Page 48 of It’s Only Love

Dennis

“If you’re going to be on your feet for prolonged periods, please use your crutches. And keep the compression sock wrapped around your ankle during the day, but don’t sleep with it on so your skin can breathe,” Sally, the nurse who’s been taking care of me since last night, says.

“Yes, ma’am.”

She rolls her deep brown eyes and smiles crookedly as she tucks her long, black bangs behind her ear. “Please, hun, I’m not that old. Barely forty yet. Don’t ever call me ma’am again.”

I give her a salute. “Aye, aye, Captain.”

“Dennis, you’re trouble with a capital T.”

“But a fun kind of trouble, right?” I wink.

Sally shakes her head, then inspects the doctor’s prescription on a clipboard. She pulls a pen from her pink scrubs, which look so pretty against her dusky skin, then writes something down.

“Your scrubs are making me hungry,” I grin. “They look like cotton candy. ”

She huffs. “ Anyway … here are your painkillers if you need them. Your concussion is mild, so just make sure not to do anything overly strenuous. Keep your leg elevated while sleeping and ice it as needed.”

I take the pill bottle from her and set it on the side table in my hospital room. I’m not feeling too bad, other than a slight headache that’s manageable.

Honestly, I’m fucking relieved I walked away from that accident. My car really did protect me from the worst of it, but I hate that I now need a new one. I’ve only had it for a few months—barely that.

Sally leaves to get me discharged, and I stand, hopping on one foot to get dressed in the clothes Mom brought me.

I strip out of the annoying hospital gown that covers nothing, and tug on my basketball shorts over my underwear.

Then I pull the red T-shirt over my head.

My parents should be here soon to pick me up, and I want to be ready.

As I sit back down to wait, I stare out the window; the hospital is surrounded by thick trees.

It’s raining out, but I’ve always loved the rain.

I try not to think about Mike. When Dad told me Mike had shown up at the hospital but had run out of here, looking panicked, it confused the hell out of me.

It was hard not to be a little hurt because I really needed him.

That accident was pretty scary, even though I came away relatively unscathed.

But if Mike panicked and ran out of here, he must’ve had a reason for it.

He isn’t prone to overreacting. He’s the steadiest person I know.

So, I try to be understanding. But the worry lingers in the back of my mind like an itch I can’t reach.

Mike wasn’t himself before I left for that job interview, and then he ran out of the hospital…

Yeah, there’s definitely something wrong.

The reason is pretty obvious, at least to me. His dad was killed in a car accident, and my accident probably triggered him. I ran it through my head for hours, and it’s the only thing that makes sense to me. He wouldn’t have shown up here in the first place if he hadn’t intended to see me.

Because of that, and now having a healthy dose of fear of driving, I’m having second thoughts about this job I just interviewed for.

If I have to travel so much, I know it’s going to stress Mike out, and it’ll already be hard enough with me being away during the week for the next few months. God, I have a lot to think about.

Once I get home, I’ll have my mom drive me to Mike’s place to check on him. Then we should probably talk.

There’s a knock on my door behind me, and I turn around, expecting my parents.

Instead, it’s the most beautiful person I know standing there.

My stomach dips at the sight of Mike, and my heart aches when I notice his swollen eyes.

Eyes that look like he’s been crying. Eyes that are filled with grief, pain, and guilt, I think.

He stands there with his hands shoved into the pockets of his jeans, unmoving.

He looks so lost, just like he did after his dad died, like he’s carrying too much weight for his shoulders to bear.

It only confirms my suspicion that my accident triggered his trauma.

God, my poor Mike.

I twist my body on the bed so I’m facing him, and I reach out my hand.

Instant relief washes over his face. He rushes over to me, sits on the bed, and gathers me in his arms. I rest my head on his shoulder and hold him back.

We sit there in silence for who knows how long, just feeling each other breathe.

“I just need to hold you for a bit,” he whispers. “I just need to make sure you’re… real and okay.”

My fingers dig into his strong back, and I hold him tighter. “I’m okay, babe. I swear I’m fine. I’m just so fucking happy you’re here.”

His body tenses, but he doesn’t let me go. “I… tried, Den.”

“It’s okay. It’s fine. You’re here now. That’s all that matters. ”

Mike lets go and grabs my shoulders, easing me off him. His eyes are red-rimmed and wet. The pain just oozes off him, and I ache for him. I rest my hand on his cheek and lean forward to give him a brief kiss.

“I, ah, told your parents I’d take you home. They’ve already checked you out, so you can leave whenever you’re ready. But… I want to take you somewhere. I want to show you something. I mean, if you’re up for it.”

“Sure, okay.”

Mike helps me to stand and grabs my crutches, handing them to me. Then he eyes me worriedly. “Maybe I should take you home instead.”

I tuck each crutch under my arms to take the pressure off my ankle. “I’m fine, Mike. Really. Show me.”

He nods and gathers my things, including my meds, throwing them all into my gym bag. He tosses the bag over his shoulder and presses a hand to my back as I lead the way out.

“Stop!” Sally suddenly yells, rushing toward me down the hall with a wheelchair, her long black curls billowing behind her. “Trouble, I tell ya! Do not think you can sneak out of here on crutches. You trying to get me fired?”

Mike chuckles behind me as I give her my biggest and brightest smile. “I would never…”

She shakes her head, but she can’t help but smile back. “In the chair, Trouble.”

I hand the crutches to Mike and ease myself down into the wheelchair. She spins me around and wheels me out of the hospital. “Make sure this troublemaker follows the rules and protects that head and ankle of his,” she says to Mike.

“Yes, ma’am. ”

“God, not you, too.”

“Oops, Mike’s on Nurse Sally’s shit list,” I say, laughing.

Now she’s laughing too, her straight teeth pearly white against her flawless brown skin. “I’d pop you on the head for that, but I’m a kind and gentle soul.”

“ Sure you are…”

I dig in the pocket of my shorts and pull out a Fireball, unwrap it, and pop it into my mouth as I’m pushed outside. We stand under cover as Mike rushes out into the rain to retrieve his truck.

“Don’t give that boyfriend of yours a hard time,” she admonishes me.

“I’m a saint.”

She scoffs. “ Sure you are,” she says, using my words against me.

Once Mike pulls his truck up, he and Sally help me get into the passenger seat, as if I were an invalid or something. Ridiculous. But if it makes them feel better.

“Bye, Sally… ma’am . Thanks for taking such good care of me.”

“I can’t tell if you’re being serious or not.”

Mike closes the door as she waves me off. I buckle up, and Mike climbs in, doing the same. Suddenly, the air is heavy with seriousness and tension again. I don’t know where he’s taking me, but afterward, there needs to be a talk between us. I can’t stand seeing him so stressed out. It hurts me.

We don’t go far as we drive through a neighborhood, not far from where I live. Mike pulls his truck over to the side, puts it in Park, and jumps out. Then he rushes to the other side with my crutches and helps me out.

“Be careful through here,” he says. “There’s a lot of plant growth and rocks.”

I get my crutches tucked under me. At least the rain has stopped, but the area is muddy. We walk through the area surrounded by trees, but the center of the plot is covered in plant life. Flanking either side are two homes, but they’re barely visible through the dense growth and trees.

Mike stands in the middle and spins around with his arms out. “Well, what do you think? It’s for sale. It’s about a half acre. Not much, but it’s about all I can afford.”

I look around and grin. “It’s beautiful here. Are you seriously going through with building your own house, then?”

He grins back, looking so much better than earlier.

I’ve wanted him to smile like that forever.

“Yep. I wanted something closer to the beach, but that shit is three times as much money. I need something affordable to build my house on, because that won’t be cheap either.

I’ve been saving every nickel and dime after Mom and I pay the bills.

I’ve managed to save a decent-sized nest egg along with my dad’s insurance money. I’ll finance the rest if I have to.”

“God, Mike. That’s fucking amazing. It’s going to be gorgeous; I just know it. You’re so good with your hands and building things.”

He steps up to me and rests his hands on my hips.

“When it’s done, I’d like you to live with me.

As in, I want it to be our home, where we build a life together.

” He looks at me expectantly, biting his bottom lip nervously.

But he doesn’t have to be nervous. There’s nothing I’d rather do than live with Mike and build a home and a life together.

It’s everything I’ve ever wanted, and that he wants it, too.

.. Fuck, I can’t describe how that feels.

“You don’t need to ask twice. I’d love that,” I blurt, but before I can jump him and kiss the hell out of him, he holds me back.

“Before we do anything, I… need to talk to you.”

I nod slowly. “Yeah, I figured.”

“I’m so sorry about last night. When I showed up, I was so fucked in the head.

The longer I was there, the worse it got.

At first, I couldn’t figure out why. You said you were okay, but it was like my mind couldn’t process it.

Still, I had this desperation to see you just to be sure, but instead, I fucking ran.

Eventually, all I could see was your death and… Dad’s.

“Oh, God, Mike…” I reach for his face, balancing on one leg. “That must’ve been terrifying. Honestly, I assumed that’s what happened when Dad said you’d left the hospital.”

He huffs a humorless laugh, his eyes pinned to mine.

“You’ve always seen and understood me, Den.

” He sighs, pulling me closer against him, mindful of my crutches.

“I was freaking out, terrified I’d lose you like I lost him.

Then I realized I really never grieved over my dad.

I just went through the motions of living and taking care of Mom.

Last night, I was brought back to my loss and Mom’s grief, and how visceral it was.

I just couldn’t fucking take it. If I lost you, I know it would fucking kill me.

You’re everything to me, Den. Everything ,” he croaks.

My eyes water along with his. “And you’re everything to me.”

“Who knows how long I cried. Then Mom and I had a long talk about everything. It really helped me process. I think we both needed it.”

“I know my accident scared you, and I’m so sorry for that, Mike.”

He shakes his head. “It just reminded me of how fleeting life can be. But I don’t want to live in this fear that I’ll lose you and give up on a chance to love you.

I’ll suffer the drives you’ll need to make for work.

We’ll figure this out, baby. No matter what you do or where you go, I’ll always be here. ”

I take a shuddering breath. God, this guy… I don’t think anyone truly knows how passionate Mike can be. He’s so understated in the world around him, but with me… he hides nothing. At least not anymore.

I lean my face forward and kiss his lips.

Soon, we’re making out like fools, his grip tight on me so I don’t fall and injure myself.

When we pull away, breathless, I say, “I need to figure out my job situation, but… I do n’t want to leave, Mike.

After my accident, I…” I sigh heavily. “I know I said I was okay, but it was fucking scary. Hell, I don’t even know when I’ll be able to get behind the wheel again.

I will, but it’s going to take some time.

One thing I know for sure is that I can’t take that job if they offer it to me.

I not only won’t be able to make that drive, but I don’t want to be away from you that long.

The job is perfect for me, but you and I, what we have, is more important. ”

He shakes his head. “Den, you can’t not work. We’ll figure this out.”

“I’ll work with Mom if I have to. She already said I could.

It is what it is. Life isn’t always easy or seamless.

I’ve learned a lot since college and everything that’s happened.

Life is full of snags and twisting vines, kind of like this plot of land,” I chuckle softly.

“But you can clear it away. Will it grow back? Sure. But with a little upkeep, it’ll be perfect.

I don’t care what I do as long as you’re in my life. ”

Mike pulls me against his solid chest and holds me in a tight embrace. “I’d never ask that of you. I’d never ask you to choose me over your career.”

“And that’s why I love you so much. You’re selfless and so giving. But you deserve attention and love, too. Someone needs to compromise for you sometimes. As you said, we’ll figure this out, okay?”

“Okay.” He lets me go, cups my face, and plants a kiss on my lips. “I love you. So much. I’m not going to look back and berate myself anymore about not realizing it sooner. As long as you’re mine now.”

“Always. And I love you… With everything that I am.”