Page 60 of Should Our Stars Collide

If he was hoping for some useful guidance when the next video lands in his inbox, he’s in for a disappointment. He wanted help navigating this whole future business. Instead, he gets honest-to-god love advice.

“Hey, it’s you again. I hope I timed this right and you’ve eaten already. We’re always more agreeable on a full stomach.”

Never in his life has he wanted to punch himself in the face more.

“Hilarious.”

“So, this morning was a bust. And believe me, I get it. I get why you freaked out so much. And I know it’s hard to believe the things I say.”

“You’re right about that.” To be completely honest, he’s still not a hundred percent sure that this whole thing isn’t just a byproduct of his imagination. What if Ash never showed up at the pub? What if Kieran left there drunk as a skunk and managed to get hit by a car? What if he’s comatose and this is what his slowly deteriorating brain is coming up with?

No, that can’t be. Deteriorating brain or not, he would never ever dream up something as fucked up as this. He’s notthatcreative.

“But I need to say this: Ash is not perfect. He’s far, far from it. Sometimes he fucks up. Sometimes he fucks upbigtime.”

Look at that! Finally something they can agree on.

“But one thing I can promise you is that he would never knowingly hurt you. This whole situation is just as big of a shock to him as it is to you.”

“Doubt it.” Kieran shifts in discomfort. Ash’s stricken face after Kieran threw the margarita at him flashes in his mind. That wasn’t the face of someone who didn’t care. And then there was the food…

“Believe it or not, Ash is on your side. He’s your biggest cheerleader, so give him a chance, okay?”Kieran the Dick leans in, a mischievous, annoying smirk on his lips.“You already know what I’m talking about.”

Smug bastard. “Shut up,” Kieran mutters, half-heartedly. He’s far too emotionally drained to muster any real anger.

“By the way, take it easy on the drinking. We both know it’s just a way to run away from things.”

Good god, don’t tell him Ash’s therapist bullshit has rubbed off on him too!

“And let me tell you, you’re not gonna run away from this. You’re not gonna fuck this up for me and ruin the best thing that ever happened to me. To us.”

Kieran flinches, a snarky retort dying on his lips. Is he… Is this what he looks like when he feels really strongly about something? When he really, truly cares?

There’s a roughness to him, a kind of urgency that catches him off guard. It doesn’t sound like the version of him he’s used to—snarky, indifferent, quick to anger. The one that would rather burn in hell than show a single sign of vulnerability. Instead, there’s determination and unfiltered need, and, behind all that, raw fear.

He didn’t know he could look like that. Sound like that.

In the video, Kieran takes a shaky breath, as if realizing how much emotion he let slip out. When he continues, it sounds significantly more composed.

“For once in your life, be fucking brave, Kieran. I promise you that what’s on the other side is worth all the pain you might be facing. But youwon’t face it alone.”

Kieran swallows, telling himself that the lump in his throat will go away once he drinks some water. “Yeah, whatever.”

“Be brave, Kieran. Your whole future is on the line here.”

“Stop stressing me out, for fuck’s sake!” he whines. It’s too late. The video has ended, just as abruptly as last time. Not that talking to a recording would make much difference.

Well, that was much ado about nothing. According to his future self, he’s supposed to suck it up and trust the process. Stay open-minded, or some shit like that.

“Thanks a lot,” he grunts, letting his phone get lost amongst the mess of sheets and pillows.

He slides under the covers again. Maybe, if he closes his eyes and manages to fall asleep, he’ll wake up in his bed, in his apartment, on the Gold Coast. This will all be over. No more time-travel crap. No more useless advice from his stupid self.

No Ash.

He squirms, feeling strangely antsy.

The paper bag rustles somewhere to his right. Even empty, it probably still smells like a burger.