Page 72 of Ceremony of Lust

My eyes narrow in his direction. “Is this your subtle way of getting rid of me? Was that a good-bye fuck?”

He shakes his head. “No, Yael. No,” he insists. “What we did wasn’t a good-bye fuck.”

“Then what was it?”

With his hands on his hips, he drops his head and sighs. “It was . . . I don’t know what it was. A promise, maybe? Does it really matter? It was real. It was us.”

He steps toward the edge of the bed, leans over me, and presses his lips against my forehead. As I watch him leave, my heart breaks into a million pieces because for the first time, I realize what I feel for my husband runs deeper than mere lust. It might just be something close to love.

40

Zev

I’m a liar.And a fool. But mostly, I’m a liar.

I drive away without glancing back at our home because if I do, there’s a chance I won’t leave. Right now, leaving feels like my only option.

I have to make one last stop before heading out of town.

Fraser is waiting for me with a grim expression, and I know what he’s going to say before he even opens his mouth.

“I don’t want a lecture,” I tell him as a warning.

“Fine, I’ll just tell you you’re a fucking idiot,” he barks.

“Just keep an eye on my wife, okay? And if I’m not back by her birthday, you know what to do.”

“I’m not doing that,” he spits.

“Fraser.”

He shakes his head. “No, man. If you want to divorce that beautiful woman you’re lucky enough to call your wife, then you do it yourself. Or find yourself a new lawyer.”

“Do you think I want to leave her? This isn’t what I want, but you saw the video. You know how it looks.”

A few days ago, Fraser called to tell me the police had been given a surveillance video that appears to show me dumping a body in the river. The car in the video is definitely mine, but the man in the video is difficult to identify. It doesn’t matter whether it’s actually me in the video; what matters is how it looks.

“All you have to do is explain to the police—”

I raise my hands and stop him. “I know how they got that video, Fraser. It could only have come from one place: the Elders. They need to be stopped once and for all.”

Fraser sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “Fine. Just tell me where you’re going.”

“No. The less you know, the better. I told Yael I was working, but even I’m not stupid enough to think she believed my lies.”

“Then you should probably leave,” Fraser says with a hard look. “The cops will be looking for your car soon, if they aren’t already.”

I nod. “I know. Thank you for helping me protect Yael and my child.”

“Just make sure you come back.”

We shake hands, and I slide back into my car to start the long journey of freeing myself from the Elders once and for all. There is a chance my plan will backfire, and I’ll still end up in prison or, worse, dead. It’s a chance worth taking.

I drive a few hours out of town, ditch my car in an empty parking lot, and take a cab to the closest car dealership. I don’t care what kind of cars they sell, only that I can purchase a new one quickly and with cash. When that task is complete, I drive back to Ripley, to my penthouse where all my secrets have been hidden.

It’s dark when I step off the elevator into the foyer. It’s so much bigger now that it’s completely empty of furniture, but instantly, I’m hit with memories of Yael. They’re so fresh, as if they only happened yesterday. Every square inch of this place reminds me of her, and I have to continuously stop myself from leaving and running back to her.

The security cameras are still on, still recording, and I know Anders has been here snooping a few times, which suggests he suspects what I have and is eager to get his hands on it. He doesn’t know where it’s hidden, though.