words.
“I love you too, Mason.” She barely gets out the words as she covers her face with both her hands and then wipes under her eyes. Her eyes are glossy with tears and her voice is choked as she says it again. “I love you and I didn’t know if I could …” Hearing her start her confession breaks my heart and I rise just enough to hold her. She wraps her arms around my shoulders, gripping onto me as though she needs me to stand. And in so many ways, she does. She needs someone there and I’ll always be that person for her.
So long as she’ll let me.
She pulls away slightly, trying to pull herself together as she brushes her hair out of her face and looks away, taking a calming breath.
“I want all of you, Jules,” I tell her as I cup her chin in my hand and force her to look at me. “When you’re upset, I want to know so I can make you smile. When you’re angry, just tell me. I’ll let you take it out on me however you need, then make you cum so hard you’ll forget you ever felt anything other than bliss. I want the real you. Always. I never want you to hide from me.”
Those lush lips part and a soft breath escapes her as she stares into my eyes. She’s searching for something. She better not fucking wonder if everything I’ve just said is true or not.
“I want the same from you, Mason.” I’m surprised at her response. I stay still on the ground, wondering how she could think for a second I wouldn’t share all of me with her. Not my past, though. She doesn’t know shit about that and she never will. None of it. I’m going to fix it all and keep it hidden in the shadows and buried nine feet deep where it all belongs.
She kneels on the floor in front of me and takes my jaw in both her hands, planting a soft sweet kiss on my lips. Her touch calms all my worries. It dispels the demons threatening to surface. She does this to me. She makes me a better person and I desperately want to be that man for her.
She speaks with her eyes closed, her lips close to mine and her hot breath filling the air between us. Her long, thick lashes are damp with her tears as she tells me, “I love you for you. The good and the bad. And I do want to be with you, Mason.” Her voice is pained and I can’t help but reach out and hold her, pulling her closer to me. “I need you,” she whispers.
I kiss the crook of her neck. “All I need is your love.”
“You have it, Mason.”
She has yet to answer; I need to hear her tell me yes. I want to be good enough to be her husband and if I’m not today, thentomorrow I’ll be better. I’m determined and she needs to know that. I put my hands on her shoulders.
“I love you, Jules. Will you marry me?” I ask her, looking deep into her eyes.
She gives me a sweet smile, almost a shy one as she sniffles and finally gives me everything I need by saying, “I love you too. Yes.” Her words come out as if it’s obvious. As if it’s only natural.
I finally breathe a deep sigh of relief, heaving in the air and holding her close to me. I stand up, still carrying her and swing her in my arms as I rise.
I kiss up her neck and every inch of her exposed skin, making her let out a small, feminine laugh and push away from me slightly. This is the only kind of pushing I ever want her to do again. From this day forward, she’s mine.
I only set her down so I can take out the ring from the box. I watch as Jules’s eyes widen once again. “Oh my gosh,” she says softly, eyeing the ring as though it’s the most beautiful thing she’s ever seen.
“Do you like it?” I ask her as I slip the box into my pocket and hold the ring out for her.
She bites her bottom lip as she nods vigorously and says, “Mason, it’s beautiful.” Finally, she looks up at me as I slip the ring onto her finger. “I love it,” she whispers.
A small breath leaves her as she rubs her fingers over my five o’clock shadow and gently kisses me. I’ve never felt anything like what I feel for her. Seeing my ring on her finger makes it seem as though it’s all going to be all right.
As long as the past will stay buried where it belongs.
JULIA
Lies lies go away,