Page 69 of Ceremony of Lust
I try the handle of the door, turn it, and am surprised when it swings open. Yael looks up at me with red eyes. Her dark hair limp around her shoulders, and her face pale. Sinking to my knees, I crawl toward her. “What’s wrong?” I ask, reaching out to push a lock of her hair behind her ear. “You’ve been sick for days.”
“It’s finally happened,” she whispers.
“What happened?”
“I’m pregnant,” she says with a sad, lopsided smile.
I sit back, shocked. “How do you know? Did you take a test?”
She nods. “When you went to the police station for questioning. I took one that day.”
“And you waited all this time to tell me?”
She sniffles and wipes her cheeks with the back of her hands. “It’s hard for me to even think about being pregnant right now with everything else happening.”
I reach an arm out, and she scrambles toward me, clutching me around the neck. “Nothing is going to happen to me. Fraser was with me, and he doesn’t think I’m a suspect. We don’t have anything to worry about.”
Even as I speak those words, I don’t believe them. Anders will do almost anything to keep me under his thumb, and he’s been too quiet lately. Everything I’ve been asked to take care of has come from the other Elders, and the tasks were nothing out of the ordinary.
I can’t stop living my life while I wait for Anders to make his move.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you right away,” she murmurs, wiping her tears against my chest.
“It’s okay. I understand why you waited.” I place a kiss on top of her head and hold her until she relaxes. “Do you want to go back to bed, or do you still feel sick?”
“Bed,” she answers. As I lift her into my arms and then stand, she leans her head against my shoulder. “You don’t have to keep carrying me.”
“I’ll do what I like,” I tease, eating up the short distance between the bathroom and the bed with long, slow strides. I lay her gently onto the bed and ask her if she needs anything. “Tea? Crackers? Ginger ale?”
Her smile lights up the darkened room. “I’m fine.”
As I settle in beside her, I nuzzle my face against her neck. “Wake me if you feel sick again.”
We fall asleep wrapped around each other, like interconnecting pieces of the same puzzle. When I wake, she’s still sound asleep. I’m careful to extricate myself from her, not wanting to wake her because she’s been up the entire night. I dress quickly, pulling on a pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt before heading out to the café down the street. Yael loves their chocolate chip muffins. On my way home, I stop by a florist as well and pick up a bouquet of mixed flowers. I have no idea what’s in it, only that it’s pink and looks happy.
When I return home to the quiet house, it finally dawns on me I’m going to be a father. Holy shit. I glance up the stairs, thinking about the young woman, still a child in so many ways, who is not only my wife but also the mother of my child. My chest tightens and then finally swells with pride. I’m going to be a father.
My phone rings as I’m getting everything settled. It’s Fraser. Our conversation is quick.
“Just wanted to let you know the paperwork has been prepared and is ready for you to sign,” he tells me.
“All of it?” I ask with a hint of skepticism.
“Yes,” he snaps. “Do you want to come to my office and sign, or do you want me to bring everything to you?”
“You charge more for house calls. I’ll see you in a bit.”
I check on Yael, who is still asleep, and set the vase bursting with flowers on the table next to the bed along with the pink box from the café down the street. I scribble out a note telling her I had to run an errand and would be back soon.
Fraser has the stack of paperwork waiting for me when I arrive at his office. Most of the documents are easy enough, but he hesitates to hand me the last set.
“Are you sure about this?” he asks.
“It’s a last resort, Fraser, but I want it in place in the event something happens to me.”
“Something like what? Like being charged with Leann’s murder?”
“Yes. I keep waiting for something to happen.”