Page 117 of Should Our Stars Collide

He doesn’t have to worry about Ash leaving over his fuck up.

He doesn’t have to keep punishing himself forever.

Ash will do it for him. He repeatedly mentioned that actions have consequences. He’ll hold Kieran accountable, but only for as long as is necessary. Once Kieran takes responsibility, all is going to be forgiven. Right? That’s how this works.

Please let it be how it works.

Mind made up, he shakes his head again. He doesn’t need to use his safeword because he’s already safe.

Next to him, Ash releases a shaky breath. His hand leaves Kieran’s neck, but before Kieran can panic about what that means, Ash slidesit lower to rest on his back. A calming presence as if to say: I’m here, and it’s all gonna be okay.

“In that case, bend over, now. Then pull your shorts down.”

Heat shoots up to Kieran’s face, all confidence suddenly gone. Fuck, this is humiliating.

Yeah, well, that’s what you get for being a brat,an Ash-like voice in his head retorts.

With one deep breath, Kieran bends at the waist. The island is cool against his skin, the temperature shock making him hiss.

“The shorts, Kieran.”

Squeezing his eyes shut, Kieran hooks his thumbs behind the waistband and tugs, hard and fast. They hit the floor with a soft thud, but to his ears the sound is deafening. Fuck, he’ll die of embarrassment.

Something soft touches his hips, making him jerk in surprise.

“Good boy,” Ash says, low and pleased. The words, as well as the pride in them, stir something in Kieran’s belly.

He relaxes, melting against the island when Ash strokes his hips in small, gentle circles. The tenderness is such a direct contradiction to what’s about to happen that Kieran’s head spins.

“I-is it gonna hurt?”

“Yes.”

Kieran buries his face in his folded arms. “How much?”

The hands on his hips cease stroking. They grip, hard enough to sting, and make him inhale sharply.

“As much as it hurts me when you say bad things about yourself.”

Welp. He’s fucked.

Then Ash is gone. Well, his hands are, but Kieran can feel his burning presence close by.

“One word, Kieran,” is all he says.

Kieran gets approximately two seconds before Ash’s palm connects with his right butt cheek. Hard.

The sharp sting propels him forward, the edge of the island digging into his hipbones.

Fucking hell, Ash is not easing him into it.

“Anything you want to say?”

About a million things, just not the one Ash is on alert for.

He shakes his head again. A split second later, his left cheek is on fire.

“Ow.”