Page 54

I nod, and peel it off. No bra, no panties, and yeah, so I’m completely naked.
Tiller scowls, dropping the towel next to my dress on the concrete floor, the instantiable hunger returning. “You’re mean.”
It’s enough that it breaks the awkwardness between us though and he smiles and leans in, his warm lips covering my hardened nipple. My hands move to his wet hair, tightening in the thick darkness. I have this craving. A hunger rooted deep inside me I can’t satisfy without him. It’s not a want, no, it’s something like a physiological craving.
It’shim.
Do I regret the other night with Tiller?
No, I can’t say that I do. I don’t regret much of anything I do with him because it’s the excitement I lack in life that he provides.
What I do regret is leaving River that night. I didn’t get home until four in the morning, and she’d barely slept, constantly asking Tracy when I’d be back. I felt absolutely horrible for it.
In the morning, standing in the foyer waiting for Tiller, I ask her, “Are you okay that I was gone?”
Playing with the handle of her suitcase, she seems to have forgot, or maybe it’s the excitement of leaving town, but her eyes are bright as she waits by the front door for Tiller to pick us up. “Where you go? I missed you.”
I swallow over a lump in my throat at the memories of last night. I kiss her forehead. “I was at Tiller’s house,” I admit, drawing back to watch her expression.
Tight and clinging, she worms her arms around my neck. “I don’t want to go to the wedding.”
Me either.
My cell phone beeps and I hear the rumble of his truck in the driveway. “I have a surprise for you.”
“What?”
“Tiller’s coming with us.”
You would have thought I told her she could have a new puppy at the excitement she shows when she sees him at the door and rips it open.
“Hey,” he says when he sees me. His eyes burn like his touch, all reminders of what we did and how even though I don’t feel his touch physically, his presence is enough. His eyes drop to River. “Ready?”
She nods and grabs her bag. “Yup.”
Well, that went easy, didn’t it?
Don’t get too excited. It’s about the only easy part of the weekend. I’m sure of it.
I leave Kona with Tracy next door because the last thing I need is a dog in Tiller’s truck. Actually, he flat out told me no. And I couldn’t blame him. It’s a brand-new truck and Kona slobbers.
Given River’s lack of conversation lately, I will say, I’ve never heard her talk as much as she does when we’re driving up to Muir Beach with Tiller. We take his truck, because he never lets anyone drive but him if he’s in the car. He hates not being in control. You even have to drug him when he’s on a plane, it’s that bad.
His shoulder’s healing. Once they put it back into place at the event. It was just a matter of healing and not using the shoulder for a few weeks. Other than you know, tossing me in a pool. It essentially got him out of rounds five and six of the After Dark tour though, so he certainly wasn’t complaining about going to a wedding. Well, not yet at least.
While Tiller and River talk about lizards, Alexandra texts me, outraged Tiller’s coming to the wedding.
Alexandra: I can’t believe you’re bringing him.
Me: He’s my plus one.
Alexandra: You weren’t given a plus one for the wedding.
Me: Well, then I won’t come and neither will your flower girl.
I’m getting bolder with Alexandra, and I think maybe I might have Tiller to thank for that. He gives me the courage to stand up for myself.
It’s ten minutes when she texts me back.