Page 62 of Phoenix's Fire

"Do you even know how your friend got pregnant?"

I rolled my eyes. "Yes. We're given lessons on a wife's duties once we are old enough to have our monthly courses."

"Period."

"What?"

"It's a period," she clarified.

"Oh." Because Zasen had told me that, but the way she'd said it hadn't made sense. "Yes. And it's okay for men to know here, but not there. Women's things were considered rude and unappealing, so we were supposed to keep those to ourselves. That's all Meri knows, and I'm trying to help her, but I'm still learning how things work up here too."

Lessa lifted both hands to press at the air even as her feet stalled out. "And you knew Meri would be upset?" she asked, sounding like she was daring me to agree.

So I lifted my chin and looked her right in the eyes. "I know the Dragons will take care of her, even though Naomi's worried about the pregnancy. I also know her husband is a hunter. Zasen says she might know something, and we all know they'll come back, so I had to tell her. Meri isn't stupid, Lessa. She's just confused. Very confused, and I'm trying to make sure she knows the truth."

"And what truth is that?" she asked.

"They lied - about everything - but we women still take care of each other. That was the only thing we had, and now that she's here, I'm not going to stop. Maybe it was hard for her to hear it, but it would be just as hard next week, or the week after."

"But she's pregnant!" Lessa hissed.

"And she'll still be pregnant when they come back." I crossed my arms over my chest, daring her to say I was wrong. "What happens if they get Jeera or Brielle? If they storm into her house and want to know where they are? If she thinks they're the 'Righteous,' she might tell them!"

"They never make it that far north," Lessa assured me. "That's why Brielle lives up there."

"Oh." What else could I say to that?

Lessa simply pushed out a heavy sigh and gestured for me to keep walking. "And sex doesn't hurt. It's pretty good, actually. So you know, Zasen is a good lover."

"Lessa!" I gasped.

Which made her laugh. "See, it is okay to talk about this." Once more, she sighed. "And he was right about you. Fuck. I wish he wasn't, but damn."

"I..." My head jiggled from side to side in confusion. "What?"

"After we met," she explained, "I gave Rymar and Kanik an earful about you. I wanted to hate you, Ayla, because you're stealing my man."

"I'm not!" I insisted. "I told him I'm not ever going to do that!"

"You will," she said, giving me a knowing smile. "One day, one of those menwill be too nice, and you'll wonder. I can't say if you'll like it or not, but I have a feeling you'll try it at least once, and that's okay. Just make sure you have a shot of birth control first, okay?"

"Naomi gave me one today," I admitted sheepishly.

"Good," she said. "But that makes me think I'm right. If you really weren't interested, then you wouldn't think you needed one."

"But - " I stopped myself there.

"What?" she pressed.

Hanging my head, I finished that thought. "In the compound, we had to mind our virtue because men couldn't control themselves. Kanik and Zasen say that's rape, and I've read about rape, but itallseems like rape to me."

She shifted a little closer and reached up to rub my shoulder. "There's a huge difference, but don't you dare let those boys pressure you, okay? If they try, you tell me."

"Rymar said to tell him," I admitted. "And he's mad at Zasen for kissing me when I didn't want to, even though it didn't hurt, but I'm just confused. All of this is soconfusing!In truth, I feel like I'm always confused, but Meri's here now, and she needs me, so I have to make sure I know it all - but Idon't!"

"You don't have to know it all," she promised. "You just have to know where to find the answers, and Rymar is a good place. So am I. So are Brielle and Jeera. Naomi too. Saveah! Any of us will help explain things, and we're not trying to unlearn it." She laughed once. "No, that's a lie. I'm trying to remember you're not a Mole."

"My mother was a Dragon," I pointed out.