Page 54 of Like You Want It

Over and over again.

His long finger stays inside of me and just slips and rubs and soothes and hurts. Because that’s what it is. It feels so good, sofuckinggood, that it hurts.

He lays his face on my thigh and watches me from between my legs.

“I love when you watch me,” I whisper, my eyes staying focused on him. “I love having your eyes on me. It turns me on so much.”

He groans and kisses my thigh, but never lets up on that special spot. And then his mouth returns to my clit. He flattens his tongue and licks and licks and then he sucks and I…

I let out a cry of debilitating pleasure and stark relief as my whole body becomes rigid, flush with tension when I hit that peak that we were searching for.

“Oh my god,” I manage to squeak out as my body freezes, then bucks and thrashes, my hips lifting from the ground so aggressively that he has to hold me down as he continues to stroke inside of me.

Meanwhile, I’m a puddle. A liquid mess continuing to jolt and bump and tumble with streaks of lightning tingling into every part of me, from the tip of my nose to the spaces between my toes, rippling across my skin in a wave.

And then, I’m still.

Spent.

Left smoldering like ashes on the floor.

I’m officially a medical miracle.

There are no bones left in my body.

I lay panting, sprawled out on the tile in the kitchen, like a rag doll. Limp but sated. I’m sure I look like fucking chaos, my body all lumpy with rolls and at all the wrong angles.

But I just can’t bring myself to care.

I have never had an orgasm likethatbefore. And we weren’t even having sex.

I stare up into Fin’s eyes, and I know right then and there that whatever is going to happen between us is going to flay me wide open. Cut me open and pour pieces of my soul out onto the pavement for everyone to see. And then he’s going to leave me there. But I can’t see any positives in trading away the certainty of happiness just because of the potential for pain.

He crawls over my body and looks at my face, then gently leans down and presses his lips to mine. Our tongues twist and stroke, and I bring my hand up to stroke his face, the slight bit of stubble tingling my fingers.

“I’m gonna have a rash from this in the morning,” I say, grinning and feeling no guilt about it whatsoever.

“Good,” he says, sweat coating his body in a sheen, his chest lifting up and down as he also tries to catch his own breath. “Gonna remember where I was when you’re doing your yoga. You’ll be stretching and something will pinch and you’ll flush, remembering how hard I made you come.”

I giggle with embarrassment, unable to really do anything else in the wake of those words. So I stroke his beard again.

“Were you allowed to have a beard in the military? I thought you had to keep it shaved?”

He rubs his beard into my chest and I giggle again. Then he looks up at me. “Sometimes I had one and sometimes I didn’t. It depends on the situation. Whether I was deployed or working on base, in uniform or not.” He looks back at my breasts and then licks a nipple, sucks on it slightly.

I moan and shift, wondering if this is going to be when we crawl into bed and have sex. Because I want to.

But he lets go of me and then rolls onto his back.

“I like that I get to decide now, though.”

He stays there, silent, just staring at the ceiling. So I roll over onto my stomach and lift to my knees to grab a blanket off the couch that butts up to the kitchen area. I wrap myself up and then stand, leaving Fin lying naked on the ground as I walk off to the bathroom to clean myself up.

I drop the blanket on my bedroom floor, then move quickly to the toilet, taking a seat and resting my head in my hands. I touch my lips, use one finger to trace their shape, feeling oddly like I just imagined the whole thing.

It was Fin. At my door. Wanting something.

I knew what he wanted. And I was willing to give it to him.