Page 139 of Should Our Hearts Catch Fire

It’s Gabe’s turn to flinch. “It was selfish. I adore you and I’d like to spend the rest of my life with you. And I couldn’t imagine keeping a secret so big.” He opens himself up to his limit, wanting to make sure that Ellis can feel the truth in the words. “I never want to have to lie to you.”

Ellis groans, turning around to face the counter. “You won’t even let me be mad at you, will you?” he grouses, like Gabe is being difficult.

The situation is not funny, but a smile fights its way to Gabe’s lips. “Sorry?”

Ellis responds with an annoyed huff, his energy flaring up with the contradictory emotions of affection and irritation.

Is it wrong that Gabe finds that ridiculously adorable? Seizing the opportunity, he approaches Ellis and glues himself to his back, winding his arms around Ellis’ waist.

Instead of tensing up as Gabe feared, Ellis’ whole body relaxes, sinking back into Gabe like he’s been waiting to be held. Gabe squeezes him tighter, burrowing his face in Ellis’ nape, inhaling his familiar, comforting scent.

“What do I do, Gabriel?” Ellis asks quietly. If they weren’t so close, Gabe probably wouldn’t hear him.

Tentatively, he moves one hand from Ellis’ waist and places it at the center of his chest. “You follow your heart.”

The heart in question gives a powerful thump.

“My heart is a mess.”

“Then it’s a beautiful mess.” Gabe kisses the side of his neck, reveling in the shiver that runs through Ellis’ body. “I love the mess.”

Ellis’ shoulders droop. “Don’t see what’s to love.”

“Don’t do that,” Gabe scolds, using a gentle but firm tone. He prompts Ellis to turn around, meeting resistance at first, but eventually Ellis lets him.

“Why me?” he asks, eyes downcast. “It could’ve been anyone else.”

Gabe grits his teeth, fighting down an overwhelming surge of anger. If he had his way, he’d hunt down everyone who’s even looked at Ellis the wrong way.

Fuck them. Fuck all of them. Everyone who’s ever made Ellis feel like there’s something wrong with him, like he doesn’t deserve to be loved. Like he’s anything less than absolutely perfect.

He takes Ellis’ beautiful, sad face between his palms, coaxing him to look up.

“You’re wrong,” he tells him. “So very wrong. It couldn’t have been anyone else. You were meant to find me. And I was meant to wait until you came along.”

Despite his gift, and all the supernatural occurrences he’s been a witness to, Gabe isn’t a big believer in fate or destiny. He doesn’t like the notion that a person is born into a life and has no control over what happens to them. What would be the point?

But if there’s one thing that’s become apparent ever since a beautiful, lonely stranger wandered into his café, it’s that he and Ellis were meant to meet. They were always meant to find each other. He knew it the second Ellis stood in front of him, face filled with righteous anger and heart full of sadness. A part of his soul reached out, brushing against Gabe’s as if saying:Hey, it’s you. I’ve been looking everywhere for you.

Gabe senses the moment the tethers holding Ellis together start to crumble and he steps in before they completely break. He wraps his arms around him tight, saying nothing as Ellis shakes against him, his body jolting with suppressed sobs. He pays it no attention when his own eyes start to fill with tears, feeling Ellis’ pain like his own. He invites the pain in, taking all of it willingly. He’ll take anything if it means Ellis’ heart will be a little lighter.

Gradually, the shaking subsides, Ellis’ breath evening out. Even his energy, as raw as it still is, becomes more solid, like the broken pieces have finally started to come together.

“I’m sorry I took so long,” he says, voice no longer slurred.

“I would’ve waited for as long as I had to,” Gabe promises, kissing Ellis’ temple. “But I admit, I’m glad you found me while I’m still in control of my bladder.”

Ellis begins to shake again, for an entirely different reason. His booming, addictive laugh fills Gabe with bone-deep warmth. God, he loves making him laugh. He could live on that sound alone.

Loosening his hold, Ellis pulls back so he can look at Gabe. His cheeks are tear-streaked and blotchy, but there’s a serenity in his gaze that wasn’t there before.

“I…”

He doesn’t get further than that. Gabe can tell he desperately wants to, his lips moving soundlessly and frustration filling his features when no words make it out.

After another failed attempt, Gabe covers Ellis’ lips with his fingers and smiles.

“It’s okay. I know.”