Page 118 of Rah

I knew that Elijah missed me because he had been telling me so through phone calls through his grandparents. But Essence was her mama’s daughter, with just as much attitude. She barely spoke. “Hey.”

“What’s your problem?” I asked her.

“Nothing,” she spat.

“Yeah, that’s why I had to make sure that I started back spending time with y’all so I can fix your attitude. Your mama let you get away with too much shit.”

She just stared out of the window like she didn’t want to be there. I shook my head at how much she resembled Solae and twisted back around. I put my ride in drive and pulled out of the parking lot, but I continued fussing, “You better fix your attitude, Essence. What’s wrong with you?”

“I just wanted to stay home,” she whined.

“Why? You don’t wanna see your daddy?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“You don’t have to say it. It seems like it. I don’t know why you wanna be under your mama so tough. She’s the reason we’re all in this mess. She tried to kill me. She’s crazy. She’s the reason why y’all was in that home, the reason why that happened to you, Essence. She don’t be looking after y’all. But your daddy got you, girl. Soon as this shit is over and your mama go away forever–”

“She’s going away forever?!” Elijah blurted, sounding like he was about to burst in tears.

“Of course, she is,” I told him.

Essence sucked her teeth and finally had something to say. “No, she isn’t!”

“Yes, she is. That’s what happens to violent people. They gotta go away for the rest of their lives. But no worries. Daddy is going to take care of y’all.”

I could hear Elijah sniffling. He was crying and that was okay. He needed to get used to the fact that they weren’t going to have their mother anymore. I was intent on it. If the court didn’t put her ass away, I was going to kill the bitch. Either way, she was going to pay.

“Don’t cry, my dude,” I told Elijah. “Don’t be sad. We’re about to have a good day. Don’t you miss your Uncle Fabe?”

Elijah perked up. Looking through the rearview mirror, I saw him smile a bit and wipe his face. Essence just continued to stare out of the window. I was definitely going to have to break her out of that attitude once I had them to myself.

“Yeah, I miss Uncle Fabe. We’re going to his house?” Elijah asked with excitement.

“Yeah, man. So, buckle up.”

He put his seatbelt on and so did Essence, and I got back on the expressway, on my way to the south suburbs. I didn’tremember where Fabe lived exactly, so I shot my father a text message asking him for the address. Seconds later, he had replied with the full address. I pressed the gas harder, going eighty, eager to get to Fabe’s crib.

I had been hitting Fabe up for weeks, curious about why he had faded to black on me. Ever since I got out of the hospital, I hadn’t seen him, and he had started to answer my calls less and less. He blamed it on being overwhelmed with his hustle, but something was telling me otherwise.

AALIYAH

I sighed with relief as I pulled into the alley behind Fabe’s house. It had been a long day at the hospital with Junior for his doctor’s appointments. I was ready to get into the house and out of this cold. It was almost March by now. Everyone was getting excited about Spring coming, but there wasn’t a sight of it in the weather.

I parked in my spot where I always did to keep Rah from seeing my car if he ever did happen to drive by. It was a vacant garage attached to a house that was for sale. He had gotten permission from the owner for me to park there. But I was thankful that Fabe was right. Ever since I had moved in, Rah had never come to see his brother. I wasn’t surprised, though. Rah was so full of himself that he never went out of his way to see how the next person was doing.

I climbed out of the car and hurriedly got Junior out of his car seat in the back. Then I rushed out of the parking lot and up the alley towards the house. The Chicago wind was brutal that day. It was smacking me in my face like it had beef with me. AsI hurried up the alley, I ensured that Junior’s face was covered by the blanket.

“Whoo,” I sighed again as I finally got the back door open and let myself in.

I could hear music playing, so I figured Fabe was in the living room working out. I closed the door behind myself. Now, standing in the kitchen, I got ready to kick off my shoes when I heard a chilling chuckle.

My heart stopped. Rah was there. I stood still, frozen with fear.

Then Junior started to stir and make those noises as if he was going to cry. I ripped the blanket off him and covered his mouth. With tears in my eyes, I rushed towards the door. He was starting to cry, but I was holding him with one hand and muffling his cries with the other. In order to open the door, I would have to move my hand from over his mouth. I stood in the kitchen, barely able to breathe, praying that the song wouldn’t go off before I figured out what to do. I could hear Rah’s voice now through their muffled conversation. I even heard the voice of a small boy. I stood there listening for the voices to come nearer and rocking Junior to soothe him so that he would stop whining.

But I wasn’t about to take the chance. I went for it, quickly grabbing the knob and snatching the door open. The wind met my face again, whipping into my eyes. I closed the door as fast and quietly as I could. Just like a child, when I needed him to be quiet, he wouldn’t, but now that the coast was clear, Junior was quiet as a church mouse.

“I can’t live like this,” I spat as I made my way back up the alley towards my car.