Page 16 of Always Been You

Crystal

I was at Somerset with my girls, and we were shopping. I only stayed around the prettiest and baddest chicks, and my two girls met the quota fully. When it came to who I placed myself around, that was the most significant requirement. Loyalty was a lost art, so I never trusted a damn soul.

When we stalked through swiping cards and toting bags, no one looked at us like we didn’t belong.

I was making some vlogs for my IG channel, which was really starting to pick up steam.

They were great for content too, and lately growing my following had become of the utmost importance.

Terror was tightening his grip on his money.

He was giving me enough to take care of MJ and wasn’t into spending much time with me.

I was trying to figure out how to handle that and get back in his good graces.

He’d never frozen me out for this long. I never thought my homegirl would do something stupid like fuck in my house, but damn, he was acting like he caught me sucking another nigga’s dick or something.

Terror was the man around here. When he spoke, niggas listened, and once Brick died, his stock skyrocketed.

I couldn’t have bitches knowing we weren’t together.

They would try to move in on him so damn fast my head would spin.

Clearly, some had already tried. Maybe even a few had fucked him, but I knew Terror was not getting involved too deeply with anyone.

For years, I tried to get a commitment, but I never could.

He was leaving money on the table because we could have been a power couple.

With his focus on the restaurant, I could have handled the drugs for him.

Terror never allowed me into that side of his business, but I know he would need a hand with that.

One thing I learned about him was that he was a man who could become fixated on a single goal.

It helped and it hurt, but I could be there to fill in the gaps.

It would benefit me because I could secure my position or at least my finances.

I’d heard rumors that a few drops and products were late.

It was so many niggas in the city who wanted to lay with me, and they stayed calling whenever the smallest thing was off.

I took the info, but I never fucked with them.

Once you fuck with a boss, you can’t go down to fucking with a worker.

I kept shit tight and cute for him since I touched down in Flint.

Even though I know he couldn’t say the same.

Terror was no longer interested in maintaining the illusion, and that scared me.

MJ and I were always safe because he kept a close eye on us.

A detail my girls were well aware of. It gave me a sense of power to be seen as the queen bee to my friends, but I yearned for my man to return. The piece of him that I was used to.

“So, what are you wearing to the opening? I know it’s your boo's birthday, right?” Shantel said, trying to sound casual.

This hoe was stalking too because I never told her a damn thing about Terror’s birthday.

She was hired at the bar for the restaurant, and that was the only reason I befriended her ass. I wanted eyes on everything.

“And how do you know that?” I asked.

“Girl, don’t be like that. We were talking about it at work while we were getting the bar ready for the opening.”

“Oh, okay. Yeah, it’s his birthday. I’m just going to attend the opening with him, and you know we will finish however he wants. I don’t know our color scheme yet.” I said, throwing her a wink. This bitch didn’t have to know anything about what was going on between us.

“See, girl, I don’t know how you do it! These bitches are ruthless and throwing themselves at him. But you know you my girl, and I’m gone let you know whenever I see shit.” Shantel responded.

“Right! I walked into a store, and when I came back outside to Pharaoh’s car, I heard a bitch tell him she would suck his dick right at the gas pump.

Who the hell does that? It was never like this where I grew up.

” Tanisa chimed in as she walked beside us.

She was positioned for a reason as well.

She had fucked off with Chubby a few times.

Her man, Pharaoh, was one of Terror’s top sellers as well.

“If you want a boss, you just got to deal with the peasants,” I smiled as we stopped in front of the Michael Kors store.

“All the time, though? Like, do these hoes take a break? I’m scared to eat carbs because the way these bitches treat landing a baller like an Olympic sport, I must stay ready at all times.” Tanisa pouted.

“This is just what comes along with the life,” I said more to myself than her.

“Well, damn, we can’t all make it look good like you,” Shantel said through a laugh. I detected some shade.

“Right!” Tanisa said genuinely.

“Take notes, then.” I shot back and walked inside the store to finish shopping.

We went through a few more stores. They kept their bags cute and small, while I rode home with more than my trunk could hold.

I picked up a badass dress that I knew Terror would not approve of.

It showed off every bit of sexiness that I possessed.

I was sure to turn a few heads and make him jealous.

That was one thing about him when we were messing around heavily.

He did not like me showing these other niggas what he was getting.

He was possessive, not in an overboard way, but in a way that let you know he wanted what was for him to only be for him.

I didn’t love Terror. Honestly, I loved no one but MJ, but Terror was my meal ticket.

He was good to me. He never put his hands on me, so anything else I could deal with.

I laid out my dress and started thinking about how I could finagle an invitation to show up with him, instead of separately.

Everyone would know something was off if that happened.

My phone buzzed in my bag, and I quickly reached for it, unlocking the screen.

I saw I had a text message, and when I read it, I froze.

Three simple words: How is he? I felt like I was about to shit a brick.

It was always a different number, but that didn’t matter; it was only one person who texted me like that.

I didn’t make many, but this one mistake was always threatening to come back and bite me in the ass.

Why would he be pulling this shit now, and what did he want?

The phone rang in my hand. I was so damn shook, I dropped it onto the floor.

No way this man was calling me. It stopped ringing, and it rang again.

Slowly, I fell to the ground to pick it up.

When I saw Shantel’s name on the screen, I let out a sigh of relief.

“Hey girl,” I said, fighting to keep my voice even. Fuck I needed to calm down. No, what I really needed was a strong fucking drink!

“Why the hell is your man in here with some chick on his arm? I’m outside Hurley, and your nigga is kissing all over this girl. It looks like they having lunch together.” She whispered.

I couldn’t even think about what she was saying. I was already in my liquor cabinet. I was going to pour myself a glass of henny, but instead I turned the whole bottle up.

“Did you hear me? Terror in here with some chick, and they playing real nice. You know I had to call you and put you up on this shit. I ain’t about to let this nigga play in yo face like this,” she was talking fast.

“I’m not worried about what he's doing with that bitch. She ain’t nothing but a plaything to him. He knows where he lays his head every night. Don’t worry, I will be shutting that shit down promptly. Remember what I told you less than an hour ago.” I said, trying to regulate my breathing.

“You better, and if you do, I’m going to have a front row seat. Girl, you're better than me because, whew!” She was still talking, but I disconnected the call mid-conversation.

Right now, what Terror was doing was the least of my worries. Shit, I needed to calm down. I looked at my phone and read the second message.

I asked you a question.

I replied and put my phone down. I knew that at some point this shit would catch up to me.

It had just been so long since he had reached out.

I just pushed it to the back of my mind.

I knew I was wrong on so many levels, but I had a life to maintain, and I can honestly say I didn’t know what the hell I was getting myself into at the time.

All I could do was pray like hell this secret didn’t come out.