Page 30 of Always Been You

Dyami

T oday was so lovely spending time with Marcos and his son.

I was nervous that it would be awkward, but honestly, it wasn’t.

I felt like I fell right in step, being at his mom’s house with them all.

I didn’t think I could do the stepmother thing at first, but maybe it wouldn’t be as complicated as I thought.

I wanted kids, so this could help me with what was to come, I’m sure.

I was just happy for once in my life. Genuinely.

I didn’t feel like the person I was with was hiding something from me.

He made me a part of everything in his life.

I was so worked up that I went to visit Chante after Marcos dropped me off. The way I was feeling inside a FaceTime call wouldn’t do it. I was going to be lonely and missing him if I stayed home by myself, so I decided to have an impromptu girls’ night.

“Bitch why are you over there grinning?” Chante said from across the counter, where we were sitting.

“Not too much on me. I’m just thinking about my man.”

“Girl, I ain’t even mad at you, cuz my boo coming over as soon as you leave,” she chuckled.

“That’s what’s up. I see y’all getting serious. What's the status?”

“We're taking everything slow. He is trying to apply some pressure, but I love the dating stage. We just met a few weeks ago. I really want to get to know him before I make that type of commitment. But I will say this, he has his shit together and that dick is EVERYTHING!”

“I thought they said chubby niggas got the small dicks.”

“No chile. He is packing, and he knows how to swing it. He be having me climbing the walls!”

We both laughed and slapped high fives. I was glad it was happening for both of us.

We were career women, but at the end of the day, no matter how independent a woman is, she wants a good man she can depend on.

I was glad I didn’t have to take on life by myself anymore and deal with everything for my mom and sister with no help.

I would wake up in the morning to find Marcos had left me money.

At first, I would oppose it, but after a while, I understood that he did it simply because he could, and he was there to help me make my life easier.

I could do the same for him. I was letting my guard down, and it felt like this could turn into a forever kind of thing. I didn’t want to get ahead of myself.

“I think I may be falling for him, Chante.”

“Think? Girl, yo’ ass den fell already, got back up and fell again. Ain’t nothing wrong with it though. You know we gotta keep our eyes open just in case,” she said, taking a sip of her Merlot.

My phone started to ring, and it was an unknown number. I let it go to voicemail. It rang again, and even though I didn’t answer calls, I didn’t know something deep inside made me to do it anyway.

“Hello.”

“Yes, is this Dyami Taylor?”

“Yes, this is me,” I said, feeling a different kind of unease in the pit of my stomach.

“Your mother was found unresponsive, and we believe it is a possible overdose. Can you please come to Hurley Hospital as soon as possible?”

The phone dropped from my hands and hit the floor.

I felt numb. I knew one day a call like this might come, but nothing compared to hearing those words I just heard.

Was she dead? I hadn’t seen her since the day she tried to snatch my purse and steal money from me.

The guilt from the things I said to her hit me like a ton of bricks.

Lord, please don’t let that be my last words to my mother. I didn’t want that on my conscience.

“Dyami!”

“Dyami, please talk to me, you are scaring me, girl, what’s going on?” Chante said, rocking me. I looked at her in a fog, but I was somehow able to respond.

“It’s Momma, she overdosed. I got to go,” I said, heading towards the door.

“OH MY GOD! Dyami, I’m going with you. I’m not letting you drive like this,” she said, scurrying around the house and grabbing her things.

She passed me by. She was moving so quickly.

We got into her car, and we prayed so hard on the way to the hospital.

I knew my mom’s addiction was getting worse.

I really didn’t know how to help her. I know there were times when I could have tried harder.

I was just overwhelmed with my own life.

How the hell could I explain this to Trina?

This would break her. She shouldn’t have to deal with this right now.

Oh my God, what was I going to do if I lost my mother?

“Girl, go in. I’m gonna park, but it’s gonna be okay. I’m coming right behind you,” Chante said, pulling me to the front of the hospital.

I jumped out before she could even come to a complete stop.

I bolted into the hospital, heading for the elevator, and rode it up to the floor where they had her.

I was pulling my damn hair out. I was shaking and crying the whole way up.

I was trying to pull myself together, but I just couldn’t. I ran to the desk.

“I’m here to see about my mother, Denise Taylor.”

“Yes, just one moment. Have a seat in the waiting room, I’ll let the doctor know you’re here,” the stout receptionist said.

“Please, can you just tell me if she is okay?”

“I’m sorry, I know this is frustrating, but I don’t have any information.

I’ll let the doctor know you are here,” she said, getting out of her seat, and I went to the waiting area.

I was pacing the floor, and I couldn’t sit down.

I called Marcos a few times, and he didn’t answer.

I figured he may have been putting MJ down.

When Chante got up there, I was still pacing.

“What’s up? What they tell you?” She asked.

“Nothing yet.”

“It’s going to be okay, girl. Everything will be fine,” she said, trying to console me.

“Dyami Taylor,” I heard a voice call. I looked up and saw a white man in a lab coat.

“That’s me. Is she okay?” I spoke quickly.

“Come with me.”

I followed behind him into a private room and sat down anxiously. I just needed answers at this point, and I was tired of waiting.

“Your mother was found in an abandoned building, and she had overdosed on drugs. Right now, we are doing everything we can, but she is unresponsive and in a comatose state. We are watching things very closely. The biggest tell sign will be how she does overnight.”

I hung my head down, and tears slipped from my face onto the floor.

I was holding it together, then it turned into a full-blown cry.

I wailed and I screamed. Why was this happening to me when everything started to fall into place in my life?

I just thought that things would turn around for her.

I knew she had her struggles. Deep down, I just thought she would beat this.

“I’m so sorry, Ms. Taylor. The key here is to stay positive. If there are any more updates, we will certainly call you. I think you should try to go home and get some rest,” he said before he got up and left the room.

I went back in with Chante and let her know what was going on.

We decided to leave, and now I had the big task of letting Trina know what was going on.

I couldn’t tell her all this over the phone.

There was no telling how she would act. I called her phone a few times, and she didn’t answer.

First, we went to her best friend’s house to check for her, and she wasn’t there.

She was never home, so it never occurred to me to check there first. Plus, if my mom had been bingeing, it was no telling what kind of state the house was in.

But when we didn’t see her there, we decided to check the house at least before giving up our search and returning to the hospital to get an update.

“Now, what the fuck is his car doing here?” Chante said, when we saw the gray Chrysler 300 in the driveway of my mother’s house.

I couldn’t take any more today, so I hoped this nigga wasn’t over here in hopes of seeing me.

It was Saturday, so he was familiar with my routine.

Maybe he was waiting for me, but he knew things were over, so why would he be here?

Why else would he be here? Because…. No way.

I shook the thought from my head as soon as I had it.

I didn’t have time to think about it all.

All I knew was that Trina needed to understand what was going on with our mother.

We both hopped out, and I unlocked the door. I looked around, and the house seemed relatively clean, but there was Jay’s jacket on the side of the couch.

“Oh, hell nah, Dyami,” Chante said as we heard sex sounds coming from the back of the house.

I felt like I could burst into flames right then and there.

Without thinking, I grabbed a knife from the kitchen drawer and ran to the back of the house.

I got to Trina's room, and there she was spread out, and Jay was on top of her, humping like it was no damn tomorrow.

I was sick to my damn stomach. What kind of low-down, nasty piece of shit was this nigga to be fucking on my sixteen-year-old sister?

“What the fuck?” Chante screamed over my shoulder, causing them both to jump.

“YOU NASTY MUTHAFUCKA!” My blood had boiled over, and I gripped the knife firmly in my hand.

“Get out, Dyami! I’m grown, and this is my business! It ain’t my fault you can’t keep your man together,” she said, trying to sound like she was grown, but instead sounding so fucking stupid.

“Girl, hush yo’ fuckin’ mouth!” Chante shouted.

“The only reason why this nigga fuckin’ on you is because he can’t handle a real woman his age that could see through his fucking games. GET THE FUCK OUT, JAY!” I screamed.

“You didn’t invite me in. As a matter of fact, you don’t even live here. She is grown, and I waited until the age of consent to touch her, and guess what? This pussy is fucking delicious!” He said, licking his lips.

That was it! That was the point where I lost it. All the fucking betrayal that this man imparted in my life rose to the surface. I lunged at him, and I pushed the knife into his chest as deep as it would go.

“NOOOOO!” Trina said, grabbing at his chest while blood started to pour.

“Get the fuck back, Trina!” I said, tossing her off the side of the bed and pulling the knife back out of his chest, ready to stab again.

“No Dyami chill!!! He’s not worth it. What are you doing???” Chante said, grabbing me by the waist, and I tore away from her, too.

“I’M ABOUT TO KILL HIS ASS!” I said, meaning every word, and went back after him.