Page 31

Micki

Mathéo loves me. I still can’t believe it, but now that I dare to look closely, I can see it. In his piercing blue eyes, which soften when he looks at me. I can feel it in the way he treats me when we are together. Gentle but possessive when we’re out. His arm around my shoulders, his hand on my hip or on my back. Passionate and unbridled when we’re alone.

I’m slowing us down, I know that, but the fact that Mathéo seems so completely okay overwhelms me. Can’t he see the looks on people’s faces when he walks through our small town with a “whatever” in his arms?

“Whatever” is what people think when they see me in high heels and feminine clothes. I know who I am and, by now, I’m sure Mathéo does too. Everything else doesn’t matter, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t sting at least a little.

I’m also still overwhelmed by how completely normal it has become for Mathéo to touch me, to touch a man. I’m firm and angular, not soft and curvy. But he likes my body and can’t get enough of it. His hands are greedy and hot when they roam over my bare skin. There’s no more hesitation or restraint. I’m the one who slows us down because I’m still scared.

Mathéo walks out of the bathroom, stark naked. When he went in, he still had some boxers on, but I’m certainly not complaining. His body is divine, and I love that it’s mine. He could have anyone and everyone, but that pale muscular chest with little black curls is just for me.

My gaze wanders shamelessly over his shoulders and stomach to his cock, which hangs long and limp. I’m still getting used to the fact that Mathéo isn’t hard all the time when we’re together like this.

“Don’t look at me like that. You promised me we’d do something today. I’ve been here every weekend for two months and haven’t seen much more than the city center, the supermarket and the club. Adrien says it’s beautiful here. Show me something! What should I wear?” Reluctantly, I look into Mathéo’s stunning blue eyes.

“Do you want sporty or relaxed?”

His eyes flash at the word sport and he bounces on his balls as he answers. “I don’t care, whatever you want.”

Don’t care, my ass. “Have you brought anything for hiking?”

He has, he’s perfectly equipped to be exact. And so, fifteen minutes later, we’re in the car driving out of the city. We don’t have to go far, but the day is cool and clear, and the view will be fantastic.

“Up here.” I point to a small footpath.

“Okay, cool. Race you to the top!” And with these words, Mathéo runs off.

I’m taken by surprise for a moment, then I run after him. He may be more muscular than me, but I’m fit, even if you can’t tell by my looks, and I quickly catch up. We push and pull and shove along the narrow forest path. Mathéo is ambitious, but I don’t like to lose either, especially not on my own turf.

Time flies by and the tower rises up in the forest clearing much faster than expected.

“Up?” I’ve never seen Mathéo like this before. Free, with an open laugh, his gaze challenging. His otherwise pale skin is red from the exertion and the cold, but he is radiant. I don’t think I’ve ever had so much fun with a man.

“The winner gets a blowjob when we get home.” Again Mathéo shoots past me the moment the words left his lips. And again, it takes me two seconds, but I’m not going to let him win that easily, he can forget about that. We run up the steps of the tower like a monster is after us, screaming and laughing. Luckily we’re alone. I manage to catch up and on the last turn I take advantage of a small gap and push ahead of him to the finish line.

“Won!” I jump across the top platform with my arms raised high.

Shaking his head and breathing heavily, Mathéo closes in on me, pressing his body into mine and cupping my face with his hands. “Congratulations, it doesn’t feel like I’ve lost though.”

Shit... only now do I realize what that means. Damn it.

***

Mathéo was blown away by the view, as expected. We could see as far as Strasbourg and even the Vosges mountains were crystal clear. The descent was quick. I don’t think either of us can walk slowly, but we didn’t race. We held hands, kissed again and again, talked about everything and nothing. It was so beautifully mundane. Something I could do every day, just like that.

Will we ever have that? More than just the weekends? Would I be willing to move to Dijon if Mathéo can’t leave because of the company?

I shake off my thoughts as we return to my apartment.

“We take a shower first and then I’ll pay my debt.” But the way he looks at me and touches me, I don’t think he’ll be able to wait that long. The way he pulls the tight long-sleeved shirt over my head and the way his fingers glide over my bare chest after my shirt is gone confirms my intuition. I’ve had a few partners before Mathéo, but I’ve never felt so desired, so good in my body when I’ve been touched.

We stumble into the shower and Mathéo groans loudly as I pull my painted fingernails down his back with just enough pressure to hurt without breaking the skin. Two strong hands grip around my waist and push me against the wall. His fingers will leave marks, I’m sure of it, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. I’m not fragile, even though I might look like it.

Mathéo’s cock presses into my hip and while I’m already completely hard, I can feel his slowly waking up. Rolling his hips, he seeks friction as he reaches for my mouth with open lips. His teeth find my bottom lip and I forget everything around me as his tongue invades my mouth. I’ve never seen him so demanding, so dominant. He’s losing himself in my body and fuck, this is hot.

Then he gets down on his knees. An almost hysterical panic washes over me. I can’t let him do this. What if he finds it disgusting? What if it’s too gay for him after all? I’d rather not do it at all than risk that.

Strong fingers grab my cock, gentle lips glide over my stomach and groin with thousands of little kisses, and I can’t really think straight anymore, but the fear won’t go away.

I’ve never been afraid of anything, but the idea of losing him again tears me apart. With one hand, I reach into his curls and pull his head back with a firm jerk. “Wait.”

Mathéo’s closed eyes open slowly, his head still held back, his pupils dilated. They are so big that I can barely see any of his blue. Fuck, he wants this.

“You love me.” I think I actually wanted to say something else, but the sight of him makes all the clever words disappear. That’s all I can feel, that’s everything left in my head.

“More than anything if you’ll let me.” All the tension is released from my body, now it’s my head that falls back and presses against the tiles. My fingers loosen their grip and Mathéo closes his lips around my tip and lets my dick slide into his mouth.

You can tell he’s never done this before, that he’s exploring without a plan and without any kind of finesse, and yet it’s the best blowjob I’ve ever had because it’s him giving it. My Mathéo.

At some point, he finds a rhythm with his hand and his lips and I’m already so on edge I know I won’t last much longer. I can feel my orgasm building up, unstoppable, so much faster than I wanted. I want to pull out, but Mathéo holds me firmly in place. “Oh, fuck, I’m about to come. I’m about to come, you don’t have to do this, I ...” But he doesn’t stop, he doesn’t let go of me and I try really hard, but at some point I can’t hold back. My hips shoot forward as I come, and I hear a strangled sound before my body is flooded with a never-ending feeling of happiness and I’m no longer aware of anything around me.

As my surroundings slowly come back into focus, I see Mathéo, still kneeling on the floor in front of me.

“Get up.” I forcefully pull him up to me and turn him against the wall. I can be dominant too. My hand immediately goes to his cock and my lips meet his. I taste myself on his tongue and it’s so incredibly hot.

Mathéo comes fast and hard in my hand. His trembling fingers find my hips again pulling me against him, his head pushes into my neck and I love the way his breath tickles over my damp skin. “I’ve wanted to do this for so long. Thank you.”