Page 36 of Phoenix's Fire
"He knows," Rymar assured me. "Bye, Zasen."
"Bye, Zasen," I mimicked.
"Have fun," Zasen called after us.
"Bye, Ayla!" Kanik's voice called down from the second floor.
I just shook my head and followed Rymar out. These men insisted there was nothing wrong with yelling through the house, but I couldn't do it. Too many years of being taught that a lady did not raise her voice - and certainly didn't yell down the halls - made it one of those things I simply couldn't shake.
"So," Rymar said, falling in beside me once we reached the road, "are you going to tell me what that moment was about with you and Zasen earlier?"
"When?" I asked. "And what do you mean by 'that' moment?"
He shook his head and chuckled. "When you pulled him to his feet and you both got lost in each other's eyes." Shifting closer, he draped his arm over me, hugging my neck. "Do youlikethe man, Ayla?"
I tensed at the contact, but forced myself to relax. This was Rymar, and he was my friend. Kanik said it was okay for Dragons to touch this way, and I was a Dragon now. I'd always been one, which may have been why I'd been so defiant, but I hadn't known that until a few weeks ago when I'd learned the woman across the street was my sister. So this was okay. I was okay. I also didn't really know how to answer Rymar's question.
"Zasen is my friend," I mumbled, "but he looked at me the same way as he did before he kissed me."
Suddenly, Rymar jerked back and his head snapped over to look at me. "He kissed you?" he demanded.
"Yeah, when Kanik told you," I explained. "It was after the last battle, when we were leaving Saveah's. It was after she saw my ring and the serpent on it. We walked outside, Zasen said he'd treat my wound, then kissed me. Kanik held my hand afterwards."
"Wait," Rymar begged. "Why was Kanik telling me that Zasen kissed you? And how did Zasen kiss you?" Confusion had taken over his expression. "I don't remember any of this."
"It was when Kanik came downstairs for the town meeting," I explained. "And then you said you'd teach me to use profanity."
Rymar just nodded his head slowly. "And I was half asleep." He nodded one more time. "Right. So you told Zasen it was okay to kiss you?"
"Well, it just kinda happened," I mumbled.
Those turquoise eyes of his held mine for a little too long. Even though our feet were moving, it felt like the world had paused between us right up until he sighed.
"I'm going to sting that fucker!" he grumbled. "He just up andkissedyou?"
"It didn't hurt," I quickly assured him.
"Maybe not," Rymar agreed, "but you didn't exactly give permission either. That dumb fuck! I made it clear..." He ended with a growl instead of words.
"I didn't mean to get him in trouble!" I hurried to explain. "I thought it was allowed. That it's okay for Dragons to touch!"
Pushing out a sigh, Rymar reached up to rub my closest shoulder. "There'snothing wrong with doing it," he explained, "ifbothpeople want to. Ayla, you've made it clear you don't want to be with a man like that. You just want friends, not kissing or sex. You don't want to get married. You don't want to have children. How many times have you told us that?"
"But it didn't hurt!" I said again, trying to make him understand. "Rymar, I always thought it would hurt! When Reynold Saunders kissed me, he shoved my lips against my teeth and banged our faces together. It didn't feel like that when Zasen kissed me. And then Zasen just walked away. He didn't expect me to dothatwith him!"
Which made Rymar murmur under his breath. "Okay, I won't sting him, but I will yell at him. Ayla, what he did? Kissing you without permission - even if it ended up okay? That's wrong. That's the sort of thing you need to tell me about, okay?"
I could feel my brow wrinkling on my forehead. "Okay, but why?"
"It's called consent," he explained. "You always have the right to not only say no to something, but also have it respected. If you say no and someone just walks all over that?" A grumble sounded deep in his throat. "Fuck, he knows better."
"But I didn't really mind," I insisted.
"And I get that." Rymar pushed a smile to his lips, but it looked fake - worried, almost. "The important thing is you don't have to do it, Ayla. You can pull away - "
"Or slap him," I broke in. "Yes, Kanik told me that. But I didn't want to." I paused, chewing on my lip.
Talking about this was weird, but I didn't want Zasen to get in trouble. That kiss hadn't hurt, and I wouldn't have known if he hadn't done it. Now I did, and I could see why the kisses in those forbidden books had been so desirable. I'd always thought they were just fantasy, but everything on the surface was a fantasy to me!
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