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Oh God, I’m staring at Tiller’s penis. No. . . cock.Cock’sthe right word here. Strong, powerful—beautiful. That’s what he is. Believe or not, I’ve never seen it this close up.
“It’s pretty.”
Wrong. Thing. To. Say.
He jerks his eyes to mine. “What the fuck did you just say?”
I’ve upset him.
Sitting up, I tentatively reach out to touch him, my fingers wrapping around his hardness, stroking from base to tip and waiting for his reaction.
“Don’t tease me.” A groan falls from his lips, his head falling forward as he thrusts into my hand. Okay, good. He’s forgotten. Because I’ve seen porn before, and I think he might find this sexy and distract him even further from my lack of expertise in penis, or penises? Is it plural? Whatever. I decide I’m going to put him in my mouth. Or try to at least.
I stare at the drop of clear like fluid collection on the tip. While Tiller and I have been sexual with one another, and done everything under the sun but intercourse, I’veneverput him in my mouth or never tasted his cum. I’m curious. I want to know what he tastes likesobadly.
Bringing my fingertips to the head, I swipe my finger over the tip. With a grin, I push my hand toward him like I’m going to smear it on his lips like he did to me.
He catches my hand, glaring. “Don’t even think about it.”
Giggling, I retract my hand and suck on my finger. While it’s not horrible, I can see why girls don’t swallow. It’s not like I want a mouth full ofthat. I’d probably choke and gag and he’d love it because he seems to like when I gag.
“Don’t just fuckin’ lick it. Suck it like you mean it. You know you want to. Suck it like you did the bottle,” he says, as if he knew what I was thinking. “Show me how bad you want me.”
I lick him once again and it’s salty. So unlike what I thought it’d taste like. Desire floods through me at the noises he makes, the sharp intake of his breath. Without hesitation, I take him all the way in.
And then I gag. Hot huh?
Tiller throws his head back and groans, like I’ve done something incredibly sexy. While I’m glad he’s distracted from my previous remark, why would me gagging turn him on? I don’t stop. I lower my mouth, all the way down. He grabs a fistful of my hair and moves my head the way he wants it, with the right speed. Though it’s not forceful, it’s just enough pressure to let me know I’m not going anywhere until he tells me so.
“Fuck yeah. Just like that.” He guides me in an up and down motion. “You look hot with my cock in your mouth.”
Unsure still, I peek up at him for encouragement and that seems to be exactly what he wants to see. He groans and shoves my head down. He hits the back of my throat and I gag again. I’m not sure I like that, but I don’t stop him because while it’s not all that enjoyable having something the size of an eggplant in your mouth, it’s strangely erotic seeing him react like this.
My insides tingle in anticipation of what it will finally feel like having him inside me. I’ve imagined it, only him, for so long, I’m scared it won’t live up to what it’s really like. But then I realize that’s crazy. It’s Tiller. It’ll be everything I’ve ever imagined, and then some.
He pulls away, yanking my mouth off him. “That’s enough.”
Wiping my mouth, I look up at him, my breathing becoming heavier. Crap. What happens next?
He reaches over to his nightstand for a condom and immediately sheathes himself in one. There’s certainly no hesitation on his part, is there?
My heart is pounding so hard I think he can hear it. With a hand on my chest, he pushes me back against the mattress, then spreads my legs. He’s in position and it’s now that I realize there’s no going back.
“Tell me you’re sure.” He waits for me to tell him no again. This is usually when I stop him.
I giggle lightly. “You act as if I’m jumping off a cliff.”
“You kinda are. There’s no going back once I have you.”
“I want you,” I assure him. “But um, be gentle.”
He laughs. “I can’t guarantee ya anything.” It’s his tone I notice that’s different. It’s low and anxious. Wary even. His eyes search mine, looking for something. Maybe an emotion he’s afraid he’s going to find.
My heart pounds a million miles an hour. I bite my lips and then venture to add, “What about what you promised?”
His brow furrows, his eyes guarded. “What?”
“Where you. . . uh, you know, the part where you said you’d tell me you loved me.”