Page 15 of Life After Me

She clomped down the stairs and dropped the bag on the hall floor with a thump, then peered into the dish on top of the bookcase, where we keep our keys. She lifted it up, then tutted in annoyance and yelled for David.

‘Dad, have you seen my keys?’

‘I thought you took them upstairs.’

‘I thought I did too.’ Lottie dropped to her knees and tore open the zip on her bag. She yanked the clothes out, shaking them and chucking them haphazardly to one side. ‘They’re not in my bag.’

‘Have you tried the bookcase?’

‘Already looked there.’ Lottie pursed her lips thoughtfully. ‘I could have sworn I left them on the dressing table. If I don’t leave soon I’m going to catch all the traffic.’

‘I’ll help you look,’ David offered, ever the good father.

Forty-five minutes later they’d pulled the house half-apart, yanking out drawers, scouring Lottie’s bedroom, searching through the hall and living room, even pulling books off the shelves.

I laughed when Lottie opened the fridge and peered inside.

Nice try kiddo, but not good enough. She slammed the door shut, making the bottles rattle.

‘I’ve got no idea where they are. This is freaking ridiculous. Keys don’t just grow legs and walk away!’

David sighed and ran his hand through his hair, clearly getting frustrated with his scatty daughter. ‘You must have put them somewhere.’

‘I didn’t! I last saw them on the dressing table.’

‘All right, all right.’ David held up his hands in surrender. ‘I’ll check your room again. You look down here.’

‘What’s the point? We’ve already looked everywhere.’

‘They have to be somewhere.’ David climbed the stairs tiredly.

Lottie groaned and grabbed the cushions off the sofa, throwing them to the floor in frustration.

She pulled the sofa apart, yanking out the seats and running her hands down the sides and underneath.

After a few minutes she gave up and stared at the ceiling, hands on her hips as she huffed and puffed.

‘That’s it, they’re not here. It looks like I’m staying whether I like it or not! ’

‘What was that?’ David’s voice echoed down the stairs.

‘Nothing.’ Lottie shook her head.

‘Oh.’ David sounded disappointed.

I gave Lottie a gentle nudge. She sighed and folded her arms. ‘It’s just, well...’ She wandered out to the hall. ‘If I didn’t know better, I’d think I was being told to stay here.’

Upstairs, I felt David freeze. ‘I suppose you could.’ He tried not to sound too eager. ‘If that’s what you want.’

I stared at Lottie, wanting to scream at her to say yes.

‘All right. I suppose I can stay for a bit longer. I don’t have to be back for a few more days. I’ll stay at least until the weekend.’ Lottie stuffed her hands in her pockets and sauntered back to the living room.

I smiled to myself. That was exactly what I’d wanted to hear. Mission accomplished.

Lottie grabbed the cushions from the floor and stuffed them back into place, thumping them a few times for good measure.

She collapsed on the sofa with a sigh, and froze at the soft jangle.

Surprised, she bounced up and down, listening carefully.

‘I don’t believe it.’ She jumped to her feet and lifted the cushion again.

The keys sat underneath it innocently, spread out in a perfect star around their ring.

‘What the...?’ Lottie stared at the keys, astonished.

Surely she’d checked there a few seconds ago?

No one else had been in the room. ‘Um, Dad? I’ve found them. ’

* * *

So you can see why I’m feeling slightly guilty, although I’m struggling to feel that bad about it, because Lottie’s staying a bit longer and I think it’s what they both need right now.

I watched as David crept down the stairs, leaned over the banister, and carefully shut the hall door. I wondered what he was doing, so followed him back up the stairs. He sat on the edge of our bed and grinned. ‘I know you’re here.’

I stared at him in surprise.

‘I can feel you all around me, Jenn. When you’re here the air changes slightly.

Do you remember when Lottie was little and kept using all your bath salts?

How she said they made the water feel softer?

Well that’s what this is like. I know you’re here because the air feels.

.. softer.’ He paused and rubbed his eyes tiredly. ‘I miss you so much.’

I miss you too. I wish I could tell you how much, but I don’t have any way to let you know. I still love you. I’m here.

‘Oh my God.’ David shook his head. ‘I can’t believe I’m talking to a... ghost. A month ago I didn’t even believe in them. I half-think I’m going insane.’

I wanted to reach out to him and reassure him, to let him know I was still there and that he wasn’t going mad.

On the bed David smiled. He leaned back and tucked his hands behind his head. ‘I can feel it when you do that. At least I think I can.’ He shook his head. ‘You know, that was a pretty rotten thing to do to Lottie.’ His eyes creased with amusement. ‘But thanks.’

I settled next to him, pouring love, happiness and reassurance into him.