Page 13 of Heal You (The Study You #3)

Placing her palm to her forehead, Morgan stared up at the ceiling, too terrified to move.

She knew what was going to happen this morning.

Jan would wake up, realise where she was, and run for the hills.

It was inevitable, but Morgan had allowed herself to get caught up in the moment last night, and she wouldn’t change any of it.

She hadn’t known what to expect when it came to intimacy with Jan, but fuck, that woman could go all night long.

And she had. Now, as Morgan lay here, she had to wonder exactly what Jan’s reaction would be.

She desperately hoped it wouldn’t be anything too heartbreaking.

Morgan wasn’t sure she could handle being kicked to the curb right now.

Still, she had to prepare herself for the potential.

Jan’s head was up her arse, and that was a guarantee.

As she slowly and carefully sat up on her elbows, she spied the coffee machine through the open bedroom door.

She was going to need caffeine soon and, ideally, some breakfast. At least lie to me and have breakfast with me , Morgan thought as she slid out from the cover and pulled a hoodie on.

She quickly stepped into a pair of shorts and tiptoed across the room.

Once she was safely outside, her heart pounding, she closed the bedroom door over and moved further into her living room.

Jan’s blouse and jeans were situated on opposite sides of the open plan space, her underwear hanging from the coffee table.

It had been a long time since Morgan had enjoyed a night like last night.

Or rather, it had been a long time since she’d spent the night with someone she genuinely cared about.

Someone she felt she knew well enough to allow herself to care.

Someone…Morgan would really love to see again.

But then she swallowed and braced her hands against the kitchen worktop.

Finn was probably going to smack her when she found out about this.

Morgan would like to think nobody would know about it, not unless Jan wanted them to, but was life really that simple? Around here…absolutely not.

Knowing Morgan’s luck, Finn or Gillian themselves had probably caught Jan and Morgan fucking in the bar last night. It didn’t matter if the shutters were down, and it didn’t matter that the place was locked up. Morgan was known to be that unfortunate.

She exhaled a deep breath and pushed off the counter. She really needed that coffee she’d been thinking about. As she powered the machine on and waited patiently for the light to stop flashing, she felt a presence in the room. Jan, without a doubt, was watching her.

She turned and revealed her best fake smile. If Jan was getting ready to leave, Morgan refused to show her disappointment. They hadn’t even had the chance to talk about whatever the hell they were doing with one another, and that was before Morgan had let go and found herself deep inside Jan. “Hi.”

Jan leaned against the bedroom doorframe, her blonde hair tousled. “Good morning.”

“Can I get you some coffee?” Morgan tried to inconspicuously shake her hands at her sides, hopefully forcing away her nerves at the same time, but Jan’s stare pinned her in place. “Or something to eat?”

“Do you have somewhere you need to be?”

Morgan frowned. “No, why?”

“Then I’ll just take coffee for now. Maybe we can make breakfast once you’ve got some colour back in your face.” Jan pushed off the doorframe and crossed the room. “Would you like me to take care of the drinks?”

“N-no. It’s all good. I’ve got it.” Morgan cleared her throat and nodded slowly. “Before I get on with this, I…wanted to ask if you’re okay.”

“Should I not be?” Jan lifted a brow when she stopped beside Morgan and mirrored her position as she rested back against the counter. She wore one of Morgan’s T-shirts and a pair of boxer shorts she must have taken from the chest of drawers.

“I hope you are, but last night was…” Morgan sighed. “Last night happened, Jan. While I wouldn’t change any of it, it happened, and I need to know you’re okay.”

Jan turned and cupped Morgan’s cheek. “I’m okay. I’m great, actually. A little sore in places, but very okay.”

Morgan relaxed instantly. She knew Jan would be open and honest with her, but that worry had still been at the back of her mind.

It was hard not to hold space for it when Jan—a technically married woman—had woken up naked in her bed.

The fact Morgan had thought Jan was straight was the furthest thing from her mind today. Jan was not straight.

“Hey,” Jan said as she pressed herself to Morgan. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah. Just worried that you’re going to realise you’ve made a huge mistake.” Morgan smiled weakly, but Jan took her hands and brought them up between them. “But if you’re sure everything is okay?—”

“I’m sure that everything is okay. That everything is going to be okay. I don’t regret last night if that’s what you’re wondering.”

“I hoped you didn’t, but I had to expect the possibility, you know?” Morgan cast her gaze on their hands. “I had the most amazing night with you.”

“Likewise.”

“And I don’t know. I…kinda wanna see you again whenever I can.” Morgan didn’t know why or when she had become so needy for this woman, but it was true. Jan was all she thought about lately. “If you’d like that.”

“I would like that.”

“Yeah?” Morgan’s world lit up in a multitude of colours. Jan, Gillian’s best friend, wanted to see her again? Fuck! “You…want to see me again?”

“Mmhmm.” Jan blushed as she shook her head and smiled. “I can’t believe you want to see me again.”

“You’ve got to be joking. You have met you, right?”

Jan reached around Morgan and sat a cup under the spout of the coffee machine.

She pressed the button, and the beans started to grind.

“I have met me. Right now, this me is a little bruised but not broken. If you can give me whatever time I need to figure everything out, then I’ll be in a much better headspace to figure this out with you.

Because I don’t know about you, but it all means something to me. ”

“It means something to me, too.”

Jan took the cup and handed it to Morgan, then made her own coffee. “You felt the connection, too, right?”

Morgan lifted herself up onto the counter and gazed down at Jan.

“For me, the connection is strong.” While Morgan enjoyed being with women, it wasn’t often she slept with them so quickly.

Not anymore. Even Amanda hadn’t brought out the desire Morgan had last night.

“If at any point it’s too much for you, please tell me.

I’m already scared to say or do the wrong thing. ”

“All I expect from you is to be yourself.” Jan moaned as she sipped her coffee, moving until she was standing between Morgan’s legs. “Be you, that’s all I want.”

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but you seem remarkably calm for a woman who left her husband a week ago. Why am I the one panicking?”

“I don’t know why you’re panicking.” Jan sipped her coffee again, then set it down on the counter beside Morgan.

She palmed her thighs as she looked up at her, giving Morgan the perfect view of those deep blue eyes.

“As for me, I don’t see the point in worrying.

Yes, I left my husband a week ago, but I’m finding it hard to hold onto any sort of feeling for him given how we ended. ”

Morgan reached out and held Jan’s chin. “That guy is out of his fucking mind. Trust me.”

“I don’t want to talk about him. I want to spend my morning with you if you’ll have me here.”

“You know I’ll have you here any time, any day.” Morgan slid from the counter and wrapped Jan up in her arms. She nuzzled into her neck and said, “By the way, you can steal my clothes any time you like, too.”

“It’s a good job you said that. I’m going to need to borrow some after my shower if I’m staying here a while longer. Hopefully, you have a spare unused toothbrush lying around.”

Morgan kissed Jan’s forehead and sighed. “Anything you want.”

* * *

Humming lightly as Morgan palmed her shin, Jan rested her head back on the couch cushions, feeling surprisingly relaxed given what had happened last night.

They’d spent the last hour in this position, Jan’s legs resting in Morgan’s lap, the initial tension in the air no longer threatening upheaval.

Jan didn’t need that. She didn’t want it.

She was fully aware of what she was doing last night, and as she lay here, her only regret was that she wasn’t still naked in bed with Morgan.

Back in the day, she’d had a healthy sex life with Phil.

Healthy, just not quite as exciting as she would have liked it to be.

But with work commitments and business plans often getting in the way over the last ten years or so, the sex had dwindled.

So much so that Jan didn’t even bother bringing it up in conversation anymore.

There had been a period of time when she would have fought for their intimacy, a time when she would have surprised Phil with something that would get his heart racing, but Jan had known it had felt more like a chore to him.

He never seemed happy at the end of it. That had really become an issue over the last year or so, and now Jan knew why.

It wasn’t because he had work on his mind or that he’d been at the office until a ridiculous hour.

No, it was because he’d been getting what he needed from Anais.

“I miss my house,” Jan said quietly as she stared up at the ceiling. “And my garden.”