Page 31 of It’s Only Love

Mike

The past few days have been kind of brutal.

It felt like floating on a pink cotton candy cloud after kissing Dennis, only to crash land in a cactus face first. They fucking fired him.

I’m having a hard time believing it. Can’t they see how amazing he is?

How passionate he is about nature and about teaching the value of conservation and respect for the wild to kids?

Dennis falling to pieces in my arms while he cried over losing his job was tough, but it only made me more determined to prove to him he can count on me.

I know he felt like shutting me out, just like he did right after he came back home, but I’m having none of that.

I meant what I told him a few days ago in the bathroom when we kissed; I want him, and I want to give this thing building between us a real shot.

Now that I’ve admitted to myself and him how I feel, there’s no going back.

I can’t see myself with anyone else. I don’t want anyone else.

If that means putting my own needs aside and focusing solely on him right now, so be it.

That means that even though he might not be feeling it this very minute, I’m going ahead with planning our date.

I want it to be something that will bring back the light in those fucking beautiful eyes of his.

Something that will give him a reprieve from the harsh reality of losing his dream job.

So I’m going all in on the romance even though I don’t think I have one single romantic bone in my body.

After googling romantic first dates and perfect beach dates , I’m ready to throw my damn phone out the window.

All scenarios seem so… over the top somehow, and not like Dennis and me at all.

Willow is moping next to me, trying to message me with her snout against my thigh that she’s so over this. Yeah, you and me both, baby girl.

Eventually, I drop my phone on the comforter and get up from my bed, then run downstairs.

I find Mom in the kitchen, Bruce Springsteen’s I’m on Fire on full blast while she’s preparing dinner.

Hamburgers, I think. My stomach growls, and I realize I forgot all about food while trying to plan the perfect date for Dennis.

I stand next to her and sigh, snagging a piece of lettuce from the bowl.

Mom takes me in, a frown between her brows. “What’s up, buttercup?” I can’t help groaning, stuffing the piece of lettuce into my mouth.

“Buttercup?”

She laughs, then leans over from where she’s slicing tomatoes, and presses a quick kiss against my cheek.

Without saying a word, I grab another carving board from the cabinet and then pull a knife from the kitchen drawer.

I reach for the cucumber and start dicing it for the salad.

After a few minutes, I finally say, “Mom, can I ask you something?”

“Sure, sweetie.”

“What was the best date Dad ever took you on?”

She snorts as she shapes some of the meat into a burger.

Then she laughs. “Your Dad was good at many things, but arranging a date…” She shakes her head, a wistful frown tugging at her lips.

“Then again, it never re ally mattered. In the end, all that mattered was that we were together, just the two of us.”

I nod, the meaning of her words settling inside me. Together. Just the two of us. Of course. Dennis doesn’t need fancy or expensive; he just needs my undivided attention. And I can give him that.

I lean in against Mom, bumping my elbow affectionately against hers.

“Thanks, Mom.”

She smiles at me, then narrows her eyes slightly. “Why are you asking?”

“No reason,” I blurt. “Just wondering, that’s all.”

She huffs a laugh. “Are you going on a date, Michael?”

“Yeah,” I shrug, then quickly add, “I do date, you know?”

She smirks. “If that’s what you wanna call it.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’ve just never asked me for dating advice before. Must be someone really special.” She looks at me knowingly, and I almost blurt he is, then bite my tongue, and just nod instead.

She goes back to shaping the burgers, her fingers working with years of experience as Bruce sings in the background.

Eventually, she says, “Just be yourself, Michael.”

I manage to nod before she pulls the rug out from under my feet in real-Mom fashion. “That’s who he’s always wanted, you know. Just you.”

Well, fuck me .

Oranges and reds from the flickering fire dance across Dennis’ face, doing something to his brown eyes, making them sparkle as he looks at me.

“This is nice,” he says, his voice breathy. He trails his fingers through the sand, drawing random patterns, his arm brushing up against mine. There’s still an undertone of defeat in his voice, of sadness, but he looks way more relaxed now than when I picked him up half an hour ago.

“Yeah?” I reach for his hand, tangling our fingers together. “I kinda panicked at first, but then Mom told me to just be myself. That you’d like that.”

He sucks in a breath, looking at me wide-eyed. “You told her?” Surprise coats his voice, a blush spreading across his cheekbones.

“She guessed.” I smile, squeezing his hand, his skin so warm and soft, doing things to my heart that I can’t describe but that just feel so good. “I’ve never asked for her advice on a date before,” I admit, “so she kinda knew something was different.”

“And she knew it was me.” It isn’t a question, but more of a statement.

I nod. “Yeah, I guess she knew long before I did.”

He squeezes my hand back, his thumb tracing circles across my knuckles. “I think Wes and Aaron did, too.” Aaron. Shit. I never even thought about that. What will it mean to our friendship now that I’m dating Dennis? Because we are dating, aren’t we?

Dennis must read my worry because he chuckles, his voice low and warm. “Don’t worry. I think he’s okay with it. Told me we should just be good to each other.”

Good to each other.

I instantly relax and scoot closer to Dennis, releasing his hand to wrap my arm around his shoulder instead, pulling him against me .

“I can do that,” I murmur against his temple.

“Be good to you.” He looks up at me, his lips pressed into the cutest pout.

“I’ll do my very best to be that, Den. I can’t make the past go away or give you your job back, but I can promise you I’ll always try to treat you right.

” The ‘ better than that asshole did’ is left unsaid but implied.

He nods as the blush tinting his cheeks deepens into a warm pink.

“I know you will, Mike,” he sighs before he leans in, closing the gap between us.

“I struggle with trust, but with you I don’t.

I worried it would be a factor if I dated again, but I don’t feel that way with you.

” He presses the words against my lips, and the fire inside starts all over again; my chest, my gut, every limb suddenly aflame.

I open for him, and his tongue dives into my mouth, sweeping gently against mine at first, before hunger takes over, and he sucks on my tongue.

And just like that, I grow hard, my cock swelling in my jeans, a thousand sensations flowing through my body, the need for him unlike anything I’ve ever felt before.

Dennis moves against me, moaning into my mouth, and before I know it, he’s straddling me, sitting in my lap, his body flush against mine, his heart racing.

I can feel it. I can feel his need for me, too, his hardness pressing up against mine.

He’s so warm and smooth, yet hard in all the right places.

His muscular arms wrap around my neck, and his fingers dive into my hair, tugging at the strands while he does something with his hips.

It’s a rolling motion, like a wave of intense pleasure washing over me, the scent of him and the repetitive sound of the ocean in the background coming together.

He is an ocean, threatening to pull me under and sweep me away, and suddenly it’s all too much.

I’ve never felt this loss of control before, and it scares me beyond words.

“Dennis, Dennis, Dennis,” I chant, pushing him away from me carefully.

I don’t think he hears me as he chases my lips when I pull away.

“Stop.” I laugh against his lips, and he freezes in my arms like he’s been stung by a bee, pulling away from me immediately.

Uncertainty and regret flash through his eyes as his bottom lip quivers.

“Shit. I’m sorry, Mike. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—” He glances away, his eyes filled with shame.

I quickly catch his chin between my thumb and index finger and turn his face back toward me, but he still avoids eye contact.

“Hey,” I say. “Don’t do that. Please look at me, Den.”

Reluctantly, his gaze moves to mine, uncertainty still flaring in the golden brown. The flames from the fire flicker across his skin, and he is so beautiful that my heart almost cracks and bursts into a million pieces.

“I’m sorry,” he says again. “I’m moving too fast.” He digs his teeth into his bottom lip. “I just forget myself when I’m with you, but it’s too fast.”

“Never.” I lean in, murmuring against his lips.

“You’re fucking perfect, Den. I’m the one who’s been too fucking slow this whole time.

I just need some time to catch up. It’s just…

It’s overwhelming, you know? This intensity.

This need for you. To be with you. To feel you.

I’ve never experienced that before. I’ve never wanted anyone like this.

” It’s the first time I’ve ever spoken these words to anyone, but as I do, I realize the truth in them.

“I’ve wanted to so many times. To want someone in that way, but eventually, I just stopped trying, thinking it was just never gonna happen.

Then you came back, and now it has.” I’m usually not much of a talker, but now it’s like something has shifted inside me and I need to get it off my chest.