Page 219 of Phoenix's Fire

The thing inside me bounced again, and I could no longer ignore the pressure on my bladder. Pushing myself up, I tossed back the covers and slid out of bed. The washroom was just across the hall, so I waddled that way to do my business.

As I cleaned my hands, I looked in the mirror. The lights were out, but darkness up here wasn't that dark. I could see the shape of my face, the pale mass of my hair, and my growing breasts. The girl I'd been was gone, replaced with this reflection that looked so much like a stranger.

I paused to dampen my face, hoping I could convince my body to sleep again, but a light tap sounded at the door.

"Meri?" It was Brielle, and she was whispering.

I hurried to open the door. "Sorry. I need to go a lot."

"I was just worried," Brielle promised. "Wanted to make sure you hadn't started labor or anything." She gestured up the hall. "Need something to relax?"

"Yes!" I gasped. "I am so tired, but I can't sleep."

She steered me toward the kitchen. "Heartburn or the child in the way?"

"The child," I mumbled.

Which made Brielle chuckle. "That means it won't be long now. Don't worry. When the kid gets here, we'll make sure you can sleep as much as you need."

"But I'll have to care for the baby," I reminded her.

She pulled out a chair and gestured for me to sit at the table. "And I happen to like babies. So does Jeera. I promise we will take over any time you need a break."

"What if all I want is a break?" I asked, watching as she headed to the stone cabinet to pull out a pitcher of cool juice. "Brielle, what if I'm not a good mother?"

"Meri, I'm going to tell you a secret," she said as she poured two glasses and headed back to claim the chair diagonal from me. "No one starts out as a good mother. Even the best mothers make mistakes. See, children are people, and everyone has their own personality. That means the way you think might not be what the child is reacting to, and so on."

"Oh."

She pressed the glass into my hands. "But making mistakes isn't the end of theworld. Caring is what matters. That's what a mother needs to do. Not to always be the one to do the things, but to care enough to ask for help when she needs it."

I cradled the glass, thinking over her words. "What if I don't want to?" I asked before taking a sip.

Brielle waited until I put the glass back on the table. "Dragons have options, Meri. From what Ayla's told us, I think Moles only have one: raise your child. Right?"

I nodded.

So she reached over to take my hand. "Okay, let me start at the beginning. Dragons have birth control. That prevents sex from creating a child. That means women can choose when and if they want to ever be pregnant - usually. Birth control doesn't always work. It's rare, but sometimes it does fail. Sometimes people don't get it on time, or other things happen like not being able to afford it. In that case, a woman might get pregnant when she doesn't want to be."

"Okay," I said. "But she laid with a man? That means it's her responsibility."

"Children are not punishment," Brielle said. "They aren't repercussions or duties. Children are people, who come with all the complications of a small person who is completely reliant on another."

"Yeah," I grumbled.

"And not everyone wants that," Brielle went on. "Also, not everyone chooses to have sex. That's what 'rape' means. Sometimes, what you think you're agreeing to isn't what ends up happening. In most cases, that also counts as rape. If he promises to pull out and doesn't, removes protection, or any of a million ways a woman can have sex without intending to get pregnant, but still end up that way."

"Okay?" I asked, listening a little harder.

Brielle bobbed her head as she chose her words. "In those cases, we can perform an abortion. That is removing the fertilized egg while it's still just a mass of cells. For Dragons, we do not consider that a person. It's a potential person, and if the mother doesn't agree to carry it, then we do not force her. Other times, a pregnancy can be dangerous. If carrying a child to term will risk a mother's life, we can remove it. That is also an abortion."

"Kill it?" I asked.

She nodded. "Yes. Some people think that shouldn't be done. Others think it's an individual choice. Now, I'm not going to tell you which is right or wrong. I'm just saying we have the capability of doing it. Unfortunately, it can only be done to a certain point without causing more problems for you."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"I mean you're too far along," she explained. "If your child was born now - forced or naturally - it would survive. If we made it come early, that would cause lasting problems for it, or could. Your body could also suffer, making things even harder than your delicate condition already does. So, for you, abortion is not an option with this pregnancy, but it could be if you ever find yourself pregnant again. Make sense?"