Page 145 of Rah

I nodded, too choked up to speak.

Mama smiled softly through her tears. “You got a whole army behind you, baby. You’re not doing this alone.”

I looked between them and took in their tired faces, touched that they were trying so hard to hold me together.

I nodded, but no words would come out.

From the hallway, Elijah called out, “Mama, can you come read our letters now?”

I tried to smile so that he couldn’t hear my sorrow. “Yeah, baby! I’m coming.”

As I went back down that hall, I wiped my face clean and straightened my shoulders. My kids didn’t need to see the broken version of me. They needed to think mama was unshakable, even if I was falling apart inside.

Before I could even make it back to the living room, the doorbell rang.

It was late, and I wasn’t expecting anyone. I frowned, wondering who it could be.

I’d already forced Kahlani to go home earlier that afternoon. She’d been up under me every day that week. I loved her for it, but she was starting to neglect her man and baby.

When the bell rang again, I walked to the door, glanced through the peephole, and froze.

It was Fabe.

I hesitated for a second, wondering why he’d show up unannounced, then unlocked the door and opened it.

“Hey,” he greeted, looking nervous.

Before I could even respond, Elijah and Essence were already rushing over.

“Uncle Fabe!” Elijah grinned.

Essence’s face lit up too, even though she tried to play it cool. “What you doin’ here?”

Fabe smiled at them both and reached down to hug them. “I just needed to talk to your mama for a second,” he told Essence.

“Go finish your letters. Let me talk to your uncle,” I told them.

Once they were back on the floor with their pens, Fabe and I slipped into my bedroom nearby. I shut the door behind us.

He sighed heavily before speaking. “I’m sorry, Solae.”

My eyes narrowed as I sat on the foot of the bed. “What are you sorry for?”

“For everything. For my brother. For what he did to you. I know ‘sorry’ don’t fix it, but I wanted to say it anyway because somebody should. You’re owed an apology.”

“You don’t have to apologize for him, Fabe. He made his own choices.”

“I know. He’s my brother, but I can’t even pretend like he didn’t deserve what happened. I know he pushed you too far.”

Tears filled my eyes, but I blinked them back. “I’m glad to hear you say that. Everybody else in his family’s been acting like Rah is a Saint.”

“That’s ‘cause they don’t know him like I do,” he said. “Rah is…Rah. Always manipulating, always hurting the people who loves him most. You don’t deserve to carry that guilt.” Then he added softly, “I just wanted you to know I got you. I’m gonna look out for your kids while you’re gone. Whatever they need, I’ll make sure they have it.”

That brought more tears to my eyes. “Thank you, Fabe. That means more than you know.”

He nodded, looking down for a moment before I asked, “Can I ask you something?”

“Of course.”