Page 122 of The Freedom You Seek

Calling it a night, I quickly washed up and changed before joining Nayana in the small bed. My arms itched to pull her to me, but considering her back—which had to be a giant bruise—I decided against it with a heavy heart. She needed time to heal, and we had so little of that already, so I should at least let her have a restful sleep. Instead, I allowed another tendril of smoke to curl around her wrist so I could at least feel a small connection. Pondering about everything, I closed my eyes and slowly drifted off.

The next few days were surprisingly uneventful, and I couldn’t help but think that it felt like the calm before the storm—or the eye of a hurricane. During the day, we traveled the main roads, and at night, we either camped or slept in roadside inns. Everyone—even me—knew how many more risks we were taking compared to our earlier caution, but if I understood one thing from the tense mood around me, it was that our time was running out.

Luckily, everyone had healed as much as possible. Fig had earned another scar, adding to his collection, right on the bridge of his nose. Thain still wore bandages, and my back was sore, but all in all, these weren’t problems we couldn’t deal with.

The day after the attack of the Wailor, Dion handed me a piece of parchment containing the ritualistic words spoken during the ceremony part of the Rite. I’d known that an oath was involved, but reading the words for the first or the tenth time had made me feel uncomfortable with the almost-decision I’d formed after talking to Dion about it. Still, I learned the words by heart and talked to the soldiers about other customs involving the Rite.

I was a bit baffled. I thought that what Dion called the ceremony would be the whole Rite—but oh gods, was I wrong. Antas had explained that in the old days, bindings were huge celebrations and incredibly joyous occasions that could last for several days. Several rites were performed, all under the umbrella term of the Rite of Binding. How all this could be done in a deserted and destroyed city that had been uninhabited for two hundred winters was a mystery to me, but he tried to calm me down. Except for the main ceremony, everything else was just decoration.

It was during this conversation with Antas that I realized I’d made up my mind. The only way I left for myself as an out was that I hadn’t told Dion just yet, in case I'd change my mind, but somehow, both of us could tell that we wouldn’t back out anymore.

The mood between us was companionable but with underlying tension, and for the first time since we’d met, we acted mostly civil to each other. We didn’t fight, but we also didn’t get all cozy either.

More often than not, I would find one of the tendrils curled around one of my wrists or ankles, not restricting, just seeking the contact Dion normally sought directly. This was strange in a way, but it didn’t feel important enough to open a discussion. Over the course of the days, I’d started to think of the magic smoke as something akin to a rather clingy pet, as insane as that sounded.

The days blended together while we were in a weird in-between state where it seemed that even the worlds themselves held their breath.Maybe it was arrogant to think that my decision must influence everyone and everything around me, but I couldn’t help how I felt and that the constant tension affected me more than I let on.

When I woke up this morning, the energy in our group was even more tense than it had been in the last few days, and it didn’t take me long to figure out why. The ultimatum mentioned in the letter—the one I had yet to see for myself—was up.

Had I asked to read the offending piece of mail? Of course I had, but I’d been confronted with a lot of male resistance. The joke was on me, and I should have foreseen it from the start.

Carrying my bag over to our horse, I was alone for once, but as I strolled toward our horse, Antas stopped me midway.

“Nayana, talk to me for just a second, please.”

“Sure.”

“Take this. It is for you, should you and Dion decide on binding. It is customary for the families of the participating Wielder and Amplifier to give gifts, so I wanted you to have at least something.”

He gently placed a small bundle wrapped in purple velvet in my hand, and I smiled at Antas with tears in my eyes before hugging him tight.

“Thank you. I…that…”

“I know. Just open it.” Antas hugged briefly—and very stiffly—back before we separated. After putting my bag on the ground, I unwrapped the velvet and found the most beautiful bracelet I’d ever seen inside. It was crafted from a golden metal with shimmering stones that changed their color depending on the angle of the light. The whole piece was delicate and absolutely stunning. “Antas, it’s too much.”

Antas smiled at me and shook his head. “It is not. It belonged to Dion’s mother, and I am sure she would have wanted you to wear it.”

I stared at Antas with my mouth open. Like that, the expensive bracelet had turned into an invaluable family heirloom. “Why do you have that? I mean, you’ve been months on the road. Why did you bring such a piece with you from home?”

All Antas did was wink at me. He actuallywinkedat me—he, the most serious man I knew—although, at times, Fig rivaled him for that title.

“Thank you…it’s beautiful.” My voice cracked as I gently caressed the colorful precious stones.

Determination washed over me, and I slammed the back door I’d left open for myself shut. I would go through with the binding—there was no other way. “Would you help me put it on, please?”

“Of course, Nayana.”

Antas took the precious bracelet from me and wrapped it carefully around my arm. He had some problems with the clasp, as his hands were massive compared to thedelicate closing, but in the end, the ornament wrapped snugly around my wrist, sparkling in the sun. “Again, thank you. I have no other words for you—I’m speechless.”

“That’s a first, then.”

“Did you just make a joke, Antas?”

“Don’t tell anyone else. I have an image to uphold.”

Laughing, I felt light and happy because I’d finally come to a conclusion and also because of the friends I’d found during the last few months.

Of course, I should have known that such positive feelings on this journey wouldn’t last too long.