Page 63

Malia

I thought it was the right thing to do, pushing him away from me to protect him, but what if I was wrong? Maybe I was just scared and panicked and tried to grasp at straws to regain control of the situation.

I don’t even know at this point.

I know very little right now, but despite all this unclarity, one thing I’m sure of. And he’s right in front of me.

"I’m sorry I hurt you.

I didn’t want to say any of those things, but we didn’t have time to talk, and Flint would have taken everything from you.

I couldn’t let that happen. " It’s hard to hold his gaze steadily, but I make myself go through with it away.

"Even if he had taken away my job and ruined my reputation, I would’ve still had the most important thing, Malia.” He gives my hand a squeeze, a slow smile taking over his handsome features.

“Seriously, how could you think that I would rather lose you than anything else?" he asks as if it was the most natural thing, and I almost jump up to kiss him.

It’s been way too long since I’ve seen him smile.

"I guess when you say it like that, it does seem a little silly.

Obviously, anyone in their right mind would choose me over everything they’ve ever worked for.

Then again, I’m not sure if you are in your right mind." His eyes seem to brighten now that a smile tugs on my own lips and my sarcasm is back.

"I’ve wanted to be the best guard ever since I could remember." His voice turns earnest.

"It was my one goal in life, and I’ve thrown away my childhood for it.

Most of it, at least. Do you know what the only genuinely happy memories I have of that time are? The times we spent in the library, for example. Just the times you were around, even if we were teasing each other or fighting.

"You challenged me and forced me to grow with it.

I saw you smiling at the people that showed you kindness, and those were the only times I ever wanted to be nice.

It’s pathetic how desperately I wanted to be at the receiving end of it."

"It’s not pathetic," I interrupt him.

He chuckles and squeezes my hand again.

"What I’m trying to say is that you made me realize that there were more important things than being the best and most feared, even if I was too stubborn to act on it for a long time.

"Also, if there’s ever a time you think I need to choose between having you and anything else again, let me choose.

Because we don’t see eye-to-eye on this, clearly." I chuckle and he responds with another warm smile that makes me melt to the core.

"Now, how are you feeling?" he asks.

"Good, honestly.

I don’t think I’ve ever gotten rest like that.

It was weird, felt like I was floating while the time passed super quickly."

"Could you hear what was going on around you?"

"Not a single thing.

Why? Did I miss an important revelation?" I give him a knowing smirk.

"Sure, I poured my heart out to you.

You actually let me speak for once." He winks at me.

"I did talk to you, a lot, but it was mostly random. I really didn’t know what else to do so I just kept going.” His voice softens. “You shouldn’t have done that. Not for me, not for anyone. Ever."

"Keahi," I try to interrupt him, but he won’t let me.

"Seriously Malia, what were you thinking? Pulling your energy right from the source! That was stupid and dangerous and frankly, I’m not worth all that.

If you had never woken up-"

"You let.

Me.

Speak!" I tell him while straightening on the bed. "You were dying, and I could stop it. Now, don’t even dream about giving me the I’m-not-worth-your-life speech because I simply didn’t do it for you. Believe it or not, but it would have killed me if you died. I, therefore, made the selfish decision to do anything in my power to prevent having to endure that.

"I wholeheartedly believe that I’ve been through enough to last a lifetime, so if sleeping for five days is what it takes to wake up to your voice, then so be it.

I don’t regret doing it.

Hell, I’d do it all over again and nothing you say can change that.

"Other than that, you so deserved to wait for me to wake up for almost dying on me.

Nope, I’m not letting this go anytime soon, so get used to it.

And get used to my presence because I don’t want fucking space and neither do you. Did I get it right?" I ask with a raised eyebrow, daring him to disagree. Keahi looks dumbfounded for a second before he acts so suddenly, I don’t process it until his lips are on mine.

I whine against his mouth as the familiar feeling I’ve yearned for so long settles in my stomach.

Fuck butterflies, this is all mulled-wine-after-freezing-your-ass-off.

It’s the first summer night of the year. I’d even go there and say this is winning the lottery times and times over. It is everything.

Keahi kisses me slowly as if he’s trying to savor this moment to the fullest and use it to remind him I’m really here.

Meanwhile, I have my own agenda.

My body is aching for him to hold me tight and kiss me fiercely, to make me feel how much he’s missed me and let me know he needs me like I need him.

But you know what they say, if you want something done right, you have to do it yourself.

That is just what I intend.

I pull Keahi closer by his arms before tangling my hands in his curly hair and tugging on it.

He moans into my mouth, and I swallow the sound like a starving woman, warmth licking at my spine.

I pull him back with me until I’m on the bed and he’s towering over me, all without breaking the kiss.

Keahi’s lips draw back, but before I can voice my complaint, his lips attach themselves to my neck, drawing a moan from me instead.

I tilt my head to the side to give him more space, each contact of his lips against my sensitive skin evoking fireworks.

My hands down his muscled torso until I find the bottom of his shirt, greedily tugging on it until Keahi lets me pull it over his head.

I pull back, taking him in in all his glory, and falter.

He’s got smooth golden-brown skin stretching over each of his cut muscles. I run a tentative hand over it as a rare bout of insecurity hits me. So smooth. Untarnished. It reminds me of the scars that used to litter my chest and the ones that still mark the front of my legs and the length of my back. In the face of his perfection, I feel ruined.

Keahi must note my hesitance.

One of his calloused hands cups my cheek gently, dragging my gaze back to his searching eyes.

“You don’t like what you see?” he teases half-heartedly.

I shake my head with a weak smile.

“You’re perfect.”

“Then why are you frowning?” He runs his thumb over the seam of my lips ever so gently, his eyes still boring into mine as if he could find the answer himself if he just looked hard enough.

“I don’t know.

I’m sorry.” I lean forward in an attempt to catch his lips with mine, getting back on track, but he keeps me back with the hand on my cheek.

“Can you tell me what made you sad, please?” he asks so damn politely.

I blow out a breath.

“It’s stupid.

I was just thinking about my scars and how messed up I am next to you.

I mean, you saw my stomach and chest. It was so hideous you went great lengths to make them disappear, but I have more, and I’m not ready to wipe them away as if nothing ever happened. I don’t even know why, but the thought makes my skin itch. And it’s got me thinking maybe I’m more damaged than you signed up for.” I avert my eyes, scared to see the same realization dawn on him. What if this is where he decides to cut his losses? I want him, and I know he wants the idea of me too, but maybe I can’t be what he needs. I’m not the same girl he used to know.

“Is that why you think I healed those scars? Oh, Princess.

I didn’t know they meant something to you, that’s why I did it.

I couldn’t grasp their meaning or origin back then, and I wasn’t exactly in the right frame of mind, seeing you so hurt just before. I might struggle with their origin – I hate knowing you were in that dark cell by yourself while they caused you so much pain – but they show how strong you are.

“You could never, ever be hideous in my eyes, so don’t ever worry about my not finding even a single part of you up to par.

Scars or no scars, you are everything I ever dreamed of and more, okay? You’ve occupied my every thought for most of my life, one way or another.

It would be an understatement to say I crave you, and nothing has or will ever change that.”

I nod, trying my hardest to make every last part of me believe his words.

To soak them up and quench the prodding insecurities.

“Show me,” I finally whisper.

I note the sparkle in his eyes for a second before his lips are on mine with a new-found conviction.

His hands are braced on each side of my face reverently, as if shielding me from the rest of the world as he pulls me closer. My hands are trapped between our bodies, the length of my arms pressed against his warm skin, and I shiver at the feel of it.

He walks and turns us with small steps and I follow blindly, trusting him to take the lead.

When he sits down on the edge of my bed, I go with him, climbing on his lap without ever breaking the kiss.

My hands find his hair while his arms encircle me, hugging me close so that I can feel our hearts racing in sync against each other. It almost feels like my heart is trying to pound its way out of my ribcage, eager to meet the man it belongs to.

A single finger teasingly trails down my spine, leaving goosebumps in its wake.

Once he reaches my lower back, his hands flatten on my body and move over the curve of my ass until they stay on my thighs.

He pulls my bottom lip between his lips right when the double doors open. I yelp, my eyes flying open, and make an effort to jump off Keahi’s lap only for his hands to tighten on my legs to keep me in place.

In walks Flint, who grimaces and stops dead in his tracks when he sees us.

"Oh, geez.

I haven’t even been gone for an hour, you animals! At least have the decency to get away from each other and pretend I didn’t just walk in on whatever this is.

I’m both of your superior!" he exclaims, and I make another effort to get off the bed, blushing all the way to the tips of my ears.

"We’re comfortable right here.

Just get what you forgot," Keahi says casually, squeezing my thighs once.

I blush more, mortified but incredibly turned on by this confident, defiant side of Keahi all at once. Turning my head, I bury my face into the crook of his neck to shy away from Flint’s gaze.

The man mutters curses under his breath all the way out of the room and I burst out laughing once the door closes and he’s out of earshot.

"We probably traumatized him," I say while Keahi smiles up at me.

"He’ll live." He tucks a stray strand of hair behind my ear while looking as though I’m the most mesmerizing being out there.

His hand finds its way to the back of my neck, and he pulls me toward him until our foreheads are pressed together, making my heart flutter.

"What now?" I whisper.

"Now as in this moment or us in general? The answer to the first one is we leave this bed-" I whine but he goes on with a chuckle.

"The second answer is, you’re going to let me take you out tonight.

I’m not done showing you what you mean to me and I won’t be for a long time, so a date seems like a good place to start." I open my eyes to check if he’s serious.

"Look at you bringing out the big guns, charmer,” I tease him since he’s obviously not joking.

I sigh heavily before pretending to be considering his offer.

"I guess, only because you asked so nicely, I will honor you with my presence this evening."

"Why, thank you, love.

That’s very generous of you." Love.

My heart skips a beat.

"Mhm, that’s new.

What happened to Princess?"

"Figured it’s time for an upgrade.

Unless you want to stick with Princess."

"Oh no.

I like it.

I like both," I say a little too quickly. At least I’m rewarded with a cocky grin and a lingering kiss.

"I knew you’d like it," Keahi whispers so damn deeply I want to never leave this bed.

"You know, we could just stay here all night," I propose if only to have him this close for a little longer.

A date sounds great, of course, but staying in Keahi’s arms sounds nearly better.

"Mh, am I leaving you all hot and bothered, love? We can’t have that, can we?" he muses.

His body twists underneath mine, taking me with him easily so that he ends up on top of me with his hands bracing my face left and right.

I suck in a breath at how quickly he manhandled me into this position and the heat blazing in his eyes.

“We can stay here for a little longer if that’s what you want,” he drawls as the back of his fingers glide over the exposed skin of my stomach where my shirt has ridden up.

The heat of his touch sends a shot of pleasure straight between my legs, and a sliver of nerves has me taking hurried breaths.

Still, anticipation builds within me as he slips his fingers beneath the waistline of my pants only to do the same on the edge of my panties.

"What are you doing?" I ask, unable to mask the small hitch in my breath.

"Are you asking me to stop?" Some of the heat in his eyes wanes, some clarity returning as he pulls away.

“Maybe we should wait.

You only just woke up, after all.”

I shake my head since I seem to have positively lost my voice, and Keahi looks so satisfied with himself that I want to hit him for it.

Instead, I gently bring my hand to cup his flawless cheek.

“We’ve waited for years. I think that’s enough, don’t you agree?”

I press my lips to his and start kissing him again.

I’m so lost in the sensation of his soft tongue dancing with mine, I barely notice his hand slipping all the way beneath my panties until his finger moves up and down my slit once.

He stretches his hand, and I catch the hint and spread my legs a little. Nerves crash over me and a fierce blush stains my cheeks, but I mask it by kissing Keahi deeper.

My hands settle on his shoulder blades to pull him closer.

Our lips are moving in sync, although my senses are now solely focused on his hand between my legs and what it’s doing, waiting for him to give me whatever he wants.

He’s teasing me; rubbing two of his fingers around my clit but never quite touching it.

I try to shily move against his hand a couple of times, but he just pulls his hand away each time and tsked me.

Not that I’m complaining, him scolding me has something to it. Every time he denies me any sort of control, my skin burns up a little hotter and my lower lips get a little slicker. Maybe I’ll let him tell me what to do just this once.

"Keahi," I practically beg after more minutes of him teasing me tickle by.

Finally, he applies pressure to the spot I need him, shifting his thumb to stroke my pulsing clit.

Oh, stars. My back arches up, my legs straining to cross over his hand to keep him there. The friction is heavenly, bringing every last of my cells alive like a wildfire.

“You like that?” he asks, pulling away to look me in the eye as his finger applies pressure to the bundle of nerves.

I nod repeatedly, pulling his head back down for another kiss since I can’t handle the intensity.

Just what his hand is doing has me quivering. Add the heat of his gaze and I don’t know how to handle it.

A tingle starts at the base of my spine.

I pull him impossibly closer, feeling the heat of his body seep into mine.

I regret not having taken off my shirt earlier. I’d love to find out how his warm skin feels pressed up against my bare chest.

Keahi’s movements pick up speed and I arch my back against him.

Closer, I need him closer.

As if he hears my thoughts, he spreads my legs wider with one of his own and leans onto me. I bite down on his bottom lip.

"Look at you fighting so hard to make this moment to last," Keahi whispers against my neck, and goosebumps spread all over me.

He presses a kiss to my sensitive skin there before leveling his eyes with mine.

"Don’t worry, love, we have all the time in the world. I’ll enjoy having you beneath me, writhing and sweating with pleasure for as long as you’ll have me."

Shit.

I tense the muscles in my legs, my hips trying to move against his skillful fingers despite knowing his weight is pinning me down too firmly to allow it.

I whine, feeling like I’m going to explode with my orgasm so nearly within reach.

Just when I think Keahi will allow me my release, his fingers halt over my clit, dipping down to my wet entrance.

I groan in frustration, but the sound quickly turns into a moan when one of his fingers slides into me without any resistance.

He curls it inside me, slowly as if testing the waters, and I bury my face in his neck, biting down on his smooth skin just slightly at the unfamiliar sensation.

There wasn’t really much time to be intimate with myself back at camp, and seeing as I had a roommate back at the academy, things like this, even just with myself, took the back seat.

Keahi pulls his finger out and circles my clit twice before pushing into me with two.

I clench down around him, savoring the feeling of what he’s doing as I breathe in his scent.

He groans slightly, still moving inside of me.

“Fuck, Princess, you’re holding on to me so tightly.

Like you never want me to leave.” He turns his face, kissing the top of my head as his thumb resumes its assault on my clit. I damn near lose it right there, clenching around his fingers again if only to hear him groan one more time.

His weight shifts above me as he pulls back a little, enabling me to move my hips and chase the feeling that’s been gradually building in my lower stomach.

Meanwhile, Keahi starts sucking and nibbling on the skin of my neck, occasionally telling me how crazy I’m driving him.

I drink it all up.

Every kiss, every touch, every word.

All of it. Until it finally becomes too much, and I throw my head back into the pillow with one last jerk of my hips. I bite down on my lip to keep down the noise, thanking the stars no one is injured.

Keahi doesn’t stop moving as the orgasm rushes over me in waves, and it’s all I can do to bury my nails deeper into his shoulders as his eyes lock onto mine.

Only when my breathing has evened out and my body is relaxed does Keahi take his hand out of my pants to lick his fingers clean.

A bout of shame washes over my face, but before I can feel too embarrassed, his heated eyes meet mine, and that’s enough to shut my insecurities up.

Once his fingers are clean, he leans down to kiss me, letting me taste myself on his tongue.

I kiss him back greedily, almost dizzy from all the sensations.

"How was that, Princess?" he asks, making my chest feel all warm and fuzzy.

He turns his body so he can lie down next to me on the narrow bed, gathering me in his arms.

“That was amazing.” I cuddle in further against him, soaking up the peace and warmth he emits.