Page 160 of Should Our Stars Collide

Ash’s lips twitch with a brief smirk before he turns all serious again.

“I pride myself on being very good at reading people. To the point where I can pinpoint exactly what they want. And in some cases, I’m able to give it to them.”

So he’s basically admitting he uses his ability to find out people’s kinks and act on them.

He really is a pervert.

“I thought that was the case with you,” Ash goes on. “I thought that if I cracked through that armor of yours and gave you a night you’d never forget, it would heal the part of you that you so desperately keep hidden.”

Kieran must be losing his mind because it sounds almost…romantic.

It would be more romantic if Ash didn’t do it with randos he meets at bars, though.

“Healing through banging, huh?”

Ash gives a short laugh. “More than just banging, but sure, let’s go with that.” The way he looks at Kieran, full of longing and regret, would make an outsider thinkheis the one who got blown off, not the other way around. “I knew you wanted to be appreciated and adored, and that you wanted to let go of everything, for at least a moment. And I was more than willing to do that for you.”

Tears prick at Kieran’s eyes. This is exactly what those few weeks in the future were all about, yet Ash talks like it’s impossible.

“I still want those things. So what changed for you?”

“It’s notallyou want,” Ash corrects him, like the distinction is of utmost importance. “You don’t want this for one night, or two, or even ten. You want this for the rest of your life. Youneedthis for the rest of your life.”

Kieran throws his hands up as if to say: Your point?

A muscle in Ash’s jaw jumps. “I’m not a ‘rest-of-your-life’ type of guy.”

Kieran wants to laugh, wants to demand how Ash came to such a stupid, untrue conclusion. But this isn’t the first time he’s heard him talk like that.

“You’d think that with my ability, I’d be able to give anyone whatever they want. I’d automatically know what it is that they want. It took me a while to realize that it was no use. Because what they wanted wasn’t me. Or rather, what I had to offer wasn’t what they were after. No superpower in the world could change that.”

“I never had anything that was truly mine. Not until you came along.”

So that’s what this was about. And Kieran was the one who changed things.

He’ll just need to change them again. Rewrite the narrative until Ash gets his head out of his ass.

“That’s not true,” he informs him.

He doesn’t miss the spark of reluctant hope flashing in Ash’s eyes. “Kieran?—”

“It’s not. From where I’m standing, you lookexactlylike that type of guy.”

“The longest relationship I’ve had lasted four months. Believe me when I say I’m not suited for the long run.”

The labels spill from his lips with such ease, it makes Kieran wonder how long he’s been clinging to them.

“You’ve never been in a relationship with me, though. I’ll treat you real nice.” He scrunches his nose. “Okay, that’s a lie. I’m annoying and needy and I’ll insult you on a daily basis, but I have some positive traits too.”

Finally, a genuine smile curves Ash’s mouth.

“Kieran, you’re wonderful. You’re smart, and funny. A loyal friend.”

He smiles wider at seeing Kieran blush, and reaches out to tuck a strand of hair behind his ear. Kieran clings to the brief contact like a lifeline.

“You’re a little firecracker who can set the coldest heart on fire,and one day you’ll meet someone who will get to appreciate all those things about you for the rest of your lives.” Before Kieran can tell him he’s already met that person, Ash pulls his hand back and says, with heart-stopping finality, “But it's not going to be me. I’m sorry.”

He starts to walk away. Before Kieran can succumb to panic, he’s reminded of one more trait he possesses. One Ash omitted to mention.