Page 83 of Should Our Stars Collide

He holds his breath, unsure what answer he wants to hear.

“To you in particular, or in general?”

“Is there a difference?”

“Well, me and future you have rules for this. But yes, I’ve done it multiple times.”

Kieran licks his lips. He can’t really imagine a scenario where he would want someone manipulating his thoughts. “And to me?”

Ash squirms.Squirms.Kieran didn’t know he was physically capable of that. “Yes.”

Kieran exhales shakily. That’s… Fuck, he’s actually relieved.

But there’s something under the relief too. He can’t put a name to it, but it feels not all that great. Kinda like disappointment, which doesn’t make sense.

“So all this time, all those weird thoughts I’ve been having whenever you touch me. All those dreams; that’s your doing?”

Ash blinks. A slow, very dangerous smile nearly splits his face inhalf. “I don’t believe it is.”

“You just said?—”

“I said I’ve done it, which is true. But I’ve only done it once.”

“W-what?”

“When we were on the plane and you got all anxious. I slipped you a thought that wasn’t yours.”

There was so much going through his head while plummeting through the sky in a metal tube, it’s hard to pinpoint?—

Oh no. It’s coming back to him now. The image of himself being fucked into the mattress that popped out of nowhere and left him flustered and embarrassed.

“You fucker,” Kieran growls, gripping the sheets so he doesn’t claw Ash’s eyes out.

“I might’ve overstepped.”

“No shit!”

“But that was the only time,” Ash defends. “Whatever you’ve been feeling this whole time, that’s all you.”

“I don’t believe you.” Hecan’tbelieve him. “What about Fiji? When you grabbed me. And all those times we bumped into each other before. At the bar and the pub.”

Ash is visibly struggling not to laugh. “All you.”

“No.” Kieran shakes his head. “You’re lying.”

“Why would I lie about that but admit to the plane one?”

“To make yourself sound more trustworthy. It would be more sus if you claimed to never have messed with my head when you have the ability.”

“…You have a point,” Ash admits. “Well, I don’t know how else to prove it to you, but that really was the only time.”

It can’t be true. Itcan’tbe. Because that would mean…

“Is it really that unfathomable that you could have feelings for me?” Ash asks, voice quiet and…hurt.

Kieran opens his mouth to say something snappy, but nothing comes out, despite having a whole arsenal of reasons.

“What would be so bad about falling for me, Kieran?” Ash pressesas the silence goes on.