Page 42 of Catch Me (Becoming Us #4)

Roman

“Roman.”

“Hm?”

“Your phone.”

Rolling reluctantly away from Travis, I leaned over the bed to grab my jeans. The incessant buzzing was getting on my nerves already, but I didn’t find it until I reached into my last pocket. When I saw that my dad was calling me, I sighed and got out of bed.

I looked back at Travis, who was already knocked out again. He was clutching the blanket to his chest, and his face was smooshed against the pillow. He still looked hot like that, and I almost ignored the call, but I forced myself to head onto the back deck.

Bringing the phone to my ear, I blew out a breath. “Hey, Dad. It’s late.”

“Sorry. I forgot about the time zone.” The way he laughed made me wonder if he cared about that at all.

“It’s cool. I can always go back to sleep.”

“Alright. What’ve you been up to? ”

“Just the usual, really. Drawing and...Actually, I’m working on a project. A paid one.”

“Oh?” There was movement as if he was doing something while we talked.

“I’m making a bunch of pieces. About thirty. It’s a really big deal and a great opportunity.”

“That’s good, Rome. I’m glad you found someone who wants to pay for your art.”

Pacing across the deck, I held the phone tightly. “It’s for the Braves.”

“Atlanta? Shit, look at that.”

My lips twitched upward. “I’ve been working with the whole team. It’s really cool.”

“How’d you get involved in something like that?”

“Well, I met one of the players. Tra—”

“Got a connection that introduced you?”

I stared down at the wood in front of my feet. “Yeah. Tilian’s friends.”

He made a sound that I recognized. My heart sped up as dread chilled my blood. I knew what type of response was coming, but I still hoped I was wrong. At one time, I’d gone along with the shit he said and we’d laughed about it.

“Heard Ross’ kid moved in with a guy. Can’t believe your mom posted about it on social media like she was proud.”

“She is,” I said softly. “Til’s boyfriend is good for him.”

“Rome, don’t tell me she’s softened you toward that shit.”

“Mom just wants him to be happy, Dad. He’s her stepson.”

“Maybe she shouldn’t have married a guy who couldn’t set a good example for his kids.”

“Just shut the fuck up.”

The silence that ensued made the delayed panic start to crawl through me.

I shouldn’t have said that. What the fuck was I thinking?

Not sure what else to do, I waited for him to respond. While the seconds dragged on, I put the phone on speaker and checked my notifications. A text there made me pause.

Ezra: Hey, how’s your break going?

Roman: Break’s been amazing. I hope yours has to o

Ezra: Yeah, it’s nice being home. I’ve been drawing a lot

Roman: I’d love to see them when I get back

My stomach felt like shit right now.

Since I was trying to make little changes, I thought this was a good one to work on.

I did want to see his drawings, and when I thought about it, there was no confliction like every time before.

Maybe it was because I knew that it wasn’t about sex.

I had no idea what I’d be going home to after break, considering I couldn’t imagine hanging out with my old group.

I wasn’t going to jump off the deep end and make a bunch of new friends, but it’d be nice to have someone around who didn’t make me feel like I was tearing off my skin to mold myself into someone else.

If Travis wouldn’t mind me hanging out with Ezra, at least. Considering our history, he might find it weird.

“Guess we can agree to disagree,” Dad said dismissively.

After a deep breath, I shook my head. “Are we not allowed to have a difference of opinion?”

“Sure, but the fact that you see this as an opinion is disappointing.”

The statement made my nostrils flare. Why did I even care? He wasn’t someone I wanted to be like, but the idea of cutting ties made me feel weak right down to my bones.

“Okay,” I replied simply.

Ezra: Really?

Roman: Yeah, but not like that...You’re an amazing person and I’m being honest when I say I hope you find a guy who can give you what you deserve. Sorry I was always a dick

Ezra: Oh ok. I understand how things are for you, so no need to apologize. If you want to actually hang out for real, not like before, I want to do that too. You’re a cool guy, Roman. It doesn’t have to be more

I let out a relieved breath. He was a good person, which was part of why I’d liked him.

After building this friendship with Travis, I wanted to explore platonic relationships I could actually enjoy.

It didn’t matter that Ezra was gay, and maybe I’d get shit for being his friend, but hopefully, I’d find a way to get past what other people said about it .

“Is that all you called for?” I asked. “To check in.”

“Melissa and the kids were upset you couldn’t come for the holiday.” His voice was more curt than before, and at this point, I just didn’t have the mental energy to deal with it.

“Tell them I’m sorry. I’ve got to go. It’s late and I’m heading to the airport tomorrow.”

Without waiting for him to respond, I ended the call. My phone buzzed, so I pulled down the notification bar to send a quick response.

Roman: Our history makes things kind of weird, but I always enjoyed hanging out with you. It wasn’t just the physical stuff, so yeah. I want to stay friends if you do. See you when break is over, Ezra

As I crawled back into bed, my brain wouldn’t let go of my dad’s words. I suddenly understood what Sen had said about his parents, the way he struggled with the idea of being a failure in their eyes.

I wasn’t ready for that—not in the slightest.

Travis’ arm came around me from behind and made my breath stutter.

Fuck, I was losing it. My head was full of worst-case scenarios, all converging into one giant train wreck.

So many things could go wrong. So many things. So many fucking things.

I was supposed to talk to Travis if I freaked out. Waking him up to tell him that my dad was disappointed in me was stupid. If I could rein in my emotions enough to fall asleep, I’d bring it up tomorrow.

Maybe he’d go back to his decision in the woods and walk away because he didn’t know what to do with me. When it actually got hard, would we figure out how to navigate whatever was thrown at us or would one of us drown?

Hell, maybe we’d both drown. I’d drag him down with me.

He’d clawed his way out of his own hell and built something for himself.

He was comfortable and happy. All I was doing was making him risk all of that.

For what? A guy who’d been an asshole to him a bunch of times, made him feel wrong for being gay, and was more trouble than I was worth ?

No. We could figure it out. I just had to calm down so that I could think clearly. The issue with my dad could wait, and if Travis could be patient with me...

My phone was still in my hand, so when it vibrated, I turned on the screen to look at the message. More than one.

Oh, God.

This was when I needed to wake him up.