Page 209 of For the Fans

I shake my head, forcing the anxiety and dread down with a heavy gulp. “I’m just… I’m so glad you’re here.”

He blinks, the worry on his face retreating into his comfortable little grin. I can tell from the way his eyes keep lingering on my lips that he wants to kiss me. And Ireallywant him to…

But we’re out in the open. Inpublic.

I’ve never kissed a guy in public before…

“Let’s go in,” he rumbles, releasing me with a slow sweep of his hands off my body, like he doesn’t exactly want to stop touching, but he knows he has to. “I wanna feed you, gorgeous.”

I bite my lip, because that sounds amazing. I’m starving and, for some unknown reason, I love the idea of him wanting to care for me.

It’s fucking insane… I’m a grown man. I don’t need anyone to fawn over me. Yet when Avi does it, it makes me feel so special. Like I’m being cherished by someone who loves me as a man, not just a football player, a student, or an… object.

“I’m… I’m a little nervous,” I say to him, the words coming up on their own, like they’re itching to escape the confines of my mind and take refuge in him. “It’s been a while since I’ve seen my sister.”

“Well, I’m sure she’s really excited to see you, baby,” he tells me calmly.

I nod as he slips his hand subtly onto my lower back, guiding me inside the restaurant. And all the while, I’m pleading with my subconscious to just give me a break.

Don’t dredge up the past, please. No unwanted memories, no panic attacks.

I don’t want Avi to see me like that.

Inside, Avi gives the hostess my name, which is what our reservation is under, and she alerts us to the fact that Bridget is already here. She walks us into the dining area, and my hands are shaking, reaching out for Avi’s to brush them in a frustratingly unfulfilled moment of contact.

I just want to hold his hand, goddamnit. But Ican’t. I’m still too scared, and I hate it.

As soon as we’re in view of the back of the restaurant, I spot my sister. She’s seated at a table, typing on her phone, and my chest immediately warms. We don’t talk all that often, an occasional text or phone call here and there, but I keep up with her on social media, just to see what she’s up to. And because of that, I’m not surprised by how different she looks. Although to me, she still resembles the girl I grew up with.

Dirty-blonde hair, maybe a shade or two lighter than mine, and definitely longer than she used to keep it. She has Mom’s nose and chin, but Dad’s dark eyes. Her build is much more athletic than it used to be, because apparently, she runs a lot now.

Our approaching the table must catch her attention because she looks up, eyes locking on me instantly. Her lips sweep into a giant, delighted smile. But still, I can read the emotions on her face like they’re written in twenty-four point font.

“My baby brother…” Bridget whimpers, jumping up from her seat and attacking me, hugging onto me so hard I nearly topple over.

“Hey, Jeff Bridges.” I grin into her hair, squeezing her tight.

She giggles, sniffling like she might be crying. “How’s it going, Cobra Ky?”

I feel her trembling in my arms as she breaks down, gulping with her face in my chest. “I fucking hate how long it’s been… I’m so sorry, Kyran.”

“Stop,” I grunt, my gaze sliding to Avi, who’s smiling at this little scene of reunion, pouting and clutching his hands to his chest. I pull back to lock eyes with my sister, trying my hardest to convey firm sincerity. “No apologies. Everything is fine… I’m just so glad to see you.”

She untangles herself from me, wiping her eyes. “You look great, little bro. Seriously… You’re huge.” She grins, and I chuckle. But then her forehead lines. “Are you doing okay?”

“I’m better than okay,” I reply with certainty, my gaze repeatedly flicking to Avi.

Bridget peers at Avi, as if she’s actually looking at him for the first time, and her eyebrow cocks. “This is our stepbrother?”

I nod while Avi holds his hand out to her, one of his sweet smiles resting on his lips. “Yea. Avi. I’m so pumped to finally meet you…”

They shake hands, and I can see my sister assessing him the way she does. Bridget was never skeptical of people before everything…happened. I guess we both used to be pretty trusting and easy-going. But all that changed right before she left Boston, and now I can see it in her eyes. She’s trying to figure Avi out.

It’s gonna take a little more than a handshake to understand this one, sis.

“I’m glad to meet you too,” she says, tilting her head. “I’ve heard a lot about you over the years…” She glances at me. “In fact, it seems like most of our phone calls always end up on Avi-talk.”

I rub the back of my neck while Avi chuckles. “Well, if that’s true, then I’m gonna need to plead my case.” His eyes dart to mine, and I purse my lips to keep from smiling, glancing at my shoes.