Page 158 of Save You

It takes him a moment, then he says, “Yeah, actually,” in a kind of growl of agreement.“Things are different without her.”

“In what way?”

Out of the corner of my eye, I see his shoulders twitch.“There’s no buffer between me and Dad anymore.Lydia wants to take that role, but I’m doing my absolute best not to let that happen.I don’t want her to get stuck in the middle—least of all now.”

“How is she?I’ve hardly seen her this week.”

“Pretty good.I think.”He hesitates a moment.“I wish she’d just tell Sutton.But at the same time, I get why she doesn’t want to.”

“The whole situation is just total shit.”

“Yeah.”For a moment, he’s quiet, then he clears his throat.“So, how are you?”

I really don’t understand how a conversation can feel so normal and so weird at the same time.

“Good.I…um.I got an offer from St.Hilda’s too.”

“I knew it.They’d be total idiots if they didn’t take you,” he replies.“Congrats, Ruby.”

I glance at him in surprise.He looks seriously back at me.

I don’t know how he keeps doing this.One day he’s crushed, standing shivering on my doorstep, and the next he’s back at school, finding the strength to act like nothing happened.And now he seems totally unfazed, even though I know that last Saturday had an effect on him.

“Thanks,” I mumble.For a moment, I try to find the right words for what I want to say to him next.I’ve had since Monday to think about it, but right now, my mind has gone totally blank.“I’m sorry about what I said to you last weekend,” I start.“That was—”

“Ruby.”James tries to interrupt me, but I shake my head.

“I want to get over you,” I say quietly.“But being mean to you won’t make that any easier.I really am sorry.And it’s important to me that you know that.”

I feel his eyes on me.“There’s nothing for you to apologize for,” he whispers.

I don’t know how to answer that.The words sound bitter as he says them and I want to contradict him, but on the other hand, I’m scared that that will turn the conversation in a direction I’m not ready to go.I wanted to say sorry, and I’ve done that.At the moment, I don’t think I have the strength for anything more.

So I stay quiet and accelerate.The silence between us gets more and more awkward the longer it goes on, and after a while I can’t bear it any longer and turn on the radio.The cheerful popmusic on Mum’s favorite station is in stark contrast to the oppressive atmosphere between James and me.We spend the remaining fifteen minutes of the drive in silence, but I’m aware of his presence for every second.I hear his quiet breathing and sense when he moves beside me.And the heater might not be up very high, but just the thought that I’d only have to stretch out my hand to touch him makes me burn up.

I’m really glad when we get to the old business parking lot and I can finally get out of the car.The cold air feels so good on my flushed cheeks.

“It’s over that way,” I say, pointing to a unit with a colorful sign over the doorway.James comes to stand beside me and, as we set off, my arm brushes against his.

We’re both wearing thick coats.

But even so, the touch feels like an electric shock.

I take a step to the side as subtly as possible and hurry toward the door.I push it open and step into the small warehouse.

I look around.It looked way more inviting online.The pale yellow light offers the bare minimum of illumination, and the low ceilings are covered with spiderwebs.There are various electronic gadgets lying around, but most of the space is taken up by photo booths—at least twenty of them.There are small speakers playing garage music quietly, and a balding guy who’s sitting at a desk behind the narrow counter is nodding his head to the beat.

“Wow, nice shop you picked out,” James whispers, but before I can reply, the man sees us and gets up with a smile.

“You must be Ruby,” he says, coming over.

“That’s me,” I reply with a nod, taking his outstretched hand.“And this is James.”

They shake hands too.

“I’m Hank, and I’ll show you quickly how the photo booth works first.D’you want to come round?”He beckons us around the counter and then points at one of the booths.

“This is the one you went for, right?”he asks as we stand next to it.