Page 104 of Phoenix's Fire

So I waved at my body. "This. Be pregnant. It's all I'm good for, and now I'm stuck."

"No," she promised. "Meri, you're not stuck. Things are better here, I promise. You'll see."

I nodded because I wanted to believe her, but I knew my choices were different from hers. She wasn't a mother. Ayla was allowed to have her own life - and here it looked like a good one. But me? I was going to be a mother, whether I liked it or not.

I'd thought Gideon was going to be my perfect husband. I'd been wrong, and now no man would want me. I was still married to him, even though Jeera assured me that could be fixed, but divorce? That was sinful! What man would want a used woman like that? We all knew the widows were less appealing than the new women.

And yet my eyes jumped up to the man who'd guided me out here in time to see him wrap his arms around Brielle and kiss her neck. The dark-blue Dragon woman giggled and pressed back into him. I tried to pull my eyes away, but I wasn't fast enough. Jeera stepped in, but rather than yelling at the man, she turned his face to hers and kissed him even while he was holding Brielle!

Then Jeera turned and kissed Brielle. Beside me, Ayla followed my gaze over to them.

"See," she said. "Very different. None of the rules are the same, Meri, so it's going to be okay."

I hoped she was right. Maybe this world was different, but was it the kind of different that would work for me? Or was it the kind of different that would destroy me?

Thirty-Two

Zasen

Ayla seemed to like the dogs. For some reason, I hadn't expected that. Maybe it was because she'd been so nervous about them when we'd brought the bear back? Then again, she hadn't really been scared of the bear either. She'd just been cautious. Always cautious.

Meri, on the other hand, pulled into herself whenever the dogs got too close. Naturally, Tamin adored them, and twice now, he'd asked if he could have one. Saveah had finally told him that only adults could buy dogs. It wasn't true, but it did make the boy stop asking.

Soon enough, the food was done. Irrik helped me and Kanik set it all out on the table. Rymar and Lansin got drinks. The women? They got to sit and relax for a moment, but I still noticed Meri watching us with the same confusion Ayla had once had.

There was a bit of jostling as everyone got their food, but Ayla guided Meri through it easily. I was a little impressed with our little Phoenix. She alternated between Vestrian and English so easily, and demonstrated manners by doing and allowing Meri to see what was acceptable. But by the time the platters made their way around to me, the conversation had shifted again.

"So, do we know how long the Moles are out of their base?" Lansin asked.

"Two to three days," Ayla said.

"Before they get here," I corrected. "Then two to three more to get back."

Lansin thrust out his lower lip and nodded. "Okay. And I'm guessing we don't have a clue whether they use the roads or not?"

"Except for the damage they've done in the past," Rymar admitted. "We know travelers have been attacked. We do not know if they were using the roads or drawn to them by campfires."

Plucking a piece of meat from his plate, Irrik offered it to one of the dogs. "And you're meeting them in the forest this time? What if they aren't where you expect?"

That made Ayla glance up. "If we are out there early enough, we should catch them moving. Moles won't move around in the daylight." Then she turned and explained to Meri what she'd just said.

"Why?" Meri whispered in English.

So I gestured to show I had that answer. "Because the sunlight is bright. It hurts your eyes, and fighting is even harder when you can't see." I spoke in English for her.

Meri looked over at me, but this time she didn't flinch. Still, after she nodded, the girl stared for just a little too long. Then her eyes flicked down my arms, up to my head - probably my hair - and finally to my hands.

I casually cut another piece of meat and switched to Vestrian. "Mama, we're going to need first-aid supplies to take with us. Ayla, I want you to attend some of the training sessions."

"Really?!" she asked excitedly.

"What?" Meri breathed.

So Ayla switched to English. "Zasen's going to let me fight with the men!"

"But what if you get hurt?" Meri whimpered.

Which made my sister lean back. "Zasen, I'm going with you."