Page 17 of Penance (Rising From the Ashes #2)

“What are you doing here?” I ask, eyeing both of them .

It’s only been two days since I saw them last, and that’s not nearly long enough to get over the constant headache they seem to leave me with.

“We’re your assistant coaches,” Campbell says, puffing out his chest as if that makes him some kind of hero instead of an annoyance. Hayes smirks.

“No.”

No one mentioned any assistants, and though I knew I would obviously have one, I never in a million years thought it would be either of them.

“You didn’t think we would let you do this alone, did you, Theo?” Hayes asks.

“I was hoping,” I mutter under my breath. Louder, I say, “Fine, but remember you asked me to be the head coach. That means you listen to me.”

Campbell lifts his hand in a Mark salute. “Aye, aye, captain,” he says before jogging off.

I look at Hayes. “Does he ever turn it off?

He glances at Campbell, and I swear there’s a flicker of concern in his eyes before he hides it with a smirk. “Never.”

I groan. “It’s going to be a long season.”

Hayes claps me on the back. “Come on, coach, let’s go meet your team.”

The boys are already waiting in the dugout with Campbell, and when I walk up, they all look my way. I don’t say anything at first, taking each of them in to get a fill, and they stare right back.

My eyes find Tanner. He’s standing on the edge with a group of boys I recognize from the football team.

He’s watching me with a guarded look, and I study him, looking for any signs of harm.

Josephine and Eric are not physically abusive, but they’re hell on him mentally.

He might not like to admit it, but Tanner is a sensitive kid.

He must see the question in my eyes because he tilts his head and shrugs.

Gritting my teeth, I pull my attention away from him and force myself to continue to look at the other boys.

Some of them I know. Some I don’t, but when I get to the end of the row, one kid stands out.

He’s the kid I saw with Zeb at that brush fire a couple of weeks ago.

His hands are clenched into fists by his side, and the way he’s looking at me could be a problem.

Hatred burns in his eyes, and I can only imagine what Zeb has told him.

This is going to be a fun season.

I take one more second to consider him, and then I look at the others, finally addressing them.

“Welcome to the team, boys. I’m Coach Sylvis.

I know we are getting a late start for practice, but I’ve heard a lot of good things about this team.

I want to make it clear that I expect hard work and discipline.

I also expect you to stay out of trouble.

I don’t care if you are a starter. If you break my rules, you’re out.

I value respect, and I understand that it’s earned.

I’ll earn your respect, and you earn mine. Any questions?”

All the boys shake their heads, and I clap my hands together. “Great. Let’s get started with some warm-ups. Twenty laps around the bases.”

A chorus of groans resounds around the boys, but they lay their stuff down and do what I ask.

The kid with the hate in his eyes passes me, grumbling about running being stupid, but I choose to let it go for now.

Tanner is the last one on the field, and he stops in front of me before going out. He doesn’t meet my eyes when he asks, “Are you mad at me?”

My brows furrow. “Why would I be mad at you, kid?”

“Because of how things happened the other day?”

“I would never be mad at you for that, Tanner.

He shrugs. “Mom was.”

My jaw tightens. “What do you mean? ”

“Nothing. It doesn’t matter.”

But from the sound of his voice, I can tell it does. Two days in, and Tanner is already suffering.

I sigh, pulling my ball cap out of my back pocket and shoving it on my head to prevent him from seeing what I’m thinking. He doesn’t need to see just how much I resent his mother. Scrubbing my face, I think about what to say to prevent that.

“Look, kid. You have every right to say what you feel, and I hope that’s what you did with the judge. But it’s also not my business what you said. I won’t get mad at you for it. I just hope you know that everything I’m doing is to protect you. Okay?”

“At the end of the summer, when this is all over, are you going to leave again?”

The question is an arrow striking its target right in the center of my chest, but I don’t blame him for asking it. I haven’t given him a lot of reasons to have confidence in me.

“No, Tanner, I’ll still be right here.”

He shakes his head. “That’s what mom says.”

I shouldn’t ask. I know I really shouldn’t ask. Everything that comes out of Josephine‘s mouth has always been a targeted attack. She’s meticulous in the way she manipulates. But even though I can see the manipulation from a mile away, I still fall into the trap.

“And what else does she say?”

He continues to avoid my gaze when he says, “That you aren’t the staying type. That you’ve never even been in a real relationship, and that when this is all over—and the judge gives her custody—you’ll leave.”

I’ve hated Josephine for a lot of things in my life, but I don’t think I’ve ever hated her as much as I do at this moment.

Stepping forward, I place my hand on my son’s shoulder.

“First of all, I’m not going anywhere, Tanner.

I know I’ve given you no reason to believe that, but I’ll prove it to you.

And second of all, your mother knows nothing about my relationships.

Sometimes, people value privacy, and I’m one of those people. ”

Tanner swallows hard and then nods, looking out onto the field. “I better get out there.”

He takes off jogging, leaving me behind.

A sour filling sticks in my stomach as I mull over what he said. Josephine thinks I have no personal connections, and apparently, the one I have with our son isn’t enough for her. Or the judge.

My mind goes to what Hayes said about Lily and me. I can never offer Lily anything real, but maybe I could offer her something useful. A fake relationship could benefit us both. I need the court to see me settling in here in Benton Falls, and in return, I could help her with her job.

Rolling my neck, I run over to where Hayes and Campbell stand in the middle of the field. They are watching the boys run, tracking their time in form. Hayes looks up from his clipboard when I stand beside him.

“Good talk?” he asks, but I don’t answer him. Instead, I nod at the kid I noticed earlier.

“Who is that?

He follows my gaze, and something dark passes over his face.

“That’s Morgan Ellis. He’s a heck of an athlete, but he has a terrible attitude.”

“Any relation to Zeb Ellis?” I ask, thinking back to the run-in I had with the man.

Hayes nods. “Yeah. It’s his dad.”

I groan. “I was afraid you’d say that.”

Part of being a good coach means building relationships with the players, but that’s nearly impossible when their view of you has already been tainted by their parents. It won’t stop me from trying. Each kid out on the field will get my all. It just makes it hard.

Hayes gives me a funny look, then turns his attention back to the field. “Morgan and Tanner actually had a few run-ins last year on the football team.”

“What kind of run-ins?” I ask, unsure if I’m more upset that Tanner was fighting or that I didn’t know about it.

“Relax, coach,” Hayes says, using his cop voice. “One battle at a time.”