Page 22 of Heal You (The Study You #3)

Rushing across the busy main street, Jan took refuge under a bus shelter.

The rain had come out of nowhere this afternoon, and now Jan looked like a drowned rat.

It hadn’t been forecast, it was meant to be glorious today, but no such luck.

Jan didn’t often find the time to head into the city for retail therapy, her shopping sprees usually extended no further than online stores, so this was a nice change. With or without the rain.

She had already taken several bags back to the car, and in the next few minutes, she was meeting Gillian as she passed through on her way to a meeting in the city’s central library.

It would be brief, but at least Gillian would know Jan was still alive and surviving.

She didn’t know what images her best friend had been conjuring up in her mind, but Gillian texted Jan at least once a day to ask what she was doing and how she was feeling.

As Jan peered around the bus shelter, she could see the walkway to the main shopping area.

It would only take her a minute or two to reach the next shelter, but did she want to risk it?

The rain just wasn’t letting up today. Still, if she wanted to spend a few minutes with Gillian, she would have to make a run for it.

Thank God you wore your Converse today.

She rushed from under the bus shelter and kept as close to the side of the buildings along the main road as she could.

It didn’t really help to keep her dry since the wind had the rain heading in all directions, but she could see Gillian in the distance.

She’d always been the sensible one who carried an umbrella in her bag at all times.

Gillian laughed as Jan neared, quickly reaching out and pulling her under the umbrella. “I don’t know when you’re going to learn, I swear.”

“Just…share the bloody umbrella with me and mind your own business.” Jan grinned as she leaned in and kissed Gillian on the cheek. “Hi. Nice to see you.”

“Come on. Let’s stroll.” Gillian linked an arm through Jan’s. They wandered off in the general direction of the library, blue sky barely visible in the distance. Maybe it would stop in time for Jan to dry out before she got back to the hotel. “How are you?”

“I was feeling great as I got into the city and the sun was shining, but now…not so much.” Jan wiped a raindrop from her nose and laughed. “At least it’s not cold.”

“Always a plus.” Gillian squeezed Jan’s arm against her. “Finn was asking about you. She said to say hi, and she wants to know when you’re coming over for dinner.”

Jan should probably make an effort and take up the invitation, but she was too busy dedicating her evenings to Morgan whenever she had a night off. “I’ll come over next week, maybe.”

Gillian side-eyed Jan as she lowered her umbrella once they were undercover again. “You seem awfully busy and unavailable for someone living in a hotel and who has no job. What exactly are you doing with your days while you’re not working?”

Jan shrugged. “Just…finding a new routine. Enjoying some shopping. Taking time out for me .” The day would soon come when Jan would have to tell Gillian about Morgan.

She was just trying to put it off as long as she possibly could.

“I may look empty-handed right now, but I have several bags in the boot of my car.

“Oo, did you buy anything you don’t actually like that I can take off your hands?” Gillian wiggled her eyebrows and laughed. “You always used to pass things on to me.”

“Probably. Give me a few hours to decide I hate one or two of the things I bought, and they’re all yours.”

Gillian sighed as they slowed their pace and perused shop windows. “Now that the jokes are out of the way, how are you really doing?”

“I’m…good. Great, really.”

Gillian turned to Jan and gave her a knowing look. “You’re the worst liar.”

“I’m not lying, Gill. I am good. I’m feeling positive, and I guess in some way, I’m looking forward to a new future.”

“Have you got yourself a lawyer yet?”

“Mmhmm. They came highly recommended from a friend at the office.” Jan didn’t know what the divorce would entail, but she would be fine. She had to be. “Any idea how long it takes for it all to be finalised?”

Gillian’s brows rose as her eyes widened.

“It depends entirely on how brutal either of you play this. If you don’t agree on the terms set out, it’s back to the drawing board.

There will be a lot of compromising and whatnot.

Probably a lot of grovelling from Phil, too.

Just don’t let him beat you down with some bullshit offer. ”

“I don’t think he’d do that to me.” Jan was brave saying that.

Phil had just fucked another woman for a year behind her back, but when it came to their finances…

he would likely be very fair. Jan had put in just as much as him over the years.

“To be honest, I just want enough to move on. Find a place, keep myself afloat until I know what’s next. ”

Gillian snorted. “If I was you, I’d be taking the bastard for everything he’s got.”

Jan could see why Gillian would say that, but it wasn’t the woman Jan was. She couldn’t do that to Phil. He’d met someone else, and that was the end of it. Jan wouldn’t penalise him for falling out of love with her. “He claims he still loves me and wants us to work it out.”

“At least you have that. Dave didn’t want anything to do with me when I found out about the affair.”

Dave had always been a completely different person to Phil.

Even Phil kept him at arm’s length. They’d known one another for a long time, but Phil always used to tell Jan that there was something about Dave that he didn’t quite get a good feeling about.

Seems he’d been right all along. Only now, they could add Phil to the same shit list that Dave was on.

A usually decent guy or not, he had a black mark through his name as far as Jan and Gillian were concerned.

“Phil is giving me space. The only time he tries his luck with apologies is whenever I see him.”

“At least he isn’t hounding you. That’s something, I guess.”

As they reached the end of the outdoor shopping area, Gillian turned to Jan. “Can we meet next week for a coffee at the hotel? Or something stronger if that’s what we need on the day…”

“Yes. That would be lovely. I’ll text you when I know what days I’m available, okay?” Jan’s phone pinged in the pocket of her jeans. She would take care of it once Gillian had left. “I’m going to pick up a few more things and then head back.”

“Okay, love. It’s been lovely seeing you. And you look well, so that’s naturally put my mind at ease.”

Jan embraced Gillian and sighed. “Have you ever known me to fall apart?”

“No. But that doesn’t mean you won’t when you think nobody is paying attention.” Gillian drew back and smiled. “Don’t think you’re alone. I can be there for you at the drop of a hat, and you know it.”

“You’re going to be late for your meeting.

There is no way I’m letting you put the blame on me for that, so I suggest you get a move on, and I’ll speak to you soon.

” As Jan watched Gillian take a couple of steps back, she reached into her pocket for her phone.

“I promise I’ll speak to you soon, okay? ”

Gillian nodded. “Okay. Bye, love. Take care of yourself.”

“I always do.” Jan winked and offered a small wave in Gillian’s direction. Her best friend walked away, that confidence Jan once possessed exuding from Gillian Masters.

She lifted her phone, grinning from ear to ear when she saw Morgan’s name.

Hey. I know it’s short notice but I’m in the city picking up a few supplies. Did you by any chance want to get some lunch with me before I start my shift in a few hours?

Jan pressed her back to the wall and sighed. Was this going to be a common occurrence between them now? God, Jan deeply hoped so.

I’m already in the city and I’d love to have lunch with you. Where should I meet you?

Morgan started to respond immediately.

Perfect. I’m outside La Casa right now. Fancy something to eat in there?

Jan would happily eat at a McDonald’s if it meant she was sharing space with Morgan Tate.

I’m on my way!

* * *

Satisfied after a beautiful and unexpected lunch with Jan, Morgan took her hand as they reached the second floor of the multi-storey carpark.

It wasn’t something they could do in public—Morgan understood that—so while they were alone in here, she wanted to make the most of it.

On so many occasions over lunch, she had almost taken Jan’s hand, but Morgan would get used to less public displays of affection.

She would have to if this was going to survive. Whatever this was, anyway.

“Thank you for lunch,” Jan said as she leaned in and kissed Morgan’s cheek. “I need to lie down now. I ate too much.”

“Me, too.” Morgan worked out in her head how long she could relax for once she got back. She was due to be in the bar at six, and it was only two now. “Maybe I’ll get the chance. Depends if anyone manages to stop me between walking through the door to the bar and reaching the door to the flat.”

“Is that an issue for you? Someone always needing something because you live above the place?”

“I think so, yeah. I’m kind of always just there, you know?

I think people forget that I have a life that extends beyond the bar.

” As they reached Jan’s car, she turned and rested against the bonnet.

Morgan stood between her legs, drawing her into a kiss, smiling against Jan’s lips as she tried to pull back. “Babe, it’s fine. Nobody is around.”

Jan laughed. “You think I care if someone sees us? No. I’m more concerned by the fact I stink of garlic.”

Morgan lifted a shoulder. “I happen to love garlic.”

Jan hooked her fingers through Morgan’s belt loops and smiled up at her. “I don’t want to leave you now that I’ve spent some time with you.”

“Believe me, going to work is the last thing on my mind right now.” All Morgan wanted to do in this moment was lie down and snuggle up with Jan.

The fact it had rained all morning and afternoon only encouraged that mood.

Warm, cosy, content. Those were the things Morgan was striving for these days.

“But I always love to see you turning up at the bar, so you know, keep that in mind.”

“I intend to show up at some point this evening—don’t you worry about that.” Jan wrapped a hand around the back of Morgan’s neck and offered her a slow, lingering kiss. “A nice cocktail, a great atmosphere, and the perfect view. What more could I ask for?”

“A lottery win?” Morgan said with a quirked brow.

“Where would we run off to if I did win big?”

“Anywhere we wanted to.” Morgan could happily daydream about that scenario for the rest of her life. “Somewhere hot. Somewhere with good food. Somewhere that makes you happy.”

“I don’t need a lot to make me happy, Morgan. This, right here, right now, makes me incredibly happy.”

Morgan’s brows drew together. “Standing in a cold carpark makes you happy?”

“If I’m standing in a cold carpark with you, yes.”

Oh, Morgan was never going to keep hold of this woman.

It just didn’t seem possible if she allowed her mind to wander towards the future.

Jan was worlds apart from anything Morgan could offer her.

But for the time being, she would enjoy this.

She would treat Jan the way she always should have been treated.

“When you say things like that, it just reminds me that you’re going to break my heart one day.

” Morgan drew a thumb across Jan’s bottom lip.

“But when you do, promise you’ll go easy on me. ”

“I don’t make it a habit to go around breaking people’s hearts. Other people have that covered already.” Jan dipped her head and toyed with one of the buttons on Morgan’s shirt. “I don’t know what the future holds, but I hope you’ll feature in it.”

“Yeah?” Morgan lifted Jan’s chin with two fingers, her pulse quickening when Jan looked up at her with those blue eyes. “You mean that?”

“I do. And if that doesn’t happen for some reason, please know that I’d never do anything to intentionally hurt you.”

“I know you wouldn’t.” Even though Morgan was still getting to know Jan—they’d kinda skipped that stage and gone straight in for the kill—she could safely say that Jan didn’t have the ability to intentionally hurt anyone.

“I’m one of those people who prepares for the worst. It’s easier than getting carried away with something that makes me unbelievably happy. ”

“I understand what you’re saying.” Jan regarded Morgan with a small smile. “I hope I can prove you wrong and this grows to be something beautiful.”

“Hey, I do, too. But I am mindful of what you’re going through right now.

I think it’s important to remember that we’re not just two single women who found a connection.

Even though I want it to feel that way, that’s not how it happened.

We met one another when we were both having a rough time.

You more so, but the point remains.” Morgan stroked a fingertip up Jan’s neck and smiled.

“ You are more than I ever expected. Don’t forget that. ”

“Come back to my hotel room with me and rest for a while.”

Morgan’s smile spread wider. “I’d love to if I wouldn’t be imposing.”

“You could never impose.” Jan pushed off the bonnet of her car and crushed her lips to Morgan’s. It deepened, but Morgan would prefer to spend the next couple of hours kissing Jan somewhere far warmer than this carpark.

She drew back and wrinkled her nose. “Ew. You stink of garlic.”

That earned Morgan a swat to the stomach from Jan, but they both laughed as Jan wrapped her arms around Morgan’s waist. “Good thing you love garlic, isn’t it?”

God, Morgan just wanted to spend forever kissing this woman. The day she lost it, she wouldn’t know what to do with herself. She lay a hand on the side of Jan’s jaw, their lips just millimetres apart. “Come on. Let’s get out of here.”