Page 43 of Catch Me (Becoming Us #4)

Travis

I never needed an alarm because Tessa was religious about waking me up by six in the morning. She was capable of holding her bladder, but once her energy was replenished, she wanted to start her day. I’d gotten used to it, and as long as I had a pot of coffee, I survived.

When my eyes opened, it seemed too light in the room. Since it was winter, the sun shouldn’t have been this high.

I grabbed my phone from the nightstand, then sat up.

It wasn’t late, but she should have woken me by now.

When I looked beside me, I realized that Roman wasn’t in the bed.

Most likely, he hadn’t slept well and went into the kitchen or outside.

She loved him, so she’d follow. It was nice to sleep an extra couple of hours, but I would’ve rather been up with him, especially since he was leaving today.

After pulling on a pair of sweats, I yawned and headed for the door. Quickly, I peeked into his room and found it empty. He must’ve already put his things in the car.

I found Tessa in front of the fireplace with her head on her paws. She wagged her tail when she saw me, then leapt to her feet .

“Hey, monster. Today, of all days, you didn’t wake me up.”

She whined and sat down, offering me her paw. I took it and kissed the top of it before I went into the kitchen. There was no coffee made, so I started a pot, then scanned the space with my eyes.

Roman’s tablet had been on the island last night. Unsurprisingly, it was gone. If he was up and didn’t have any other responsibilities for the day, he’d be drawing. It was endearing, and there had been a few times that I’d watched him out on the deck when he didn’t know I was there.

I poured myself a cup and blew on it as I walked toward the back door. My brow furrowed when I didn’t find him outside. I looked at the coffee pot again. The times when he woke up before me, there was always coffee made.

“Do you know where Roman is?” I asked Tessa.

She whined again. The coffee felt acidic in my stomach, and I had to set it down.

When I opened the front door, I told myself that he’d be on the patio, sitting on the stairs while he drew.

I rushed down the steps and stopped in the grass as I stared at the driveway.

My hands went to the top of my head and my eyes closed.

He wouldn’t.

I pulled out my phone and double-checked that he hadn’t texted me, but the only thing there was our last conversation.

Our last conversation. Those three words weren’t fathomable right now.

Trav: Hey

Where are you?

I waited ten minutes before I texted again.

Trav: Roman. Please tell me you didn’t

My fingers shook as I hit the call button. It rang until it reached his voicemail. The sound of his voice made my eyes sting. When it beeped, I took a shaky breath and started pacing.

“Roman...I don’t know what happened. Your stuff is gone and it’s only eight. We were supposed to go to breakfast. I don’t know why I’m telling you that. You already know. ”

Shit, I was rambling. It was impossible to organize my thoughts when I was like this.

“Look, if something happened, just tell me. You said that you would talk to me, but you left. You...just left after you made a promise to me. Doesn’t that mean something to you?” I paused, leaning my hand against the counter. “Did it ever mean something to you? Any of it?”

I was an idiot. He’d been here for three weeks, and we hadn’t interacted much before that. Being in such close proximity obviously affected me and made me get used to his presence. I started liking him too quickly, and I’d thought he felt the same way, so I leaned into it.

But this was Roman. People didn’t change that easily, and I shouldn’t have given into my feelings like that.

Maybe he used me as relief or maybe he just rushed and freaked out.

I could deal with the former; it was shitty, but oh well.

The second one we could have dealt with too, but he didn’t give us the chance.

He wouldn’t answer me now, which made the reality of the situation settle uncomfortably.

If he talked to me, we’d figure it out, whether we cut it off or moved forward. But he left . I knew his plane didn’t leave until four in the morning, which meant he was ignoring me.

I would wait. I’d give him enough time to work some things out in his head. Even a text saying he needed time would suffice.

Even as I let myself feel a smidge of hope, I knew I had to put a boundary in my place. For my own good. I couldn’t wait forever. Seven days. If he couldn’t even manage a text in that time, I couldn’t do this. I would let it destroy me, so I had to let it go after that.

“A week, Roman. Take some time to think, but I need to hear something . I think that’s fair to both of us.

Just be safe, okay? Remember that spark, the one in the woods.

It has everything you need to find yourself.

” I walked over to the door and flipped the light switch up.

“I’ll leave the light on, ’kay? Until you come back. ”

I wanted to say more, but there was nothing else that was important. I didn’t want to talk to his voicemail. I wanted to talk to him.

*****

“Eggnog,” Dad announced as he came into the living room .

I took it with a smile and held the warm cup between my hands. This place looked exactly the same as it had six years ago when I left. It was the same as when my mom was alive. My dad wasn’t the type to change things, especially when it came to home décor.

“The tree looks nice,” I said.

He made an affirmative sound and moved over to it. “These are new lights. Supposedly, they won’t stop working if any of the bulbs break.”

“Supposedly. Maybe we should test it out.”

“Don’t go ruining my tree. Oh, this box.” He set his eggnog down and turned in a circle. I could see the gears turning as he ran his hands through his greying hair and tried to remember where he’d put it.

“That one?” I nodded toward an old box on the other side of the tree.

“Yes. Mom’s ornaments are in here and the ones you made every year. We have to put those up.”

We always did that together on Christmas Eve. I didn’t know why we’d started doing it, but waiting until today had become our ritual. Maybe it was too sad to have them up for weeks. On Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, she was with us, and that was enough.

“Let me finish this eggnog and we’ll do it,” I said.

He sat beside me and took a drink. “You okay, Trav?”

“Yeah, why?”

“You’re not as upbeat as usual. Is work stressing you out?”

“We haven’t had much to do. In January, we’ll probably have more interviews and all that boring stuff. I know they want me in a couple of commercials.”

“Wow, that’s incredible. You’ll have to tell me which ones so I can find them.”

“Probably stupid things like deodorant and socks.”

“At least you’ll get paid for it.”

“I don’t need any more money.”

When he frowned, I looked away. My fingers twitched as I tried to fight the urge to look at my phone. After a minute, I gave in, only to find the same as the last three days. Nothing. I’d even texted him a few more times.

“I’ll be right back,” I said, getting to my feet .

It was stupid and maybe it crossed a line, but I had to know something or I would lose my mind.

Trav: Hey. Is Roman there for the holiday?

Tilian: Unfortunately. Why?

Trav: Why unfortunately? He mentioned that you guys were okay now

Tilian: LOL. We had a moment. Moment over. He’s being an ass and tried to start shit with Brooks. Good thing he doesn’t fight, but if Roman keeps pushing him, Brooks might have him assassinated

Trav: Ok, well thanks

Tilian: Why are u asking about Roman?

Trav: Just had a question about the project we worked on together. No worries

Tilian: I can tell him to call u

Trav: No. It’s not important

Tilian: Ok. Have a good Xmas

Well, he was alive. That was something. Alive and being an asshole, which couldn’t be a good sign, but he clearly didn’t want to talk to me.

Four days. There were still four days, but at this point, I didn’t have much hope. I was becoming bitter about it, and if he did talk to me before Monday, he’d need to explain what the hell was going on.

I unclenched my fist when Tessa came up to me, tail wagging as if she didn’t have a care in the world. Not too long ago, I’d feel about the same way.

“Hey, monster. You get one present tonight and the rest tomorrow. Let’s go pick one out.”