Page 12 of It’s Only Love

Dennis

Present Day

“Holy shit! I can’t believe we’re finally graduating!” Wes says, walking into my bedroom and handing me a shot glass of what looks like whiskey, as I’m getting ready for the graduation party going on at one of the fraternity houses. Hell, everyone’s partying tonight.

We clink glasses and toss back the fiery liquid, burning as it goes down.

I shudder. “Blech. Fucking lighter fluid.” I set my glass on the dresser and looked into the mirror to fix my tousled hair, trying to get it just right.

“And we’re celebrating something else, too,” I say, focusing on a rogue strand that keeps bugging me—stupid cowlick.

Wes winks at me. “You’re pregnant?”

I give him a deadpan look with an exaggerated eye roll.

“No, dumbass. I got the job as an environmental educator back home. It’s a nature day camp, and it pays pretty damn well, starting at fifty-five thousand a year.

It’s only temporary until I can get my feet wet and start creating my own organization. ”

I dip my finger into the small jar of fiber paste and rub my hands together to warm it up. I run my fingers through my hair, taming it so it doesn’t look like I just climbed out of bed.

Wesley’s eyes blow wide and his jaw drops. “Why didn’t you tell me, dude?”

“Surprise?”

He yanks me into a hug and pats my back, my arms spread out so I don’t get hair goop on him. “Congratulations, man.”

“Thanks! I can’t wait to tell Geoff. He’s going to be fucking excited.”

I haven’t told Mike yet either, keeping it a secret until I get back into town.

I’d been hoping to find work back home, so I wouldn’t have to leave him behind.

Is it weird that I’ve planned my life around Mike?

Maybe. He never felt the way I did, but he’s still special all the same.

But I miss Cannon Beach, too. It’s my home.

The West Coast will always call me back.

Wes leans against the wall as I wipe my hands on a towel, grab my short-sleeve button-up, and shrug it on. “How’s that going to work with you back in Cannon Beach and him going to law school in Portland?” he asks.

“We’ll figure it out. Lots of people long-distance date, right? I mean, it’s only an hour-and-a-half drive. He can finally come visit. He really needs to meet my parents and Aaron. They’ve been nagging me to invite him to stay for a long weekend.”

Wes and I have grown really strong in our friendship over the years.

The last two of which we’ve been roommates in a tiny apartment off campus.

Unfortunately, he’s only going back to Cannon Beach for the summer before returning to the University of Oregon, where he’ll work in physical therapy for the football team .

“What are you going to tell Mike about Geoff? He’s going to meet him eventually.”

I eye my friend and wince. “Yeah…”

He runs a hand through his thick blond hair and rolls his eyes at me with exasperation. “Den… you have to tell him.”

“I will . It’s just weird, you know? I’ve been crushing on Mike since I was fucking twelve. Sure, we aren’t together and never will be, but it’s like… I don’t know. It’s hard to explain.”

“Like you’re betraying him.”

“God, it’s eerie how you get me. Yeah. Exactly . I’ll tell him when we get back into town.”

He scoffs at me. “You won’t have a choice if your boyfriend comes to town. You can’t avoid it forever.”

“Yeah, yeah… I know.”

Geoff and I met before winter break last year in environmental justice class.

He’s going to be an environmental lawyer, which is so awesome.

I love that we have so much in common, and I can’t wait for this next phase of our lives to start.

I especially can’t wait until he visits Cannon Beach and meets my family.

God, I hope Mike likes him. Even more, I hope Geoff likes Mike.

If they don’t, I’m not sure what I’ll do.

Once my shirt is buttoned up and my socks and shoes are on, we head to the kitchen and pour one more shot of lighter fluid. I’m not sure cheap whiskey even qualifies as whiskey.

“I need a girl under me tonight,” Wes says, raising his glass and downing the harsh liquor. He winces and coughs because it’s fucking nasty, but perfect when you don’t have money and want a buzz for a party.

I toss mine back, too. “Wes, you have the worst luck with girls,” I wheeze from the burn .

“That’s why I’m just going to have fun. I’m tired of looking for Miss Right. Hopefully, one day, she’ll just fall into my lap.”

“Yeah, I’m not sure it works like that,” I chuckle. “God, I want some fun, too. It’s been a while since Geoff and I have been together like that, between classes, work, and finals. My dick is lonely as fuck.”

“Ugh, TMI, Den. Is lover boy meeting us there?”

“Nah, he said he’s got to work. Oh, and I have a meeting with Professor Mitchell tomorrow in the early afternoon. So, I won’t get to see Geoff then, either.”

Wes raises a brow. “On a Saturday?”

“Yeah, he’s busy with end of the year shit.

You know, he’s been a great mentor for the past few years, so he wanted to see me off before I leave college for good.

I’m not sure I would’ve survived college without all his support and encouragement.

” I put my shot glass in the sink and rinse it.

“Anyway, Geoff and I will meet up tomorrow night.”

“Cool! Now, let’s go party! I need to get laid!” Wes whoops, making me laugh.

The fraternity house Wes belongs to, but no longer lives in, isn’t too far, so we walk.

Since we don’t have to worry about driving, we can get trashed.

The night is balmy, and the area is alive with students ready to graduate or start summer break.

Music filters out of homes and apartments; there’s screaming, and cars driving too fast. A girl shrieks, then giggles in the distance.

I shake my head and laugh at the chaos. God, I’m going to miss it here.

But I miss Cannon Beach more, the place that always soothes my soul, especially around my stoic and strong friend.

And I miss my girl, Willow. When we first found her, she was so skinny and scrawny that the name just came to me.

Now she’s grown into a healthy, beautiful dog.

Wes and I make it to the house that’s the place to be tonight. There’s a line to get in as we’re carded, so that we can drink. The university has been cracking down on drugs and drinking recently, so the fraternities and sororities are being careful.

As soon as we walk in, the house is packed with students.

“Drinks first!” Wes yells over the throbbing dance music.

I nod and follow him toward the kitchen, where shots are being served. We toss back two of the sickly sweet drinks before grabbing ourselves a beer from the keg.

When a familiar hip-hop beat plays, Wes and I throw our heads back and laugh. “We are so dancing to this!” I shout over the noise.

We head toward the living room that’s been converted to a dance floor, packed with people. Wes and I throw ourselves in there, jumping up and down with a fist in the air to Jump Around by House of Pain.

“Shit, this song is so old!” he laughs.

“It’s a classic!”

Soon, girls are bouncing with us and singing along. I don’t mind. It’s all fun.

After some more drinks, I’m starting to get toasty and a little buzzed.

Wes and I dance some more, hoping to lure some girls to him.

Sure enough, two of them hit on him. He wraps an arm around one of them, gyrating into her as the other girl sandwiches him from behind as they all dance together.

I shake my head and smile. Wes is in heaven right now.

One day, he’s going to find the girl who will pin him down, but not tonight.

I wish Geoff were here, but it’s still a fun party. It would be nice to dance with him, and I feel a bit like a third wheel.

After several beers, I need to piss. I tell Wes that I’m off to look for a bathroom. He nods and continues to dance with the girls.

The two bathrooms downstairs have long lines, so I head upstairs to look for another one.

My bladder is starting to hurt as I desperately search for a place to empty it.

I finally stumble into a bedroom that has a bathroom inside.

Thank god. There’s a couple fucking on the bed, but I ignore them as I rush to the toilet.

“Don’t mind me…” I mutter. “Just need to take a quick piss and I’m outta here.”

I quickly relieve myself, and after washing my hands, I come out, my head now really spinning from all the alcohol.

Wow, the couple is really going at it now, and I sneak a peek at the man sitting up, pumping his hips into his partner, whom I can’t see.

What I can see, though, is the large tattoo on his upper back on the right side—a tattoo I would recognize anywhere.

It’s a large rendering of Lady Justice, and a beautiful piece.

It took hours and hours to get it done. I would know since I was there holding his damn hand as he winced and whined through the pain.

My gut twists painfully as my dizzy mind tries to deny what I’m seeing. There’s no way Geoff is fucking someone other than me. My brain keeps telling me it has to be someone else. Geoff wouldn’t cheat on me. He loves me. He told me he does, many times.

I close my eyes and shake my head, trying to clear it before opening them again. Nope, it’s not my buzzed imagination .

My eyes close again to the most recent memory of us in bed after having sex. His fingers gently comb away my sweaty bangs. “ I love you, Denny. You’re so special .” I feel how special I am when he says those words, but then they twist because they were all lies.

I squeeze my eyes tightly. I don’t want to see his thrusts into someone else, his familiar body fucking, his cologne lingering in the air mingled with the smells of sex. Fuck, the noises and dirty talk in that voice I would know anywhere. It makes it all more real.