Page 267 of For the Fans

“No, I know. But I want you to know,” he sighs, tiredly, like even talking about this stuff for a few minutes takes the wind out of his sails. “You were my first, Aviel. I promise.”

“Iknowthat,” I tell him with absolute certainty. “You giving me your virginity was the best night of my life.”

He grins, puffing out a small laugh. “I just remember your face when Bridget said what she said in the restaurant… I didn’t want you to think I was lying to you, or hiding something.”

“I didn’t think that, gorgeous.”

He nods, chewing on his lip. “Bridget knew that I liked boys. I mean, I never actually told her outright, but she picked up on it. That was another reason she was so pissed off with our parents after everything. Because my dad made a few comments I wasn’t supposed to hear when they were fighting, about the abuse turning me gay…”

I roll my eyes. “Dumb bullshit.”

“I know, right?” he scoffs. But then his eyes soften. “He’s trying now, though. I’m proud of him. To be honest, I think part of the reason why he flipped his switch is because of you.”

“Me?”

“Yea. I told my parents that I’m in love with you, and I think maybe that got my dad. He likes you a lot, Avi. It’s clear, he’s always liked you. It was part of the reason I was so frustrated by you when they got married… Because you were this carefree art nerd, total opposite of the son he wantedmeto be, but he still liked you.”

“Your dad isn’t a bad person,” I rumble. “He’s flawed just like everyone, and he’s made some terrible mistakes. But he doesn’t deserve to burn for them.”

Kyran goes quiet for a moment, like he’s deep in thought, before he says, “I just wish I hadn’t wasted so much time swallowing my truth.” He shakes his head. “I think back onthe girls I dated, even flirted with… it turned into like this choreographed performance. And the pussy eating…”

He blinks hard and shakes his head.

I can’t even help myself. My head tips back in a laugh that has him grinning up at me. “You ate a lot of pussy??”

“Not alot…” He smirks. “But I definitely did it.”

“And?”

“Not for me,” he sighs.

This is blowing my mind right now.

“Oh my God, that’s why you seemed so hesitant with Frankie!” I gape at him, and he chuckles.

“I was so hard thinking about you,” he whispers, squirming on top of me. “I kept thinking about your hand inside your pants, secretly wishing you’d pull your cock out and maybe, like… touch me with it.”

A hum rumbles in my chest while I gaze down at him, lust and love and pure astonishment in my eyes. “Come here, please…”

He scoots up on me, allowing me to hold his jaw and pull his sweet, honest mouth to mine. “What else did you think about during our stupid threesome with my best friend?”

He laughs on my lips. “Your hand touching mine… While we both fingered her. I imagined what it would be like if you took your fingers out and let me suck on them.”

“Mmm… really?”

He nods. “Yea. But not to taste her vagina, obviously. I just really wanted to suck on something of yours.”

A whine leaves my lips, and he laughs at it. “You’re killing me right now. God, baby, I would’ve doneeverythingto you… I wanted it so bad at that point.”

“Yea?” He kisses along my jaw, sucking my earlobe between his lips.

“Yea… As soon as you gave me the green light, I was fucking salivating for it.”

He chuckles while my hands sink down to hold his ass, his lips and tongue toying with my ear. “I guess it’s a very fucking good thing that my dad’s business went under, huh?”

“Oh yea. If it wasn’t for the fans, we might never have hooked up. Or fallen in love…”

“Are you saying that everything we’re doing is still… for the fans?” he whispers in my ear, and I grin.